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NO Father Daughter Dance?

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#1 mctilleys

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    Posted 31 March 2010 - 07:14 PM

    I have a good relationship with my father, but we do not have a touchy-feely relationship. I have never seen my dad dance, and to be honest, I think it would be really weird to slow dance with my dad at my wedding. At first I did not think it would be a big deal to just not do a father daughter dance. My dad is walking me down the aisle and "giving me away." The problem is FI really wants to do a dance with his mom. When I mentioned not dancing with my dad to my mom, she looked at me like I was crazy. Part of me thinks I should just suck it up and dance with my dad for 3 uncomfortable minutes, but I would really like to explore some other options for something to do at the reception to replace the dance. I also thought about doing a faster dance, but again my dad does not dance. Please note, I am not a good slow dancer myself which makes this worse.....

    Any advise/suggestions would be great!


    #2 Thomasjsgirl

    • Sr. Member
    • 1,098 posts

      Posted 31 March 2010 - 07:51 PM

      You mentioned you've never seen him dance, but that doesn't mean he doesn't know how! A lot of men have trouble expressing emotion, but that doesn't mean they don't love you! May-be he really wants to share in this old-fashioned tradition with you, but is too reserved to talk about it. Would it be too uncomfortable for you to bring up the topic with him? May-be you can make a joke out of it and suggest you do some funky breakdance (yeah, showing my age) to break the ice and then segue into a convo about dancing with you at the wedding. If there's other stuff going on and you just don't want to dance with him, period, then it's going to put everyone in an awkward position because FI wants to dance with his mom. THis one is a tough one. WIsh I had better advice for you.
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      #3 tracy0716

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      • 431 posts

        Posted 31 March 2010 - 07:54 PM

        i feel ya...i am not a good dancer and feel awkward slow dancing in front of everyone. I'm sucking it up bc my FI and dad really want to have these dances. I guess maybe you should bring this up to your dad and see what he thinks. Maybe he'll agree with you and you guys can do a funny/fast dance with him or no dance at all...good luck!

        #4 hiccups

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        • 224 posts

          Posted 02 April 2010 - 12:01 AM

          I also don't have a touchy-feely relationship with my dad and think it would be kind of awkward to have a dance.

          Perhaps you should have a talk with him and see if he even wants to do it. You guys could maybe do something else together instead of a dance? I'm not sure what though!

          #5 lbcs

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          • 33 posts

            Posted 02 April 2010 - 09:54 AM

            I felt the same, but thought I shouldn't skip it all together. So I am doing a split dance with my dad, uncle, step dad. At least it breaks it up and its only one awkward minute with each of them!

            #6 mctilleys

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              Posted 02 April 2010 - 07:57 PM

              Well I talked to my dad and he said he wants to do the dance "unless he chickens out." He acknowledged he can't dance, which is good. However, I think he wants to do it because of the sentimental value, SO I was thinking if I could come up with something else to do besides a dance he would go for it. I just don't know what....

              Thanks for all the opinions. Keep them coming!

              #7 mlabbe

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                Posted 02 April 2010 - 08:32 PM

                I like the idea of doing something more inventive to avoid the discomfort of a slow dance... although that might turn out to be harder for him if he doesn't really know how to dance.

                Maybe you could have a dance the 4 of you at the same time, to take away all eyes on you and your dad, and let you FI have his dance with his mom?

                I'm skipping the father / mother dances, solves it for us!

                #8 ask9999

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                • 82 posts

                  Posted 10 April 2010 - 08:40 AM

                  I didnt do a father daughter dance, but my husband did dance with his mother. I think its your wedding and you should do whatever you want to make you happy. If youw ant to do a father daughter dance, make sure to pick a really short slow song. I also think the idea of doing the father/daughter and the mother/son dance at the same time or splitting it up between important male family members in your life is a great idea.

                  #9 mctilleys

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                    Posted 10 April 2010 - 11:15 AM

                    We will probably end up going with a short song all four of us can dance do unless I can think of something else. Any ideas for short songs?


                    #10 donutdjn

                    • Jr. Member
                    • 419 posts

                      Posted 10 April 2010 - 01:13 PM

                      I don't have a touchy relationship with my dad so we are not planning a dance, if it happens informally then fine but nothing planned.

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