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Guest assumes they can bring someone

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#61 dayna_123

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    Posted 12 March 2010 - 08:10 PM

    I never really thought of that, My sister is MOH and invited a few of her close friends. I really found no problem with it. The more the merrier! The wedding is only one day, its going to be a good week!

    #62 Tennyt1

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      Posted 12 March 2010 - 08:21 PM

      Only the single folks are bring guest..their dates. The others are invited as couples

      ~April 2, 2011 ~ Sandals Grand Ocho Rios ~
      ~52 Guest booked plus the Bride & Groom~

      #63 lalanyc

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        Posted 12 March 2010 - 09:53 PM


        I had several relatives who, after receiving the details about the wedding date and location, started inviting their co-workers, friends, neighbors, you name it!!

        Once I got wind, I immediately prepared a polite but firm email explaining to them that, as much as we love their friends, that we could not afford to have the additional guests and that we would not be in a position to decide about whether we could invite more guests until we received our RSVPs (polite way of saying NEVER).

        THEN, once word got out that they were thinking of inviting friends and not having them attend our wedding, I commented through other friends and family that we would feel compelled to invite these people anyway b/c how awkward is it to have them so close by and not have them at the wedding?? Thus, it would put us in an uncomfortable position.

        Finally, once people suggested paying for their friends (my family is very persistent), we pointed out that if we did this, other people may want to do this and we would lose control of our guest list.

        They are STILL trying to figure out ways to bring friends but so far my explanations have been sufficient. Another point I've been making is that we want a destination wedding so we can have time w/ our guests. Clearly if they bring their friends, that would defeat the purpose.

        hope this helps!

        #64 IrishgirlinNY

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          Posted 13 March 2010 - 02:56 AM

          Lalanyc, that is exactly the point that I am trying to make to everyone. We are doing a destination wedding to keep it a small, private wedding with close friends and family (probably 30-35 people). I am just afraid with all these other people, it will not be what I had in mind of having a DW for in the first place. Think I am going to have to try some of your reasoning. It is also my FMIL, which is a situation that my fiance is going to have to tackle.. just wanted some tips to help him out. Thanks to everyone for their help!

          #65 chipotle99

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            Posted 13 March 2010 - 11:48 PM

            oh gosh! I didn't even think of this possibility!

            #66 ablj209

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              Posted 16 March 2010 - 10:34 AM

              So far, I have only 1 uninvited guest. My MOH's mother has invited herself to Punta Cana. As she explains, it's a public resort, anyone can go at any time. This is fine, however, we have informed her that she will not be participating in any of the wedding events. She will not attend the sunset dinner cruise the night before the wedding, there will not be a chair for her at the ceremony or the semi-private reception. As for the rest of the week, if she wants to hang out with her daughter and the rest of us, then that's okay!

              #67 vlynnw

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                Posted 16 March 2010 - 10:47 AM

                I haven't thought about this. However, there is no way I'm allowing my guests to invite more guests. My FI already invited more people than I want to be at my wedding! I would have to in a polite fashion tell my guests that they are not invited to the wedding, if they want to go to the resort at that time it's fine, but they would not be included on my guests list or be invited to anything related to the wedding. That may be harsh but it's my wedding and you have to remember that it's what you want, not what they want.
                Veronica & Adam - May 6, 2011 - Dreams Tulum

                #68 josietoms

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                  Posted 16 March 2010 - 12:09 PM

                  none of our guests have gone down this route i am pleased to say. We do have one single friend coming who is my MOH; she doesnt have a partner and another friend who she was going to share with has dropped out so she asked if her mum could come instead which we agreed to due to the rooms being based on 2 sharing and we know her mum (sort of). But i think it is rude to invite others and i would have to say something if any of our guests started doing this. Just dont invite any of your friends friends to the wedding; this is your day. I mean would they invite someone to your wedding venue if you werent having a DW!
                  Josie x

                  #69 Snickers

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                  • 193 posts

                    Posted 16 March 2010 - 12:51 PM

                    Originally Posted by Princess402
                    We have had a couple of our guests ask if it would be okay if friends of theirs, etc, came along to Mexico as well. I hope not too many people do this (and I don't think there will be) because then everyone is going to be going off with their own group of friends during the week, and not doing things "together" as we are hoping. I really want all our guests to get to know each other and have fun together the whole week! But you can't stop people from going on vacation at the same time/place you are. So for anyone that's asked we have said that it's fine for their friends to come to Mexico of course (and actually it's more than fine cause we're getting every 6th room free, so if they book with our group then it's potentially more $$ back for us!), but that unfortunately there is an additional cost per person associated with coming to the wedding and so they wouldn't be able to come to the actual wedding and reception. I think that seems reasonable and everyone has been fine with that!
                    We have decided to go this same route as well by not having them at our reception. But I think there are only a couple of extra people coming so it should not be a huge issue.

                    #70 Tennyt1

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                      Posted 17 March 2010 - 04:50 PM

                      I had to struggle to limit FI to our list of 60 guest. If they were to bring extra people I would be extreamly upset and have to go bridezilla on them and call security. LOL.

                      ~April 2, 2011 ~ Sandals Grand Ocho Rios ~
                      ~52 Guest booked plus the Bride & Groom~

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