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Does anyone else feel awkward about having a bridal shower?

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Quote:
Originally Posted by SonyaR View Post
I don't want one as I am asking people to take a week's vacation to be able to attend our wedding and we've been together for 11 years and don't need anything. My family tends to be traditional so they may put something together but hopefully they will honour my wishes.
Sometimes it really it more about your family. My sister also did not want to have a shower but some people really wanted to give gifts. It's their way of honoring you and your wedding. So in a way you are making them happy by allowing them to give you a gift.

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Over here in the UK we don't really 'do' Bridal Showers, but it sounds like most of you have got great family and friends that are willing to throw you one and I say if they want you to have one then go with it! This is your big day and just because your having a DW doesn't mean that you do not deserve to have a shower!

On the other hand though, I understand not wanting gifts and the unease of people spending lots of money already having to bring gifts...!

 

For the people that are coming to Mexico we are going to have a mini very tame Hen and Stag nights(which are like bachelor and bachelorette). This is going to be a surpise for them, so then they won't have a chance to buy gifts!!

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A question for brides out there, I don't necessarily understand tradition on showers, from what I understand you usually invite your bridesmaids to all of your showers but they are only expected to attend and give a gift for one shower. I was also under the assumption both sets of parents would be invited to all showers, is this correct?

 

My future sister-in-law is throwing us a shower and we just gave her our invite list and she wanted to know why my parents were on there and let us know that it was a couples shower. I feel sort of offended by this. My parents are married so it's not like the couples shower would bring awkwardness. Also we are inviting my FI's parents and they live double the distance away from where we live and they are planning on attending.

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I have a etiquette question on bridal shower. We are getting married in Cancun on 11-11-10 and having an AHR on 1-22-11. I have been in 13 weddings, MOH 8 times and spent a lot of money throwing showers and bachelorette parties etc. over the years. Not counting the fact that I am 39 and most of the friends in the wedding also had babies so I also threw baby showers. My aunt and a close friend of the family is throwing the bridal shower. My question is about the guest list. I have a guest list for people we invited to the destination and then we have additional guests being invited only to the AHR. Do I need the AHR invites to go out before I do the bridal shower so people realize that even if they are not coming to the destination wedding(or did not get invited) they are invited to celebrate with us at a reception? This is a hard one!

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Quote:
Originally Posted by shanbeth View Post
I have a etiquette question on bridal shower. We are getting married in Cancun on 11-11-10 and having an AHR on 1-22-11. I have been in 13 weddings, MOH 8 times and spent a lot of money throwing showers and bachelorette parties etc. over the years. Not counting the fact that I am 39 and most of the friends in the wedding also had babies so I also threw baby showers. My aunt and a close friend of the family is throwing the bridal shower. My question is about the guest list. I have a guest list for people we invited to the destination and then we have additional guests being invited only to the AHR. Do I need the AHR invites to go out before I do the bridal shower so people realize that even if they are not coming to the destination wedding(or did not get invited) they are invited to celebrate with us at a reception? This is a hard one!
I would suggest sending out the AHR invites before shower invites. This way they know they are invited to the reception. : ) Or when you send out the shower invites, put an insert that is just like a save the date for the reception, then send the invites later! Just a thought

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They people who I work with threw a shower for me on the last day of school. My mother and sister also had a shower for me. I think my friends and family were happy that we had a shower because we are only inviting parents and siblings to the wedding. I don't think anyone was offended! Well at least they didn't tell me! ; )

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Quote:
Originally Posted by shanbeth View Post
I have a etiquette question on bridal shower.

Do I need the AHR invites to go out before I do the bridal shower so people realize that even if they are not coming to the destination wedding(or did not get invited) they are invited to celebrate with us at a reception? This is a hard one!
I am sending Save the Dates for the AHR this month. My AHR is on 12/11 for which I will send those invites in October. This way, those not going to Jamaica will know about the AHR well before my MOH sends out the shower invites. And I feel the same way as you! I am 36, and probably the last of all my friends to marry, so I have been a BM numerous times and attended plenty of bridal and baby showers...it's my turn now :)

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I don't want a shower or gift registry but FI's mom is pretty set... none of my female friends even live in the same state anymore!! I hope I can stand my ground without offending her.

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I also feel the same way however there are many people that arent coming that want to feel as though they are apart of the wedding etc. My bridal party is throwing me one but I have stated that I do not expect gifts...its more of a get-together in my mind..

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I kicked and screamed about a not having a shower. We have lived together for 4 years and own a condo - we don't need anything. I lost the battle and had a wedding shower with 55 guests. Although I am so thankful for people who can't make it to the wedding to want to share in the wedding festivities and my mother and MOH for throwing this shower, it was def. more of an event for other people rather than myself. It was stressful and not my thing at all.

 

Power to the brides who don't want a shower and win!

 

..now onto the at-home reception battle.

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