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Our "first" fight over wedding projects

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28 replies to this topic

#1 emme

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  • 382 posts

    Posted 26 August 2009 - 11:51 AM

    I just really need to share...

    I have been spending endless hours on wedding planning and many DIY projects. All of which I love because I am "that girl" and wouldn't have it any other way. No complaints.

    Although my FI has been watching me as I go along with all of this...I don't think he was really aware of how much I had on the go until now...because it's done and all ready to be put together.

    SO...now he is excited and ready to be involved which is wonderful...or so I thought!!

    In my head...I've always had a "plan" of how things need to go...and I do admit that I am fairly stubborn. Since I've been doing this by myself for months...my stubborness doesn't seem like it would be a problem. Enter FI...

    Last week he starts folding our Spanish guides...does about 5 (out of 30) and decides that is enough for him for the day. Two nights ago he starts putting luggage tags together complete with the inserts and straps...but needs to take a few breaks because "its alot of work". He also helped to do the stickers on the bubbles but made his and hers piles...so when he was done his pile...he was done...no helping with my pile. Last night he helps me cut out our boarding pass invitations and once again when he was done (but I wasn't done my pile yet)...that was it..."lets go" and "hurry" because we were on our way out for supper. All along he has been making comments such as "Wow...ok that's 2 hours of time that I've put into wedding crap now"...like he's making a tally of the hours and minutes he's contributed.

    So...fast forward 3 hours...and now we're putting piles together of what needs to go into each persons OOT bag. I have ponytails of all different sizes and I seperate them into piles because I also know that I think I'm going to be short of the big thick ones...therefore they need to be given to the people with long thick hair...(I know, totally anal). FI says to put all the piles together and just start dropping a bunch in each OOT bag pile (totally NOT anal). I say no because they've gotta be done this way (with brief explanation). He gives it about a minute...then gets up and says "don't ask me to help out with any more wedding stuff EVER again"...and he's mad!

    I know he sounds like such an a**...LOL...and he's really not...and I truly appreciate his help and the fact that he even wants to help...but man he is gettin' on my last nerve about all of this stuff!!!

    Everything worked out...because an hour later we had our "talk" and he expressed that "my way" is not always the right way...LOL...so really I know that the issue wasn't the ponytails :)

    OMG...fighting over ponytails!!! Can you believe it

    Bride + Groom + 44 Amazing Guests...

    #2 ~Keira~

    • Sr. Member
    • 1,338 posts

      Posted 26 August 2009 - 12:00 PM

      Oh dear. I hear ya. Last night my Steven said something about me not letting him make any decissions. Where the heck did that come from? He hasn't said BOO since we started planning but apparently I don't take his ideas seriously.

      Meh, way I look at it is he just wants to put his 2 cents in so it looks like he's interested. At least you've got your beau helping out.

      I say give him a high five, let him put what he wants in the OOT bag and then you can fix it the way you like when he goes out. lol
      ~Keira~**formerly KLee147**


      #3 emme

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        Posted 26 August 2009 - 12:04 PM

        LOL!!! Good point...I can always fix it after the fact...that's hilarious and a great idea :)

        Bride + Groom + 44 Amazing Guests...

        #4 marryinghimagain

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          Posted 26 August 2009 - 12:09 PM

          They just don't get it! I agree with KLee147, I would sooo totally do that, just fix them when he isn't around.

          #5 ~Keira~

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            Posted 26 August 2009 - 12:09 PM

            Trust me, I've avoided many-a-petty arguments by doing just that. Men are so silly and women we rule the earth.
            ~Keira~**formerly KLee147**


            #6 autjo

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              Posted 26 August 2009 - 12:11 PM

              Aw sweety, boys just don't get us. They never will They also have ADD regardless of what they say. Mine and FI's first wedding fight was over the groomsmen flip flops. He seriously threw a hissy hit over them - total groom-zilla moment. I love the idea of letting him do stuff and then going back and fixing it (I do it all the time and FI never even realizes it).

              Oh yeah - sometimes the perfection that we see and want isn't really necessary. I know thats a crazy concept because I am OCD, but when FI helps and the stuff doesn't turn out to that perfect .025 inch it is totaly worth the time we spent together working on the project :o)

              #7 shellk

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                Posted 26 August 2009 - 01:09 PM

                i totally understand. we are only having a small dw so i have no oot bags or diy stuff to do.but my fi is just starting to voice his opinion and asking whats happening.im just like hold on a mo you not got involved until now.its when they can see things are nearly done they want to get involved so they can say they did it also

                #8 karenk77

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                • 369 posts

                  Posted 26 August 2009 - 03:34 PM

                  You should be happy its only your first considering how much you have gotten done. We had our first on our first day of planning altogether..so consider yourself lucky lol
                  They are nuts plain & simple..a whole other species that should come with an instruction manual

                  #9 vlynnw

                  • Sr. Member
                  • 6,003 posts

                    Posted 26 August 2009 - 03:44 PM

                    Men just don't always get it, they aren't as detail oriented as we are when it comes to things -especially wedding things! We haven't gotten to those fights yet but we are already bickering over an AHR because he wants one, I don't. If we have it I want it at my parents palce, he doesn't We just keep going around in circles. Just remember that he is trying to help, and as mentioned let him do something then fix it when he's gone!
                    Veronica & Adam - May 6, 2011 - Dreams Tulum

                    #10 BachataBride

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                      Posted 26 August 2009 - 03:53 PM

                      OMG Emme!! That totally sounds like DH and I!!! We cannot do ANYTHING together without a "fight"! Apparently everything I do is ANAL, and his way is always RIGHT! I wish he would just come to the realization that while I may be a little anal I AM ALWAYS RIGHT!!! lol

                      Glad that everything worked out though!

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