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How many bm is too many?

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#1 slapsappyhappy

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    Posted 30 July 2009 - 06:43 PM


    I recently got "officially" engaged and in the excitement I asked my friends to be my bridesmaids without doing the cutesy things on here (like the card saying "will you be my bridesmaid?" etc...) Anyway I am up to 8- my sis, future sister in law, sister in law, 2 cousins, 3 of my BFF's, and 2 jr bridesmaids (future niece and cousin)

    I have one more friend who told me she might not be able to make it because of the $,and lives on the other side of the country, but I wanted her in my bridal party. I also have a friend in another country who I am pretty close to but probably not close enough to have her in my bridal party, and she wont be able to come to the bachelorette party or the shower, but if I do not have her in it she will get very upset.

    So what should I do? I wish I had either limited it to immediate family or scrapped the idea of bridesmaids altogether... is 10 too many or the more the merrier? Thanks!

    #2 AJandNate2010

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      Posted 30 July 2009 - 06:48 PM

      I have 5 maids and a flower girl and my fiance has 7 groomsmen. I think you have a lot of family involved so it's kind of hard to take away that piece. I think 10 is too much if you are having 30 guest attend. It's only weird when there are more people standing at the alter than in the chairs :)

      Final guest count... 63 adults and 10 kids!!

      #3 *Lo*

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        Posted 30 July 2009 - 07:00 PM

        I only think it is too many if you are having a small wedding. When the majority of the wedding is IN the wedding it's a bit awkward in my opinion.

        Other than that, if it's important to you to have the people you mentioned in the bridal party then go for it!!! It should be about what you want.

        #4 ~Nicole~

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          Posted 31 July 2009 - 02:08 PM

          I guess it depends on how complicated you want to make things for yourself lol. It may sound like a good idea to have all of those people now, but just think trying to organize the attire, etc. That's a lot of opinions. I've found through experience that smaller WP's generally have less drama because its easier to communicate with each other. But, if you feel that strongly about it and don't forsee those problems then I say go for it.

          I sort of agree with Lori on the size of your guest list though. That's something I'm worrying about myself..... I have a MOH and 2 BMs and FI has a BM and one GM. Well, it turns out that we only have 10 of us in total going.... so that leaves a whole 3 people as guests that are not in the wedding party. I am really worried about that. I'm hoping that I won't notice the day of, but I'm deathly afraid that it will feel wierd or look funny in pics.
          Good luck and let us know what you decide!
          *Formerly Nikki07*
          My Planning Thread

          #5 Jess

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            Posted 31 July 2009 - 03:10 PM

            Well I'm a 10 bridesmaid bride and I agree with Lori - its only too many if you have close to the same amount in the wedding as those who are attending the wedding.

            We have about 80 coming to the wedding...and while our wedding party does make up 25% of our guests (10 bm and 10 gm)...I'm hoping it works out alright. I just couldn't leave people out - I felt too bad

            #6 NaM

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              Posted 31 July 2009 - 03:37 PM

              My FI and I each have 7 and although I love them all life would be a bit easier if we had less. There are so many opinions on outfits, flowers, parties, etc. But it is so fun and I couldn't imagine leaving anyone out!!
              Do you want to get them all gifts? If you were thinking of something nice, 10 could get expensive so make sure it's within your budget.
              Good luck and remember to do whatever will make YOU happy!!

              #7 KLaBate54

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                Posted 31 July 2009 - 03:43 PM

                I have 9 BM's and definitely don't feel that it's too many! The only hard part is getting everyone together at the same time for dress shopping (which I ended taking groups at separate times) and then buying gifts for all of them. Of course I want to get them a really great gift because they're traveling all the way to Mexico for our wedding, but I also can't afford anything TOO great. I actually decided to do really big OOT bags for all of them and found a lot of stuff on sale since it's the end of summer.

                I say if you want 10, then go for it!

                #8 angruck

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                  Posted 01 August 2009 - 02:33 PM

                  i went with simple is better but i do have more bm then there are groomsmen
                  Angela & Chris

                  #9 ashey063009

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                    Posted 01 August 2009 - 02:38 PM

                    It's your wedding. You decide. What may be too many to one bride may be too little to another. The only one that really knows is you! :)

                    #10 slapsappyhappy

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                      Posted 03 August 2009 - 02:08 PM

                      thanks for your thoughts, I feel much better! I have to iron out the guest list, but I already asked 8 people so 2 more won't matter. I feel better knowing that I am not the only one with a big bridal party!

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