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So my sister just got engaged, 3 months after I did :l


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#31 rpingree001

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    Posted 21 June 2010 - 10:00 PM

    I am going through a slightly similar experience myself only its my fiance's sister. She got engaged 2 months after us to someone she had been dating for 6 weeks and now she's getting married 4 months before us. My fiance told her that he felt this was wrong and his parents asked that they take more time, but she'll have none of that. We both know its the attention that is driving her as she's always been an "its an all about me" kind of person. I've tried to explain that she should not only wait to enjoy the dating and engagement period with her boyfriend / fiance but also to enjoy the whole being a bride experience. Rushing into it just to be first - only robs her of all the attention she could be getting for longer. In the end, I think she will be really disappointed that she didn't take her time both with the experience and getting to know her fiance.

    Good luck with your sister!! I'm frustrated with the sister-in-law, I can only imagine if it was my actual sister. Its almost your time and you can make it a truly unique experience for your guests (very different from your sisters) and a lifetime of memories for you and your fi.

    #32 jajajaja

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      Posted 22 June 2010 - 01:00 AM

      Sorry it's been such a rough go around. I think it's always important to be honest and let others know how you feel rather than bottling up because when it comes out bubbling out, it will be toxic! It sounds like you guys had a good discussion so hopefully your sister took your words to heart and try to improve her behavior post-wedding. Nothing she can really do at this point because what's done is done.

      However, I do hope you don't harbor too much resentment over it all. While your wedding is very important (the marriage more so), your relationship with your sister is extremely important. You will soon forget all the drama from the wedding and possibly chuckle about it together a few years from now. So while it sucks, try to keep it in perspective. Stay positive. I really hope things improve for you in the next 5 months and you really get your chance to shine. :)

      (PS- I was married a few days before my mom's 50th bday and I never thought how I might have stolen her spotlight. LOL Maybe I should apologize.... but then again, she probably wanted to forget that she was turning 50!)
      Happily married since 2008

      #33 Mrs Price 2010

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        Posted 22 June 2010 - 11:26 AM

        Great thread! Going through a similar experience with my BF and advise has been great!

        I got engaged and booked my wedding within a month - quick I know, but we always knew what we would want to do. 2 months later BF gets engaged and says she's getting married in 2011 - great after mine and we get to share the experience together, she's having a big white home wedding, so different weddings to!
        However 2 months later she says she's getting married in 2010 - as she's a school teacher it needs to be between July and August (UK holidays!), so not only did she bump her wedding up a year - also 2 months before we fly to Mexico for our wedding! At this point I'm a little annoyed, but still excited for her! Even though I had to plan my hen weekend around her and her honeymoon!
        But then she asks me to be her MOH - Over the moon, until I start thinking about all the things I will need to do for her, whilst planning my wedding - I have no BM or MOH, so it's all on me. So after a few months of thinking I had to tell her no - lots of tears from me, feel as if I am letting my BF down, but I just would not be able to have the time to dedicate to her 100%.
        I'm glad I was honest with her from the start and looking on the brightside I've had lots of ideas of what to do - or rather not what to do on my hen weekend, at my wedding and AHR!

        #34 breeze616

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          Posted 22 June 2010 - 04:40 PM

          Thanks ladies for your support.

          FYI, my sister has already sent me emails with centerpiece ideas and some ideas that I mentioned I was considering for my bachlorette. So things are much better. I really just wish I would've been honest in the first place and not caused the stress between us, which is why I have shared this experience with you ladies. I'm sure everything will work out between us, we've always been close and we always will be.

          #35 breeze616

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            Posted 09 July 2010 - 07:50 PM

            *Update*

            So my sisters wedding is done as of last weekend. It was sooo much fun.

            Guess what? Some of my family members who said they couldn't come to mine, had so much fun at her wedding, they said they really want to come! Bonus!!

            Plus, now that the air is cleared between us, she has been super-helpful, caring and attentive. Even the relationship between my new brother-in-law and my Fi has improved.

            So all-in-all everything is A-ok :)

            Thanks everyone for the support, I will be back!!

            #36 sunkisseddreams

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              Posted 10 July 2010 - 03:40 PM

              Yay! So glad it worked out in the end Sabrina
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              #37 bsf&jpg

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                Posted 12 July 2010 - 06:17 PM

                Quote:
                Originally Posted by breeze616
                *Update*

                So my sisters wedding is done as of last weekend. It was sooo much fun.

                Guess what? Some of my family members who said they couldn't come to mine, had so much fun at her wedding, they said they really want to come! Bonus!!

                Plus, now that the air is cleared between us, she has been super-helpful, caring and attentive. Even the relationship between my new brother-in-law and my Fi has improved.

                So all-in-all everything is A-ok :)

                Thanks everyone for the support, I will be back!!
                YAYAYAYAY!!!!!!!!! focus back on YOU!!!!! woohoo!!!!!!!!!
                you really have been a great sport. and glad you did finally clear the air.
                best wishes!

                #38 msglave

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                  Posted 12 July 2010 - 11:01 PM

                  I'm glad everything worked out for the best!
                  The Royal Playa del Carmen 12.11.10 / 46 people + bride & groom attended!!!!!
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                  #39 JanineA

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                    Posted 12 July 2010 - 11:10 PM

                    Quote:
                    Originally Posted by breeze616
                    *Update*

                    So my sisters wedding is done as of last weekend. It was sooo much fun.

                    Guess what? Some of my family members who said they couldn't come to mine, had so much fun at her wedding, they said they really want to come! Bonus!!

                    Plus, now that the air is cleared between us, she has been super-helpful, caring and attentive. Even the relationship between my new brother-in-law and my Fi has improved.

                    So all-in-all everything is A-ok :)

                    Thanks everyone for the support, I will be back!!
                    Yaaay Sabrina!! So glad to hear everything is A-ok and so glad you posted this thread as it seems many other ladies are going through similar experiences and can learn from yours.

                    #40 jeanward

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                      Posted 20 October 2010 - 06:53 AM

                      Hello. You are getting married on my son's birthday! I just had the same experience you did. I got engaged in August, and my younger sister just got engaged a couple days ago. She hasn't made any plans yet, so I don't know if they are going to get married before me or not. I had the same first thought that you did, "I wish they would have waited until I was married so they didn't steal my thunder". Then I thought about it some more and figured her fiance probably had this planned before we got engaged. It takes some time to save up for a ring and pick one out. I am going to pick out all the positives and ignore my first selfish thoughts. They have been together the same amount of time as me and my fiance, it is time for them too. I want her to feel that I am 100% happy for her, because I am and she deserves it. Don't you hate selfish thoughts...no matter how fleeting??






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