"stop bugging me about your wedding"
Posted 21 August 2009 - 02:15 PM
Posted 21 August 2009 - 03:47 PM
Posted 21 August 2009 - 03:50 PM
I spoke with her again (msn'd, lol) and I asked her why she thought I was bugging her about the wedding. I hardly mention it! I told her I'm nothing compared to some brides! I'm not asking her to spend $900 on a bridesmaid dress!
She's never been a bridesmaid before so she doesn't realize there are costs involved. She reeeallly wanted to be my BM so I had no problem with it, now it's this "last minute decision" bs...
thanks for letting me vent. hugs to you all.
Posted 21 August 2009 - 04:05 PM
Posted 21 August 2009 - 04:40 PM
Posted 21 August 2009 - 04:56 PM
I had to schedule our dress fitting around her schedule for her and my sisters. Then came the bachelorette party discussions and she was being difficult with the scheduling and costs. She also asked if I had a backup plan in case the violence was too bad in Cancun at the time of the wedding....major Debbie Downer. In the end she's going to the wedding but not as my MOH and unfortunately it created a lot of unnecessary stress and issues with my mom and my sisters.
If you think she'll end up like this my advice is to cut her out of the wedding now and if she comes to the wedding great, if not don't sweat it. Focus on everyone else that's excited about going and how much fun you're going to have!!
Posted 21 August 2009 - 05:09 PM
Posted 21 August 2009 - 11:28 PM
Please don't take offense, but whenever I read situations like this, it reminds me why I decided NOT to have any bridesmaids. That way, no one feels obligated to go if they can't afford it. And with the economy being such a mess right now, I didn't think it would be fair of me to ask them to be in my wedding especially since my FI and I aren't/can't afford to cover their travel expenses. Bridesmaids = drama in my book!
I say if she can't afford to go, let her be excused from the wedding, and try not to take it personally if at all possible. I know it puts you in a bad spot, but would you want her there if she was pouting and complaining the whole time anyway if she DID go? I think that would be worse than her missing it, for sure!
And my theory is that she is probably acting hostile because she is jealous about your wedding and all of the neat plans you have, plus she's also probably embarrassed that they are having financial issues at all (more of less no money for their wedding, so it inevitable will not be as cool as yours in the end).
She's behaving like a little kid who's pouting because her best friend just a got a toy that is better than hers, so now she doesn't want to play at all, am I right?! Try to remain calm, and tell her it's okay to step down and that you hope her finances turn back around soon.
Posted 22 August 2009 - 12:23 PM
last night I get a "oh so u set the date..well i'll see what i can do", in the coldest most non give a F way possible.
Thats why i also am not having a bridal party..moh & bm..family and thats it.
Posted 25 August 2009 - 09:21 PM
| Originally Posted by karenk77 |
She doesnt realize the cost? ok maybe if she wasnt planning her OWN wedding! But she is..and she knows. Maybe she is jealous..whatever her problem is it shouldnt become yours..this is your time and don't let her lack of sensitivity ruin it for you. ..and as for the having to spend $900 bridesmaid dress comment? THAT WAS ME!!! LOL.
My FI thinks she's jealous, and that could very well be...I think that anything regarding $$ right now is a verrrrry touchy subject. And I told her I just want this wedding to be fun and stress-free, for EVERYONE involved. Am I asking the impossible?
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