Is it selfish to elope without 11yr old son?
Posted 31 March 2009 - 01:43 PM
I just know that our son was a HUGE part of our wedding and I would have regreted him not being a part of it every day if we had left him out of the wedding.
Posted 09 April 2009 - 11:29 PM
My son has been very involved with knowing everything thus far, and we have been very diligent of including him on everything. Our ceremony in Mexico is a symbolic Mayan ceremony. We are having a very special day with him when we marry legally here in the states, and he is included at all other functions.
Do not feel guilty that your child is not with you during the destination wedding; some people can't afford that; or other legitimate reasons. Make a special day with him and just the 3 of you.
Posted 10 April 2009 - 02:51 AM
try to incorporate your son into the ceremony somehow. you won't regret it.
Posted 10 April 2009 - 08:48 AM
Do what is best for you. If you are having second thoughts about not including him, then your gut is trying to tell you something!
Posted 11 April 2009 - 04:33 PM
The reasons are both selfish and UNselfish. As a parent, I know that the need to oversee and take care of does not stop just because there are others present, willing to help out. I know I would be too distracted worrying every moment about where they are, if they had eaten, were they too close to the water, strangers, etc. is no way I could NOT mother them and just be a bride.Yea, there are four of them, so it's a bit different but the logic is the same. If you can be a BRIDE and not just mom, that's one thing. On the flip side of that, there is a safety issue to consider. We COULD try to bring someone along solely to look after the kids...but who wants to go on a trip and hole up in a room the entire time? On top of that, there is the additional expense.....airlines don't care how tiny the butt's are that fill the seats.
It's just not practical for us, BUT our kids are young and the sentimental value of them being present isn't quite the same as I'm sure it is for you. They won't understand the sentimentality so much, but will miss us certainly. We WILL involve them in our legal day.
You have to make this decision based on what you feel is best for your son and what YOU can live with, not anyone else.
http://i17.photobuck....inecollage.jpgThe Fab Four (my quads) Meryn, Kellen, Nico & Layla
http://global.thekno...rs/tt265ad.aspxhttp://www.mywedding...nnah/index.html20 STD's w. pre-lim RSVP sent 6/15/09: 7 "Yes" so far/10 guests total!
Posted 11 April 2009 - 05:48 PM
Don't get me wrong I totally agree that parents should have holidays without their children - we go away without mine all the time because we have plenty of holidays with them too - but if you leave your son out on such a special occasion - you may always regret it.
But only you and your FI can make the decision that is right for your family and I know it's not an easy one.
Best wishes with whatever you decide.
Posted 20 April 2009 - 07:42 PM
Posted 21 April 2009 - 12:54 PM
Posted 21 April 2009 - 01:28 PM
Posted 21 April 2009 - 01:37 PM
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