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Jo 2010

Random thoughts from 20-30 Year olds :)

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Hi Ladies...


I just got this via email and I thought it was really funny...


Random thoughts from people 20-35 years old


- More often than not, when someone is telling me a story all I can think

about is that I can't wait for them to finish so that I can tell my own

story that's not only better, but also more directly involves me.


- Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realise

you're wrong.


- I don't understand the purpose of the line, "I don't need to drink to

have fun." Great, no one does. But why start a fire with flint and sticks

when they've invented the lighter?


- Have you ever been walking down the street and realised that you're going

in the complete opposite direction of where you are supposed to be going?

But instead of just turning a 180 and walking back in the direction from

which you came, you have to first do something like check your watch or

phone or make a grand arm gesture and mutter to yourself to ensure that no

one in the surrounding area thinks you're crazy by randomly switching

directions on the sidewalk.


- I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was



- Is it just me, or are 80% of the people in the "people you may know"

feature on Facebook people that I do know, but I deliberately choose not to

be friends with?


- Do you remember when you were a kid, playing Nintendo and it wouldn't

work? You take the cartridge out, blow in it and that would magically fix

the problem. Every kid did that, but how did we all know how to fix the

problem? There was no internet or message boards or FAQ's. We just figured

it out. Today's kids are soft.


- There is a great need for sarcasm font.


- Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and

suddenly realise I had no idea what the f*** was going on when I first saw



- I think everyone has a movie that they love so much, it actually becomes

stressful to watch it with other people. I'll end up wasting 90 minutes

shiftily glancing around to confirm that everyone's laughing at the right

parts, then making sure I laugh just a little bit harder (and a millisecond

earlier) to prove that I'm still the only one who really, really gets it.


- How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?


- I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than

take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.


- I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your

computer history if you die.


- LOL has gone from meaning, "laugh out loud" to "I have nothing else to



- I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.


- Whenever someone says "I'm not book smart, but I'm street smart", all I

hear is "I'm not real smart, but I'm imaginary smart".


- How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and

smile because you still didn't hear what they said?


- I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars teams up to

prevent a dick from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers!


- Every time I have to spell a word over the phone using 'as in' examples,

I will undoubtedly draw a blank and sound like a complete idiot. Today I

had to spell my boss's last name to an attorney and said "Yes that's G as

in...(10 second lapse)..ummm...Goonies".


- What would happen if I hired two private investigators to follow each



- While driving yesterday I saw a banana peel in the road and instinctively

swerved to avoid it...thanks Mario Kart.


- Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the

person died.


- I find it hard to believe there are actually people who get in the shower

first and THEN turn on the water.


- Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and

you can wear them forever.


- I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.


- Bad decisions make good stories.


- Whenever I'm Facebook stalking someone and I find out that their profile

is public, I feel like a kid on Christmas morning that just got the Red

Ryder BB gun that I always wanted. 546 pictures? Don't mind if I do!


- Is it just me or do high school girls get slu.ttier & slut.tier every year?



- If Carmen San Diego and Waldo ever got together, their offspring would

probably just be completely invisible.


- Why is it that during an ice-breaker, when the whole room has to go

around and say their name and where they are from, I get so incredibly

nervous? Like I know my name, I know where I'm from, this shouldn't be a

problem …


- You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when

you've made up your mind that you just aren't doing anything productive for

the rest of the day.


- Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after DVDs? I don't want

to have to restart my collection.


- There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going

to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.


- I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I

want to save any changes to my ten page research paper that I swear I did

not make any changes to.


- "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this ever.


- I hate being the one with the remote in a room full of people watching

TV. There's so much pressure. 'I love this show, but will they judge me if

I keep it on? I bet everyone is wishing we weren't watching this. It's only

a matter of time before they all get up and leave the room. Will we still

be friends after this?'


- I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Dammit!),

but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to

voicemail. What'd you do after I didn't answer? Throw the phone and run

away in the opposite direction?


- I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing

anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.


- When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't

already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.


- I like all of the music in my iTunes, except when it's on shuffle, then I

like about one in every fifteen songs in my iTunes.


- Why is a school zone 25 km/h? That seems like the optimal cruising speed

for paedophiles...


- As a driver I hate pedestrians and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no

matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.


- Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not

know what time it is.


- I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to

answer when they call.


- Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys

in a pocket, hitting the G-spot, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but

I'd bet my a$s everyone can find and push the Snooze button from 3 feet

away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time every time...


- My 4-year old son asked me in the car the other day "Dad what would

happen if you ran over a ninja?" How the hell do I respond to that?


- I wonder if cops ever get pi$sed off at the fact that everyone they drive

behind obeys the speed limit.


- I think the freezer deserves a light as well.


- The other night I ordered take away and when I looked in the bag, saw

they had included four sets of plastic cutlery. In other words, someone at

the restaurant packed my order, took a second to think about it, and then

estimated that there must be at least four people eating to require such a

large amount of food. Too bad I was eating by myself. There's nothing like

being made to feel like a fat ba$tard before dinner.

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Bahahahaha! I'm turning 29 this week and I really did laugh out loud in my cube while reading this. Thanks for making me chuckle!

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I got this in an email a few days ago! I loved it! It's all so true! Especially the moment at work when you decide you are no longer going to be productive...like....now. :)

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