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Why do people INSIST on stressing you????

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22 replies to this topic

#1 JennandMike08

  • Jr. Member
  • 166 posts

    Posted 14 January 2010 - 06:54 PM

    When FI and I originally set our date people discouraged us to the point we cancelled our original DW plans. After talking to each other we realized this is really what we wanted to do so we re-set our date. We emailed all of our family AFTER we set our date and made our plans and intentionally told them that we are NOT stressing ourselves with the details of who is coming and who isn't. If you come, GREAT! If not then its ok too...
    But people still insist on stressing us with their details.

    My cousin is too cheap to spend a little extra than what she normally pays for vacations (mind you she travels ALL the time on discounts)...

    My best friend said it will be a deal breaker for her if she HAS to stay at ROR, because she found a cheaper resort...

    WTH? Are people really insistent on stressing me out I specifically told my family, this is not about YOU, its about us and what WE want.

    Sorry, I just needed to vent for a second...

    #2 mrstorrestobe

    • Newbie
    • 21 posts

      Posted 14 January 2010 - 07:15 PM

      I think close to every destination bride and groom goes through some amount of this and it sucks!! But, finally, my fiance and I realized that all that matters is that he and I are there, and a minister to marry us! Now we are getting married in 21 days at ROR and there will be 19 of us total and I am stoked about it! I think it's a great number and people who we dearly love, and who obviously dearly love us will be there! But even some of the ones going stressed me out some point along the way about the destination part! Just don't listen, and don't let them stress you out!! I know you need to vent!

      #3 carolina24

      • Sr. Member
      • 1,573 posts

        Posted 14 January 2010 - 08:57 PM

        GOOD FOR YOU!!!!!!! sorry if this sounds bad but SCREW THEM, imo! people suck...it is all about the two of you. when FI and i decided on a DW, we knew it might just be the two of us and that's perfectly fine....50 years from now when youre both old and wrinkly it'll be just the two of you sitting on the couch enjoying your time together!

        #4 Patti

        • Member
        • 555 posts

          Posted 14 January 2010 - 09:00 PM

          Strange, how people are. Don't worry about it. Just keep reminding yourself that it's your wedding and that's all that counts.

          #5 Pastryqueen_Tanya

          • Jr. Member
          • 417 posts

            Posted 14 January 2010 - 09:30 PM

            Like everyone else we ran in to the same problem. We are also going to ROR, and people were like "how much?!!". Whatever! I tried to please everyone...and now its about us. 30 people booked and it will be a blast. I will not miss most of those that did not book.
            Go and Enjoy! It will be amazing no matter who is there, just stop listening!

            #6 Pandabride6

            • Newbie
            • 95 posts

              Posted 14 January 2010 - 10:18 PM

              Keep in mind that people will call your bluff throughout your DW planning process. I've gone through this and tried to compromise to accommodate others. If they're still not satisfied... who cares? You try not to be selfish but them you realize that's all you can be, especially if you don't want to be miserable.

              You'll be surprised who ends up going in the end... that's IF you choose to invite them after they put you through stress, lol.
              Can't wait to honor our family roots... and establish new ones... Montego Bay, Jamaica, June 5, 2010

              The view overlooking Kingston... January 2009. One Love!!

              #7 CHAKLIT

              • Jr. Member
              • 260 posts

                Posted 14 January 2010 - 10:24 PM

                I wouldn't care...b/c it's about me and my honey...as long as our parents & our daughter make it..I'm good! So far, no stress...our folks have been great...expecially since we told ppl our date 18 months in advance.
                I've booked Heather Parker for my photographer for my April 2, 2011 wedding in Ochi Rios, Jamaica. If anyone is getting married in Jamaica days before or after me and is interested sharing her travel expenses to save few wedding budget bucks, let me know. Take a look at her work for Moon Dance...

                #8 budgetjamaicabride

                • Member
                • 516 posts

                  Posted 14 January 2010 - 10:42 PM

                  We went through the same thing with some people even though we had chosen a very affordable resort in Breezes. In the end we had 40 people who were really happy and loved the trip! You just never know. If you are serious about not stressing who's coming then you need to make yourself a sign that says so and keep reminding your self of what you are excited about.

                  #9 surprise4us

                  • Newbie
                  • 119 posts

                    Posted 14 January 2010 - 10:48 PM

                    We are going through this right now. Everyday I spend on here looking to see if I can find an idea that might be less expensive or a time to go that I am able to but that is not as expensive, not possible. I am a teacher. I am tired of stressing out to please people who may not even come in the end. I have decieded to just do what we want to do and if you come you come and if you don't, see you when we get back! Of course that is easy to say, but it is still hard when people complain to me.

                    Why can't people just be nice.
                    Try not to stress to much. This is your wedding.

                    #10 kun09

                    • Newbie
                    • 18 posts

                      Posted 14 January 2010 - 11:29 PM

                      I mostly have my FI's sister stressing me out. She keeps complaining about the cost but we told everyone from the beginning that we'd like you there but we'd understand if you can't make it. My FI keeps telling me not to worry about it that it is our day but I'm ready to really hurt some people. :) I wanted a nice quiet resort, maybe a little more expensive than we orginally planned, but this is what I want!! I hear all your pain

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