What to do- friend can't afford to come
Posted 31 March 2010 - 09:31 AM
But, if you can offer, and you want to, then it's really sweet of you.
What about maybe offering to pay 50% or something??
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Posted 31 March 2010 - 09:47 AM
Posted 31 March 2010 - 11:55 AM
If she is a VERY important part of your life and your wedding simply wouldn't be the same without her, then I say pay maybe part of her expenses. I would suggest loaning her the money but that just spells disaster later down the road.
I understand your dilemma, but as others said, it depends on how much this person means to you. If it were my family or anyone in my bridal party, then yes, I would help them. Otherwise, probably not. Not because I don't love them, it's just that I expected this to happen with a DW. Such is life.
Posted 01 April 2010 - 01:55 PM
I would go with what your heart is telling you.. Good Luck!
P.S. If you do pay for her to come, I wouldn't tell a soul. People can get mad and expect you to pay their way... it will be bad all around.
http://img.weddingco...er/7nhul9k2.png32 guests including Bride and Groom... and counting
Posted 01 April 2010 - 02:31 PM
I offered to pay for her too and asked her to come alone and she doesn't' want to borrow money or fly alone, her and her husband aren't doing great financially so I get it. It really shocked me and I can't even believe she wont be there so I'd offer if you want her there but if she's going through a tough time financially she may not be able to pay you back for awhile.
Posted 01 April 2010 - 02:44 PM
If in your heart you really want her there - offer to pay for her and see her reaction - noone else has to know. But dont offer to pay for her and then forever hold it against her ie; let in niggle away in the back of your mind.
Posted 01 April 2010 - 03:55 PM
I think if it is someone really important and they truely dont have the money to afford it and you do and you really want them there then you should do it. xx
Posted 01 April 2010 - 05:03 PM
I think that what ever you choose to do tread carefully as money can have a habit of changing relationships! Good luck to you x
Posted 01 April 2010 - 08:47 PM
Posted 01 April 2010 - 10:51 PM
| Originally Posted by ktchi |
Thanks for all the advice. I have a lot to think about. I have given myself until next week to figure out what I am going to do. I think offering to pay half sounds like a reasonable idea so I can still feel like I made the effort to help her out and have her there, but not feel too guilty for having paid for everything. I can put the ball back in her court. If she still can't do it- then at least I tried and it wasn't meant to be.
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