Mr. and Mrs. or Mr. and Dr.?
Posted 22 February 2010 - 01:08 PM
Posted 22 February 2010 - 01:10 PM
Posted 25 February 2010 - 04:03 PM
The only reason it "sounds awkward" is b/c its been men getting the advance degrees for too long! It is a societal pressure, just as taking his name is. If Mr. and Dr. makes people uncomfortable, then all the more reason Women are Dr's now too, so I think when it doesn't sound awkward to be a Mr. and Dr., it will be a good day!
Still, I do not disagree if someone else would want to do it a different way and go by Mrs. It is a personal choice, so go with what you feel like doing and don't worry about others...just your future husband. You worked hard and it is your title, so if it is important to you, use it, just as he would. I am also a Dr., (Ph.D in Pharmacology), and I plan on using it every single time I can. It was a lot of work!! But my fiance is too, so I guess that means Dr. and Dr. on our wedding day!
Posted 25 February 2010 - 07:05 PM
Posted 25 February 2010 - 07:16 PM
Posted 25 February 2010 - 10:58 PM
Congrats to all the doctors here: MD, DVM, and PhD's here. I'm a PharmD, just to add to the mix of degrees.
Posted 26 February 2010 - 12:21 AM
Ultimately it's up to you though, so as long as you and your FI are happy with whatever you decide then that's all that really matters.
Posted 30 September 2012 - 11:57 PM
â€œDr. & Mr.â€ IS THE CORRECT WAY TO BE INTRODUCED WHEN USING TITLES !!!!!
(Assuming you are planning taking and using his last name in all settings, you would be â€œDr. and Mr. Jonesâ€ if titles but no first names are being used.) The â€œhigher rankingâ€ title is always listed first. If titles are to be used, they might as well be used correctly (http://www.emilypost...-correspondence). Happily people with advanced academic and professional degrees fall in love and become part of stable couples all the time, and almost nobody would blink an eye if â€œDr. and Mrs.â€ or â€œReverend & Mrs. Johnsonâ€ were introducedâ€¦
That said, if you are uncomfortable with it and/or your wedding is less formal, forgoing titles altogether is an excellent option. As â€œecho2_62â€ suggested, I think "Let me introduce the new couple - (HisName) & (YourName) LastName" is a great plan.
I am in a similar situation as â€œDolphinMareDVMâ€. I have a PhD and go by my maiden name in professional settings because that is how I am known. Iâ€™m also not into titles or formality, so I often introduce myself as â€œAnn MaidenNameâ€ â€“ after all, we are people with names more than we are titles. However, if a title is appropriate or for asked in conjunction with my maiden name I ALWAYS used the correct one - Dr.
Again, perhaps like â€œDolphinMareDVMâ€ I have also often used â€œMrs. New/MarriedLastNameâ€ in social situations with my husband, as having a professional degree didnâ€™t seem as relevant to me in this context (and, as I said, Iâ€™m not really into titles and adding â€œprestigious lettersâ€ to oneâ€™s name if itâ€™s not specifically appropriate anyway). However, I am now changing my opinion after thinking about it due to this post - not because I care that anyone knows I have a degree if itâ€™s not relevant, but because I do think itâ€™s important to think about the impact of our actions on the world around us.
When I think about it, I would think it was weird if my husband had a degree where he normally went by â€œDr.â€, but for some reason he consciously decided to only go by â€œMr.â€ in social situations where I was present and/or also named. What kind of example are we setting for those around us and for our daughters as a blog full of intelligent-sounding women who donâ€™t know that our name and title should be listed first if we have an advanced degree and our husband does not!?! With weddings, all sorts of formality is present with wording or times and names and titles â€“ why donâ€™t we know this? If we keep this up, it will always â€œsound awkwardâ€ to have couples where the woman happens to have more education than her husband. Ideally, I think we should live in a world where everyone knows that â€œDr. & Mr.â€ is just as appropriate as â€œDr. & Mrs.â€â€¦ Perhaps we shouldnâ€™t be surprised that we still live in a country where the majority of our congressmen, CEOs, supreme court justices, etc. are men. In all fairness, how can we expect others to treat us and our accomplishments with the same amount of respect if we donâ€™t naturally expect it for ourselves?
(I know this post is old, but I thought Iâ€™d respond just in case this is relevant to anyone else.)
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