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how can I address invitations that excludes kids


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#1 giraffexx

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    Posted 09 December 2009 - 11:48 AM

    I am trying to figure out how to address STD/invitations to family and friends who are being invited without their kids. I want to make it clear that only the adults/parents are invited. But how do I politely do that? Thanks in advance for the help!

    #2 PVBride2010

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      Posted 09 December 2009 - 12:02 PM

      From what I read, the inner enevlope lists the people who are invited. I think it is proper etiquette for people to know that if their children's name are not there then they should not come. My friend's wedding was like this & kids were still there! She even mentioned it to mostly everyone that was invited & hired a babysitter to watch kids if the parents were staying at the hotel! Good luck, this wedding stuff is stressful!

      #3 carolina24

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        Posted 09 December 2009 - 02:07 PM

        I am addressing outer envelopes "Mr and Mrs Doe" and inner evelopes "John Doe and Jane Doe" HOWEVER, I know that people feel like they can bring kids and guests and such so I've also stated very cleary on our website that kids and guests are not invited; if they want to come for the vacation that's ok, but they will not be involved in the wedding events. My main advice is that you have to be firm with people because they will start asking about this and if you budge once, your screwed!! BE STRONG!!

        #4 frazali

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          Posted 09 December 2009 - 03:33 PM

          I agree, put the actual invitees on the inner envelope.

          You may also want to include info on babysitting services at the resort if you are inviting anyone with kids. That way they are more inclined to come.

          #5 jk1101

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            Posted 09 December 2009 - 03:48 PM

            Quote:
            Originally Posted by carolina24
            I am addressing outer envelopes "Mr and Mrs Doe" and inner evelopes "John Doe and Jane Doe" HOWEVER, I know that people feel like they can bring kids and guests and such so I've also stated very cleary on our website that kids and guests are not invited; if they want to come for the vacation that's ok, but they will not be involved in the wedding events. My main advice is that you have to be firm with people because they will start asking about this and if you budge once, your screwed!! BE STRONG!!
            I didn't have inner envelopes.
            On my outer envelopes I was very informal and used first names so "Jane and John Doe" - Carolina's is the proper formal way.
            Everyone that knows FI and me knows we aren't kid people and I've specifically told the few people that have kids that this is a child free event.

            #6 Simistar

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              Posted 09 December 2009 - 08:09 PM

              You know, what's funny is, it didn't even occur to me (stupid, silly me:-)) that people would assume their children and/or whole family was invited...
              but that's what happened!:-)

              The invites we sent out were clearly addressed to X and X...
              We got married at Secrets Maroma, which is adults only, so I think many people realized their little children couldn't come as soon as they looked into the resort...
              However, there were some people who had grown children who just assumed the whole family was invited...which they weren't... (* we wanted to keep our wedding SMALL!:-))...
              My MIL had to call them to clarify...(since these guests never told us their plans, but did mention it to my in-laws...)

              Anywaaaay, point is, it IS a good idea to somehow make this clear...whether it's on the invites or your website.... b/c you may be surprised at how many people ASSUME they're invited, when they're not:-)
              (I know I was :-))

              #7 barcelo1162010

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                Posted 09 December 2009 - 09:33 PM

                Are you having a website listed where they can check for more info. If so, I would just address the STD to the couple and put on the website what you just said. Your family is more than welcome to come on vacation; but the wedding events are adult only and perhaps put something about the childcare services offered... If you are worried about adult children coming; put something about wanting it to be a small intimate affair; so same deal; more than welcome to come on vacation but the wedding events will be for your close friends and family.

                #8 mrscheeze

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                  Posted 10 December 2009 - 03:42 AM

                  i have seen invitations worded like "adult ceremony" or "adult reception" and i think that is what i may do

                  #9 TonyandTricia

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                    Posted 10 December 2009 - 01:08 PM

                    Although they are supposed to know that the invite is ONLY for those listed on the envelope, people don't always follow it. (Especially my family!!!) We decided to write on the RSVP card..."_____ number of seats have been reserved in your honor" so that it's clear!!!

                    #10 abbypoo

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                      Posted 30 December 2009 - 10:41 AM

                      I have heard the best way to make it clear is to list both of their names, but also include an RSVP where they can write in _ of 2 (or whatever number you put) guests will be joining. I think this makes it CLEAR that you are only inviting two people, who names you've already written.




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