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on the edge of a breakdown

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17 replies to this topic

#11 sita

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  • 21 posts

    Posted 29 July 2009 - 07:35 PM

    My heart goes out to you and all the difficulty you have experienced! All I can say is that I feel the strongest people are given the most challenging situations, and we can't acknowledge the brightest of light until we experience the darkest of darks. Good things are in store for you, and they will be so much sweeter because of your past!!

    #12 Geralyn

    • Sr. Member
    • 2,677 posts

      Posted 30 July 2009 - 12:36 AM

      Just remember ...everything happens for a reason...everything has a way of working themselves out

      #13 ~*Kathy*~

      • Sr. Member
      • 5,649 posts

        Posted 30 July 2009 - 01:41 AM

        I know this has already been said by the other ladies but...wow! I am so very sorry to hear about all of the awful things you have had to deal with over the course of the last 5 years. I don't have any particular advice to offer other than the BDW ladies are always here for you even if you just want to vent. I really hope things start to look up for you soon!

        #14 tdmitchell

        • Member
        • 719 posts

          Posted 30 July 2009 - 02:06 AM

          #15 IslamoradaBride

          • Jr. Member
          • 459 posts

            Posted 30 July 2009 - 12:10 PM

            Oh sweetie, you have shouldered so much in the last five years. You are so strong!

            Though I haven't been through your exact situation, I have been in a similar place and I can't recommend counseling enough. You are coming off a string of tragedies that most don't see in a lifetime, much less two years. Whether you go to a grief support group, individual counseling or a weight loss support group, I think you could really benefit from taking time to process what's happened in your life.

            I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but it alarms me a little that your FI wants to rip you away from your family home. Especially after all you have been through. I don't know, it just seems like he should be supporting you, not forcing you to do something you don't want to do. Plus you seem to jump from relationship to relationship without really thinking things through (again, not judging, I have so been there) and I think you need to take a step back before you get married and move away.

            #16 The Mandy in Chandy

            The Mandy in Chandy
            • Jr. Member
            • 307 posts

              Posted 30 July 2009 - 12:36 PM

              IslamoradaBride- I know what you mean about me jumping from relationship to relationship, but I did take some time off between my ex and my fiance, so I am not worried about him being a rebound or anything. he's a good guy, and he will stay in SC with me if I want- I just have to say the word. But it makes more sense to go there with him- I am not close to my family and he is close to his. I am not tied down to a lifelong career here and he is about to start his. it's just scary- I think it'll be good for me. I've held onto these material things for so long thinking it would bring me security. It's just a house. My home is wherever he will be. He's very good to me, I don't doubt my decision to marry him, but I can't help but be scared, naturally- when this is all I have known.

              Thank you all again for your support, I know I am going to be ok. FH left today and when I get home I'll face the house alone for the first time. I don't know what is going to happen but I know whatever it is- a good cry or just another ho-hum day- I'll be just fine

              #17 koolatta

              • Jr. Member
              • 321 posts

                Posted 30 July 2009 - 12:50 PM

                I just want to give you a and tell you from experience that what does not kill you WILL make you stronger. I have been through alot also. My very close cousin/bff died of AIDS, my aunt who was like a second my died of Lupus and the father I thought I knew and loved turned out to be a pedaphile (and lied to me so i went upstate to visit him in jail for a year b4 I got anonymously the court papers showing what he really went to jail for) and much more. I know it seems like everything is crumbling around you but trust me ..IT WILL BE OK. stay strong and take this marriage as a knew beginning. Take care of yourself!!

                21 + Bride & Groom Booked!!

                #18 IslamoradaBride

                • Jr. Member
                • 459 posts

                  Posted 30 July 2009 - 01:29 PM

                  I am glad to hear that you are feeling more confident about a move. I still think it is very important that you get counseling of some sort-- I can't stress that enough.

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