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Selfish People

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15 replies to this topic

#11 damaris

  • Jr. Member
  • 462 posts

    Posted 30 December 2009 - 05:41 PM

    I think mostly all of us have gone through this talk with a parent or relative. People always are opposed to trying something different. My advice to you is tell them that they should look at it as a wedding and vacation rolled into one. I have sold it to some family members as an opportunity to visit someplace they've never been before and experience something different. I went 5 years ago to my first destination wedding, some people that were going were complaining till they got there. Then all you heard was how that was the best experience ever and how they would do it again in a heartbeat. Since then 4 other couples have done DW's and it's always the same. The biggest and loudest complainers enjoy it the most.


    #12 Sapphire723

    • Member
    • 888 posts

      Posted 30 December 2009 - 06:06 PM

      If she had asked me "How do you expect people to come to your wedding?" I would have given her this response: "We chose a DW, because we knew that it would sort out the people who really WANT to celebrate with us from the people who are just showing up for the free dinner and open bar."

      In all seriousness, it sucks that she's acting like that, and hopefully that's just her negativity and not your father's. And this is all about you and your FI, NOT her, so don't sweat it.... and feel free to vent any time you need to.

      #13 KittenHeart

      • Sr. Member
      • 3,103 posts

        Posted 30 December 2009 - 07:02 PM

        Vent away, this is why we're here!

        Myself and MANY other DW brides feel you girl, I have no family coming and even had a "friend" cancel her entire trip because we were supposed to meet for coffee and I was busy twice and couldn't make it. She emailed me the next day saying she cancelled her trip because we weren't that good of friends anyways... so it's as if people use your wedding against you.

        What has worked the best for me is NOT feeding the flame or arguing my point. When someone gives me BS or complains I tell them, "I totally understand, you don't have to come."

        That has actually gotten a few people to shut up and turn around and tell me they ARE coming =)

        #14 Fruitcrush

        • Newbie
        • 41 posts

          Posted 30 December 2009 - 08:03 PM

          Thanks to everything that made me feel better! It's nice that we can all relate in some way or another! I have def. cooled down and talked to FI and he and I have both realized that we can't let people get to us. I can't say that I won't let it get to me, because I am so overly sensitive it's bound to happen again. I know that I can't let people get me down or make me feel guilty. It's almost like they do it because they can. I figure the people that come are those that have truly made the effort. I do understand that financially, not everyone can come. But don't make the excuse that you can't come or get the time off when I already know you are taking an extravagant trip!

          **Stay Positive!!


          #15 Rainfall

          • Jr. Member
          • 165 posts

            Posted 01 January 2010 - 05:52 PM

            Your wedding is about you and FI and no-one else. It took me a while to realize this but do what you want and forget the rest!

            #16 **~Linda~**

            • Sr. Member
            • 1,326 posts

              Posted 01 January 2010 - 09:41 PM

              You keep on with your mindset girl. Its all about you and your FI you definitely dont have it wrong! Dont let what anyone says change your mind about where you should have your wedding. I have to completely agree with you on the fact that if someone else were paying for the wedding it would be understandable as to them trying to have a say in where it should take place. Either way I really still feel its up to the couple to decide on where their "DAY" will be. Tons of great vibes headed your way!

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