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RonNMel

lobster is extra

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The dinner for every guest is included in my wedding package. We choose a set menu as there will be over 15 guests. However, every guest has the possibility to choose lobster instead of our set menu, at an extra cost of 18 CUC. Who should pay for that extra cost?

 

Reading other threads, I would guess that etiquette says I should pay for this. But at the same time, this is not something I choose for them, but something that guests choose for themselves. Also, since not everyone will choose the lobster, I feel bad for paying an extra for only some of my guests. Those who eat from the regular menu won't get that extra money spent on them.

 

What to do?

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The lobster is free for the bride and groom, and there is NO WAY that my FI will pass on the chance of eating lobster. He likes it way too much. I know many of his family and friends will want it too, as they are Asians and love everything fish & seafood.

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I would pick up the tab for whomever chooses to order the lobster. Make arrangements ahead of time that you will pay the bill so there is no confusion or awkwardness if your guests were presented with a bill.

 

Think of it this way...

 

If you offer bar service, you still pay for those who don't drink or don't drink as much as others.

 

My mom doesn't eat shellfish and some of my close friends are allergic. If we go out to eat or host a party with a seafood dish, they choose not to eat it. They don't come to me after the party and say "Hey I want $3 cash because I skipped the shrimp".

 

I mean this in the nicest possible way - Don't over-think things. It was a hard lesson for me to learn while planning!

 

Good Luck!

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I think since you will be eating lobster in front of your guests and you are offering it to them, then you should pay the extra fee, not the guest. If you don't want to pay the extra fee, don't eat lobster!! wink.gif

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I definitely do not think your guests should be handed a bill. Why not just order lobster another time? It'll be much cheaper than paying for each guest that wants it.

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Second... smile41.gif

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kristy! View Post
I definitely do not think your guests should be handed a bill. Why not just order lobster another time? It'll be much cheaper than paying for each guest that wants it.

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The only thing I will add is that you are already asking your friends/family to fly out to Cuba for your wedding, which is expensive, and they are already going out of their way for you. Pay for the lobster, or don't have it, like Kristy said, and let your FI have it at another point on your trip.

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^ +1

 

18CUC is not that much in the grand scheme of things. I think it would be a somewhat awkward conversation to have, too ...Telling your guest (including the in-laws) they need to cough it up if they want lobster.

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I agree with the other comments. You should either pay for the lobster or not offer it at all. The cost is not that much (certainly far less than having it at home) and your guests will probably be impressed that it's an option. Alternatively, leave it off the menu and have it with your FI another night.

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