I totally understand. My fiancee's best friend's fiancee drives me, and everyone else who knows her, nuts! I cannot imagine spending more than a couple of hours with her, let alone a whole week. However her fiancee is a GM so there is no way around it. She has to be invited. I just hope to put as many people between us as a buffer as possible. I have heard a rumour that she won't have enough vacation days to come. Lets hope so.
I think most people would understand that a really big engagement party does not necessarily mean an invite, especially to a destination wedding, if you aren't close. Perhaps you can invite her to your AHR if you're having one? Then it would only be a couple of hours. One thing I've noticed is that people always get excited about the idea of going away, especially when drinking. But when they start budgeting time and money they will start to have reservations and won't even be able to come.
What to do about guests who assume they are invited?
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