Gift Giving Traditions - Posted on Friend's Website

[CourtneyV]

This actually ticked me off. Maybe I'm just grumpy today, but the things she assumes made me pretty grumpy. She said she was going to send us an invite, which I haven't received yet... but Aaron and I already decided we wouldn't be going to this one since there is a wedding the day after in another town (about 2 hours away, but we're going to spend the night there) and we didn't have to rush between weddings. This person is a "friend" that I don't like anymore, vs. the other wedding of my uncle to this really amazing woman... they took in SIX children of her sisters under their care, which brings their household total to TWELVE people! (including both of their kids from previous marriages). ANYWAYS, I'm getting sidetracked. My friend sent me her website, and under "Gifts" section this is what it says:

 

Tips Can Make Gift Giving Easier!!! Follow these, and you're sure to keep everyone happy.

 

 

*Respect the couple's gift registry. This way, you can be assured they both will like the gift you give them.

 

*Whenever possible, ship your gift ahead of the wedding. Try not to hand-deliver your gift to the reception unless it is cash, which should be presented to the bride or groom in person.

 

*If you receive an invitation, even if you can't attend the wedding, it is expected you will send a gift.

 

*If you can't bear to buy another toaster, go in on a group gift. Gather a group of friends or family and pitch in for a big-ticket item -- a television, for instance.

 

 

First of all, I will be RSVPing "No", so why do I have to get her a gift? If I actually liked her, I would whether I was going or not - but I know she's just inviting me for presents (I haven't talked to her in 5+ years, and when I do talk to her she doesn't even pretend like she cares how I'm doing. She pretty much only talks about herself!) Second, if I was going.. I wouldn't march right up to her with money in hand and give it to her... I'd put it with the other gifts I'd expect to be there (note: this isn't a DW). I just thought posting this on her website was tacky and rude. There isn't even registry, just pictures of things they like. I like when people post their registry info on their website, it's definately handy... but tips on gift-giving is a no-no (IMO)!

 

Anyways, I guess this turned into more of a vent than anything... but is this not incredibly tacky??! I couldn't believe it when I read it!

[Sarah]

I agree- posting this on YOUR OWN website is in incredibly poor taste!

[Adamsgrrl]

OMG!!! How incredibly tacky and distatseful... i'm sure everyones going to be talking about this at the Wedding!! What was she thinking??!?!

[Jessalyn]

I agree...totally tacky! A registery would be okay, but rules about what to give and how to give it...give me a break!

[Heidi]

WOW! I think it is incredibly tacky to put that on your OWN website! I'd be grumpy after reading that too!!!

[tvt]

OH. MY. GOSH. I'm still gasping at this!!!!!!!!!! How tacky! Ugh, I'm speachless....... how could someone post that on their site..... man the nerve of some people

[RAENJAY]

I'm gonna agree - totally tacky! Why doesn't she just post a list of

 

Aunt Sue - Buy me a TV

Uncle Bill - You'll get us a new washer

 

It's almost the same thing. And it's not like you can't return something if you don't like what people have given you. It's supposed to be the thought that counts.

[MorganShae]

how mind boggling! she will probably get less presents now that she posted her gift giving rules because i'm sure you weren't the only person annoyed after reading that on her site!

[bride2be]

I completely agree...it is very tacky to post something that not to mention greedy! I would question the reason she is even getting married.

 

If I were in your situation (don't even like her and hadn't talked in 5 years) I would not feel compelled to send a gift. (just my thoughts)

[Christine]

that is very rude and tacky. I wouldn't doubt if she invites a lot of people hoping to get gifts...

however yes if you are invited you are supposed to send a gift, but I don't think in all situations its necessary. I know my FI's grandma wanted us to invite people we didn't know because they were family and that is what we should do, but we 1. never expected them to go and 2. don't want them to spend money on us, they don't even know us really.