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Maybe doing to much!!

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#1 JKL_WeddingMexico

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    Posted 03 April 2010 - 10:02 PM

    Hello Everyone,

    Just needed some advice. I am thinking that my DH and I are trying to do to much in one year. My DH has taken a position in a new city, and has currently been living there for 5 month. While he has been living there I have been back in our home town trying to sell our house so that we can both move and get settled in our new lives. We have finally got a conditional offer on our house and now both looking forward to living together again. But with all this I am also trying to plan a DW. Not sure who else has tried to do this alone.... but wow is it ever hard. Just seeing if theres other B2B out there planning a wedding alone?

    #2 snow88

    • Jr. Member
    • 181 posts

      Posted 04 April 2010 - 02:56 AM

      We just got engaged in February and we have been long distance dating for awhile. It's complicated but basically I met him while he was working in my country and then he went home because his boss didn't have anymore work. Now, he's waiting to start work in Bahamas. I'm planning the wedding from Cayman and he's been checking the accomodations for my friends and family in Jamaica for the wedding. He will be in Bahamas, I in Cayman and the wedding in Jamaica. It will be dificult plus I'm still trying to get the house finished.

      I was planning on getting married November 13 but we had to change it because of his new job.

      #3 midnight24

      • Member
      • 754 posts

        Posted 04 April 2010 - 03:03 AM

        i've sorta been dealing with that as well. we got engaged last april and FI went away to school for 3 months, then training for 2 months for his new job. he started working then we started looking at houses in september bought a place and moved in december. i've been doing most of the planning myself too. it's been a little frustrating at times but i realized that even if he was around more...i'd probably still be doing most of the legwork. i think it's just a guy thing...they don't care about all the little details like we do.

        i'm sure you are doing a fabulous job...and just remember one of the main reasons you picked a DW...because there is less details. keep focus on the important things...like marrying your best friend and being in a beautiful location surrounded by family/friends.

        good luck!

        #4 amygirl1169

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        • 653 posts

          Posted 04 April 2010 - 12:30 PM

          We booked our DW and purchased a house in the same week. It was incredibly stressful, but it'll be totally worth it!
          Good luck!

          #5 Amymarie

          • Jr. Member
          • 180 posts

            Posted 04 April 2010 - 01:53 PM

            If it makes you feel better, i have spent the last 7 months in Germany planning my DW and two AHR's with no help from my fiance. Whether you are with them or not you may not have that much help. I just packed up my life and returned to Alberta two days ago. I had my FIRST dress fitting and my wedding is next month. I am in panic mode big time, trying to pull everything together... the worst part is i am soo indecisive about so many things. Sooo you are not alone in the "doing too much" department.

            #6 Thomasjsgirl

            • Sr. Member
            • 1,098 posts

              Posted 04 April 2010 - 02:26 PM

              You're definitely in good company! My DH and I each had our own houses when we were engaged. His was a total redo - he bought a fixer-upper with the intention to fix-it-up and then flip it. Well, you know what they say about best-laid plans. It was supposed to have been completed & sold before we left to get married, and that never happened. I did what I could to help him, but I was also a "little" busy planning our wedding! I basically had to plan it myself, which as you can see from the previous responses, is not unusual! Thank goodness for all the advice and ideas found on this site. If it wasn't for BDW, I don't think I would have been able to do it. However, if you're feeling overwhelmed to the point that you want to just throw in the towel, may-be consider postponing your DW, but not indefinitely! Set another date that's reasonable, and carry on. You would be amazed at what a little breathing room can do for your peace of mind.

              Good luck and don't give up!
              Lucy & Tom - Married 24.11.08
              Wedding Review - Dreams PC:
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              #7 Melidell

              • Sr. Member
              • 1,091 posts

                Posted 04 April 2010 - 02:31 PM

                I don't live seperately from my FI but we bought a house and planned the wedding this past year and it does seem like a lot at once sometimes. I think that in your case email is your friend- I know my FI and I often work opposite shifts and we were emailing back and forth about planning things a lot at the beginning just because it was easier. Or I'd make sure that he's in charge of planning certain things just so that it all doesn't fall on you. Good luck with your planning- I'm sure you'll do fine!
                Loving married life!

                #8 Lynn2010

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                • 8 posts

                  Posted 09 April 2010 - 02:25 PM

                  Originally Posted by amygirl1169
                  We booked our DW and purchased a house in the same week. It was incredibly stressful, but it'll be totally worth it!
                  Good luck!
                  Exactly! it's very stressful. For me, I'm mostly planning the DW and reception at home by myself... my fiance is finishing a degree so I try not to drive him nuts with the details (he helps in certain instances when I find trouble with a vendor and gives me his opinion on things etc) but we are looking to buy a house this summer at the same time and sell my condo - I estimate that this will all happen the same summer we get married.

                  I am also planning a suprise graduation party for him next month and just found out my sister is expecting (she got married last summer, so I was busy with that too) and I'm throwing her a baby shower on top of this.

                  At the same time.... I too am in college... trying to finish by December of this year, while I work full time. I'm real overloaded. I can't wait until next year when things simmer down and I can get to know my new niece or nephew!

                  #9 bsf&jpg

                  • Jr. Member
                  • 222 posts

                    Posted 10 April 2010 - 11:58 AM

                    You guys are strong to even take things like this on.. but.. YOU CAN DO IT!!!!
                    Just always remember to breathe, take some moments out for YOURSELF, and just think... it will all be worth it in the end!!!!

                    You may even say, "I could go back and do it again" LOL

                    Best wishes to you all!

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