BM bailed on my bachelorette party....wrong to be mad?

[Krista_H]

Quote:

Originally Posted by svetayasofiya life is too short to keep selfish people like that close to you.

Couldn't have said it better myself!!

[Oryx]

I'd be upset... I'd confront her and see what she has to say. And like svetayasofiya said, life is too short -- drop this excess baggage and don't let it get you down.

[Reya]

I would be upset too.....but there are some very SELFISH people out there.

 

About confronting her, I would ask her honestly if she still wants to be in the wedding or not - maybe she's having doubts and has wanted to back out for along time and she didn't have the nerve to tell you - at least you are giving her an OUT..... is there a possiblilty that she may be JEALOUS

 

If she doesn't want out then you should tell her that you're not being a BRIDEZILLA or anything but that you thought that as your BM she of all people would be there, and that you are disappointed - sometimes that is worse than yelling at people.

[shellk]

its difficult with your wedding being soo close but she could have done the decent thing and answered one of your calls or told you what was happening.it is one of her jobs as a bm to be at your party right?

 

just dont let her spoil your happiness

[brandynd]

Well….I’m working the uber slow night shift tonight (funny as I type that the phone in my office rings), so I thought I’d update you on what’s going on. The BM still hasn’t had the nerve to call me, but I did receive a text earlier this afternoon saying “Brandy I know you’re mad at me and I’m sorry, but I was sick. I understand I wasn’t there, but I can’t help that.”

If she was so sick, then why was she getting home at 3 in the freaking morning? It just seems like all too convenient of an excuse if you ask me. I’m not even going to argue with her about it though. I feel like I’m at my wits end with my bridal party, and it’s hit the point where I’m more looking forward to my wedding being over than to the actual wedding itself, which is sad. No bride should feel the way that I feel.

It’s not just her either. One of my other BM’s who shall remain anonymous called me the day before the wedding shower. I asked her if she was coming to the shower and bachelorette (she hadn’t even lifted a finger to help the 2 BM’s who put the whole thing together) and she started in on this whole schpiel about how she’d be there, but wasn’t bringing a gift because “I don’t have money to buy you a million gifts Brandy.”

What the hell?! I didn’t ask her to get me anything, I just asked if she would be there. She then went on to complain that she had to work Friday night so she could get her hair done for the wedding, which she didn’t even want to do (I told them if they didn’t want to go to the salon they didn’t have to), and to pay for her hotel that she didn’t even want to stay in (it’s called a cab, maybe she should catch one if paying $99 for a $300 suite is too much.)

This is the type of attitude that I get from my BM’s on a daily basis. Just feels like everything is stacked up against me, and I’m trying SO hard not to go Bridezilla on these women, but my nerves are getting worn down to the point where I’m about to blow up at some people. I’m not trying to be a PITA, but jesus.

Anyways, just one last little add on to my bitch fest. While we were at the bar FI’s big sister (another BM) came up and said “Thank you so much for making us book our trip to Mexico. We had soooo much fun! Oh, I bet you’re bummed you guys didn’t go and get married down there, huh?”

All I could say was “I’m glad you had fun.” Then I took the drink she had just bought me, and I walked away.

The wedding gods hate me. Vegas has never sounded SOOO good. 12 days and counting, and thank god for my BM’s who actually care. They are the only thing standing between me and insanity. The end.

[jplovesme]

Wow. 3 of your BMs suck. That's too much drama for you. Too bad one of them is your future sis. Ech. I'm so sorry the situation hasn't gotten better... At least you know who you need to cut out of your life once the wedding is over. For now, try to look forward to getting married, and when the day comes, just ignore them (if you decide to keep them in your wedding party). remember, its your day, and if you don't want them in your wedding party, then cut them out. Or have your good BMs keep those b**ches out of your way.

 

We're still here for you if you need to vent more! Hang in there!!!!!

 

Quote:

Originally Posted by brandynd Well….I’m working the uber slow night shift tonight (funny as I type that the phone in my office rings), so I thought I’d update you on what’s going on. The BM still hasn’t had the nerve to call me, but I did receive a text earlier this afternoon saying “Brandy I know you’re mad at me and I’m sorry, but I was sick. I understand I wasn’t there, but I can’t help that.†If she was so sick, then why was she getting home at 3 in the freaking morning? It just seems like all too convenient of an excuse if you ask me. I’m not even going to argue with her about it though. I feel like I’m at my wits end with my bridal party, and it’s hit the point where I’m more looking forward to my wedding being over than to the actual wedding itself, which is sad. No bride should feel the way that I feel. It’s not just her either. One of my other BM’s who shall remain anonymous called me the day before the wedding shower. I asked her if she was coming to the shower and bachelorette (she hadn’t even lifted a finger to help the 2 BM’s who put the whole thing together) and she started in on this whole schpiel about how she’d be there, but wasn’t bringing a gift because “I don’t have money to buy you a million gifts Brandy.†What the hell?! I didn’t ask her to get me anything, I just asked if she would be there. She then went on to complain that she had to work Friday night so she could get her hair done for the wedding, which she didn’t even want to do (I told them if they didn’t want to go to the salon they didn’t have to), and to pay for her hotel that she didn’t even want to stay in (it’s called a cab, maybe she should catch one if paying $99 for a $300 suite is too much.) This is the type of attitude that I get from my BM’s on a daily basis. Just feels like everything is stacked up against me, and I’m trying SO hard not to go Bridezilla on these women, but my nerves are getting worn down to the point where I’m about to blow up at some people. I’m not trying to be a PITA, but jesus. Anyways, just one last little add on to my bitch fest. While we were at the bar FI’s big sister (another BM) came up and said “Thank you so much for making us book our trip to Mexico. We had soooo much fun! Oh, I bet you’re bummed you guys didn’t go and get married down there, huh?†All I could say was “I’m glad you had fun.†Then I took the drink she had just bought me, and I walked away. The wedding gods hate me. Vegas has never sounded SOOO good. 12 days and counting, and thank god for my BM’s who actually care. They are the only thing standing between me and insanity. The end.

[Oryx]

Quote:

Originally Posted by brandynd Well….I’m working the uber slow night shift tonight (funny as I type that the phone in my office rings), so I thought I’d update you on what’s going on. The BM still hasn’t had the nerve to call me, but I did receive a text earlier this afternoon saying “Brandy I know you’re mad at me and I’m sorry, but I was sick. I understand I wasn’t there, but I can’t help that.†If she was so sick, then why was she getting home at 3 in the freaking morning? It just seems like all too convenient of an excuse if you ask me. I’m not even going to argue with her about it though. I feel like I’m at my wits end with my bridal party, and it’s hit the point where I’m more looking forward to my wedding being over than to the actual wedding itself, which is sad. No bride should feel the way that I feel. It’s not just her either. One of my other BM’s who shall remain anonymous called me the day before the wedding shower. I asked her if she was coming to the shower and bachelorette (she hadn’t even lifted a finger to help the 2 BM’s who put the whole thing together) and she started in on this whole schpiel about how she’d be there, but wasn’t bringing a gift because “I don’t have money to buy you a million gifts Brandy.†What the hell?! I didn’t ask her to get me anything, I just asked if she would be there. She then went on to complain that she had to work Friday night so she could get her hair done for the wedding, which she didn’t even want to do (I told them if they didn’t want to go to the salon they didn’t have to), and to pay for her hotel that she didn’t even want to stay in (it’s called a cab, maybe she should catch one if paying $99 for a $300 suite is too much.) This is the type of attitude that I get from my BM’s on a daily basis. Just feels like everything is stacked up against me, and I’m trying SO hard not to go Bridezilla on these women, but my nerves are getting worn down to the point where I’m about to blow up at some people. I’m not trying to be a PITA, but jesus. Anyways, just one last little add on to my bitch fest. While we were at the bar FI’s big sister (another BM) came up and said “Thank you so much for making us book our trip to Mexico. We had soooo much fun! Oh, I bet you’re bummed you guys didn’t go and get married down there, huh?†All I could say was “I’m glad you had fun.†Then I took the drink she had just bought me, and I walked away. The wedding gods hate me. Vegas has never sounded SOOO good. 12 days and counting, and thank god for my BM’s who actually care. They are the only thing standing between me and insanity. The end.

Wow, that is just unbelievable. A text message instead of a phone call? These are not your true friends. Despite all the things that have gone wrong, please remember that in the end, you will still be getting married to the one you love! Screw anyone else who just doesn't get it.

[*HOLLY*]

BM lately suck big balls!

I would of been upset also! You need to confront her and go from there. Totally not cool on how she bailed.

[LadyTrunck]

With the new info, and of course the previous- I am so sorry you have to go through this. When I read that you were wishing the wedding was over, it broke my heart. Please don't let them get to you, they sound like super selfish people. I agree with the above comments-- life is too short to have "friends" like this. Sending hugs your way!

[svetayasofiya]

Oh Brandy, your friends suck. I am sorry, but this just isn't how friends should treat eachother. ((hugs)) How many BM's do you have? Can you kick those two to the wayside? No one should have that kind of power to make you wish your wedding was over. That's just plain wrong in so many ways.

 

(Btw- why did you have to change your wedding from Mexico to Omaha?)