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JOSIE

Need Major Etiquette Help - Vacation before your best friends wedding?

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Here's the story: My FI just got offered free plane tickets to NYC where his best friend lives. We were asked to come out for 4th of July weekend, pretty much all expenses paid to visit the FI's best friend & his girlfriend at their lakehouse. FI is extremely excited because he never gets to see his best friend and there is so little cost to us.

 

Only problem is, my best friends wedding is the following weekend (July 11th) and I'm the maid of honor!!

 

Do I even bring this up to her or is it completely taboo to go out of town the weekend before your best friends wedding?? Being that I'm doing a destination, I have no idea what traditional weddings entail and what details are finalized that week and what should or might require my help. Our trip would only be for 3 days (fly out thurs night back home sunday).

 

GIRLS PLEASE HELP!!!! I NEED ADVICE & OPINIONS!!

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I also think that's sweet for you to be concerned about her feelings and last minute plans.

 

If you are her MOH, I would think you are close enough to her to let her know you have to be out of town the weekend prior, so ask what you can do before/after those few days to make sure she is as stress-free as possible and that everything you need to help her do is accomplished.

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I think you are fine to go...I would. It is really great that you are so considerate of her feelings. Most wouldn't even give it a second thought. I would just let her know that you will be out of town, and make yourself available to her in the days leading up to the wedding.

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I have to agree with all the girls here. It is wonderful of you to consider her, but I too think that everything that should be done, will have already been done for this. Tell her about it, I am sure she will encourage you to go. If there is anything left to be done you can probably schedule it when you get back. Go have fun and enjoy.

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I think you should go. Maybe just check in with your friend a couple weeks before the wedding to see if there's anything you can help her out with early. Then of course, dive in once you get back from your trip.

 

I'm sure she'll understand!

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yeah I don't think it is a big deal to go away...you are not committed to her the weekend before...if she needs anything just do it before or after you go to NY

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I agree with what everyone else has said. I think it's extremely considerate of you to be worried, however I don't see you going out of town the weekend before as being an issue. If I were in that situation I would let my friend know I was going to be out of town and make sure there isn't anything they were expecting from me for that particular weekend. I think at that point there is probably little that you could be doing to help her anyway, the planning phase should pretty much be done.

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I think you can go, but you know your friend and her personality. Do you think she's going to be upset about this for some reason? If so then let her know now so she can get over it now, rather than freaking out a week before her wedding. But don't ASK her, TELL her, you're going away...and don't make a big deal about it. The bigger deal you make of it, the bigger deal she will make of it.

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