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"You finally got rid of your fiance?"


karenk77
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Ok so this one is a doosy and I dont know what to do.

1st I have to give some backround info before i get to my question to bear with me please, and also know that I am not a girl that gets involved in drama at ALL! I hate this stuff I usually avoid it but this is weird :)

 

I am currently going for my masters, and a few months back I had a paper due that was like 160+ pages..when i was done i posted my facebook status as free at last, free at last! well...one of my friends(she considers herself one but i havent spoken to her in forever) wrote what happened ?you finally got rid of your fiance? I was soooooo pissed. Besides the fact that she has never met him in the 3 yrs weve been together hes probably the kindest person in the entire world and to say that without knowing him especially publically on facebook is retarted. So he reads this and gets upset and was like what did you tell her, are u trying to get rid of me? he was so upset..because he really thought i had said soemthing to her. So i wrote her some unpleasantries and kind of forgot about her after that.

 

At the time one of my actual close friends who does know her casually through me and knows my fiance very well wrote all these things about him saying hes the best thing in her life bla bla..and she told me i should drop the girl..i said im not in kindergarden...nothing to drop she wasnt in my life wasnt going to be, stop writing things on facebook because i dont care what she thinks and i dont want this drama.

 

fastforward to last night..i am online and the girl who originally wrote the you got rid of him, im's me and says oh congrats i heard you set the date i heard its in DR congrats...i was shocked because i never told her, never wrote anything on facebook, she doesnt have any mutual friends with me(or so i thought) and had no idea how she knew..so she proceeds to tell me that she spoke on the phone to my friend(the one who stood up for me when it was written) and that she had told her..so apparently they are friends. She proceeds to tell me that im gonna make such a beautiful bride and its going to be so beautiful, and she would love to see me as a bride..all these things..actually had the balls to ask how much its going to cost and all this other stuff. I was angry at my friend like why would you tell her that, what business is it of yours too share and puts me in an akward position now because I had no intention of inviting her..does this mean i have to??

 

Oh and by the way..the close friend of mine is one that i have been through everything in the world with her(4 bachelorette parties this girl had i went to all, the night she got engaged i ran out of bed when i was sleeping to go meet them & congratulate them, the day she gave birth i left work and ran to the hospital) when she found out about our wedding she said "ill see what i can do if i come or not" lol.

 

I love ittt!!!!

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first of all, i'm so sorry your poor FI thought it was a serious comment. he must have been so hurt. what an ass this girl is for posting that. i can only hope she was just trying to be funny?

 

but seeing all the drama it caused, the other friend should have NEVER divulged details of your wedding to this chick. (and NO, you shouldn't invite her. you never *have to* invite anyone. invite the people who are meaningful to you and leave it at that).

 

as for your actual close friend ... "i'll see what i can do" would have made me cringe knowing i had done so much for her (not that you should keep track or anything ... i have an ex-friend who used to tally up her good deeds and seem to conveniently forget everything i ever did for her, lol). anyway i want to believe this chick isn't just selfish and actually just meant financially or because of her kid or whatever?

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He was really hurt..but i told him shes a moron and explained to him how females are to one another..she tried to play it off like it was a joke..but you dont know him to joke like that u know what i mean??

 

As for my close friend..omg we both cringed as she said it..because it was at another wedding we were at last week when my fiance said to her you guys are def going to come right? and so she had said that..i understand perfectly if its a financial circumstance (although i dont think it is) but even so..come to me and say listen i love you i would love to be there but we just cant swing it and i would understand completely..but to say it like that was more like f*ck off i dont know right now (oh and by the way my fiance left work too out of respect for me and came to the hospital the day she gave birth too) which was 2yrs ago and so at that time he didnt know her as well as he does today obviously

i was just disgusted.

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and no i dont do things ever with any intention other then its what i want to do..but you also do it with hopes that one day when its your turn it'll be somehow recipricated in some way..but i dont want to be the salvation army either keep doing things doing things and then get told ill see what i can do at the end lol

 

BTW Congrats on MOTM!!!!! Go girl!!!!

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I agree with Lisa, you do NOT have to invite this girl who was practically trying to pull an invite out of you by the sounds of it. Who the hell does that?! Yeesh!

 

As for your other friend, I really hope she pulls through for you at the end of the day. Maybe she was busy or rushed or had other things on her mind when she said she could see what she would do? I dunno, just thinking out loud. Anyway, best of luck with your wedding planning. This forum is such a treasure for all brides, past and future AND the Dominican Republic is a gorgeous place to have your wedding, I'm confident it will be an amazing day for you! :)

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Okay Karenk77...my gosh so sorry you have had to deal with all this nonsense. I also feel like we have the same friends...LOL. It is a damn shame you even have to go through all of this and as for the girl that you have gone out of your way to help...she needs to appreciate you as a friend. Like you said if it is financals that can not allow them to come that is completely understandable...but still being short with you about is not the way to inform you. As far as the other girl....DON'T INVITE HER...next thing you know she will have your wedding pics posted on her facebook without your approval...who posts something like that on your wall...DUH that is what they made private messages for!!!!

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WTFlyingF. What kind of Facken Balls does this girl have. She in know way needs to know what is going on in your life and obviously try and pry it out of you that you will invite her cause that is how it sounded. You really need to talk to your "friend" who seems to blowing crap off. NOT COOL! *hugs*

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aww thanks guys you made me feel better..ok so im not going to invite her..as for my other friend..im not going to confront her..im not gonna say a word, you know i have been through this so many times with friends because even though i can make friends with anyone because im that person that can makes friends with a rock im overly friendly but I keep very few people close to me and the ones i do I will do anything at anytime for, and have. I dont know how to be half way w.me its you get all of me or nothing..so I am not going to say anything because I have gone above and beyond for her, im gonna just sit back and watch her actions..shes the one thats in the wrong and i dont care to prove a point or salvage anything because I see how shes acting since we set the date..so rather then create drama by telling her, having her explain oh i was just telling her how great you're doing(which im sure will be her excuse) it'll get escalated and honestly not worth it to me. I dont care that much. I was pissed that night when she said ill see what i can do..and even her husband said soemthing to the same effect to my fiance..we left both said F them..actually im lying bcuz then we went to a bday of their family still to be the better people and she didnt say a WORD to us..so im done. maybe i will text her saying if your gonna tell people about my life gimme a heads up so i know who knows my business and who doesnt. hey i guess im more important then i thought lol

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