MIL issues/deposit question
Posted 29 June 2009 - 10:50 PM
so anyway, she's being a real jerk about the wedding. She doesnt like that we're getting married in HI..we're from boston, she doesnt want to take the long flight. Her 50th bday is also a few days before the wedding so she got mad because we were planning on leaving that day.. because by all means her party is more important than our wedding. So we told her that we'd change the wedding date so we wouldnt miss her holy birthday party and so she wouldnt have to worry about leaving the next day.
she still complained and said she wasnt going to Hawaii.. DF asked her one more time tonight and asked her to give him her final answer if she was going to be at our wedding or not... she said flat out "NO"
i dont get it.. why wouldnt you want to be at your only son's wedding? who cares if its a long flight.. she's only 49, she has no health problems... its not like she cant make the flight, she just chooses not too.
still, i feel like she should be there.. she is his mother (unfortunately lol). So i'm considering moving the wedding somewhere closer.. bermuda, mabye jamaica or the bahamas.. the thing is, we've already given our W/C Lori a deposit for Olowalu Planation.. does anyone know, if we decided not to have it there can we get the deposit back? or at least some of it??
Posted 30 June 2009 - 07:09 AM
I know it is important for your MIL to be there, but in the end it is her choice and if she stays home it is her issue to deal with that regret. I kinda have a feeling she would have something else to be mad about even if you did move the wedding back home.
Posted 30 June 2009 - 07:36 AM
Posted 30 June 2009 - 08:14 AM
Posted 30 June 2009 - 08:37 AM
Good Luck, I know thses women can be extremely stubborn, but patience will win out. Just smile and wave at her andrant and rave to FI. LOL
You will have to keep us updated
Posted 30 June 2009 - 09:27 AM
Posted 30 June 2009 - 11:17 AM
| Originally Posted by DanielleNDerek |
Honestly i think that if you did change your destination she still wouldnt go. 1st she complained about the departure date and you moved that and now its just too far. sounds like she's just using the long plane ride as her excuse not to attend. I know the plane ride is really long but if she really wanted to be there that wouldnt stop her.
I agree completely with this.
And as someone else posted, I also really think it's a power play. My mom tries to pull this on me, but I out stubborn her and she caves.
Posted 30 June 2009 - 11:43 AM
Posted 30 June 2009 - 01:05 PM
They didn't talk for months... then, when John's brother booked his trip, he booked the parent's a room and flight too!! Since the money can't be refunded, they are NOW going. LOL
I guess my point is that it's more important to do what the two of you want to do for your wedding. There was many a time I wanted to contact her and scold her for hurting John (who is a very sensitive man)... but even though I am soon to be family, it was between my fiance and his mother, and I had to stay out of it. You don't want to come between the two... though it's difficult not to say anything!
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