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A wedding no-no?

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#1 CourtneyV

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    Posted 08 May 2007 - 12:16 PM

    Aaron and I have already nixed the idea of dancing. We're both pretty brutal dancers and neither of us really care if there is a first dance or not. We'll bring in some other form of entertainment for the reception, but we don't care if there is dancing or not. So the other day I was telling my parents this and my dad got a look in his eyes. Apparently he's already picked out a song for the daddy-daughter dance!!! I don't know what to do. Aaron really hates the idea of dancing and he thinks that if there is even one single dance all eyes will be on him to join the dance floor (which I could see happening). So what do I do? Is there another way I can honour my relationship with my dad? I think just doing one dance and moving on is awkward and brings the attention to more dancing which makes Aaron cringe in fear just thinking about it! I know it's our wedding and we can do what we want, but I do have a fantastic realtionship with my dad and don't want to just skip right over him either!!! Are there any nifty altneratives to the daddy-daughter dance? or should we just suck it up and do it?
    Happily Married since May 9, 2008
    Proud Mama to Evelyn Eileen since June 8, 2010


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      Posted 08 May 2007 - 12:26 PM

      I would do the dance with your dad. You only have one chance.

      Can you & Aaron do a first dance and just have your family/bridal party join in after a minute? Then you can do your father/daughter immediately after and make that it.

      #3 Rachelle E.

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        Posted 08 May 2007 - 12:29 PM

        Ooohh....yikes. I'm not sure what to say about that one. I haven't heard of anything in particular as a substitue for that dance. I'll try to brainstorm a bit and see what comes up. If it makes you feel any better, I kinda' had do to two f/d dances at my wedding....the whole dad/step-dad thing. (my step-dad raised me pretty much) And I was nervous, and it was a little awkward but in the end it was ok.

        David got out of the m/s dance because his mom can't dance. (doesn't like it but also has some health problems that make her extra awkward sometimes) I'll admit, I was a little jealous!! ;-)

        Worst case scenario, I'd say just do it. Just like you've dreamed about certain parts of your life/wedding this may well be a big milestone to him that he's always imagined...like giving you away at the ceremony and stuff.

        Ooh! As I'm writing. . .an idea occured to me. Now it may be pretty cheesey but I'll throw it out there:
        What about doing a slide show/toast thing w/ your dad? Like have a special presentation made w/ all the best pics of you guys throughout the years - maybe set to the song he had picked out - and then perhaps a toast thanking him for being your dad etc. Which may well be a good lead-in for his toast as well.

        That's all I got at the moment! :-)

        #4 CourtneyV

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          Posted 08 May 2007 - 12:37 PM

          Oooh, Rachelle that's good! I really don't want to take away something that is important to him. Do you think if he just thought we weren't doing the dance and I surprised him with a slideshow or something he'd be happy, or he'd want to do the dance anyways?! lol, I know you don't know him or anything but I'm looking for an outsiders opinion! Also, we're already doing an Aaron and Courtney Wedding slideshow at either the rehearsal dinner or the wedding... would it be lame to have two slideshows?
          Happily Married since May 9, 2008
          Proud Mama to Evelyn Eileen since June 8, 2010

          #5 A10CalGal

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            Posted 08 May 2007 - 12:39 PM

            C'mon Courtney - dance w/your daddy! I'm sure it will be a very special memory for the both of you. I mean, how badly can you mess up a slow dance? Just follow his lead! I really think you should do it.

            #6 Rachelle E.

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              Posted 08 May 2007 - 12:53 PM

              Ok, I have to say....I really do think you should consider dancing w/ him. If it helps. . .maybe find out HOW important it is to him. Ask your mom or something. If you ask him directly he may not feel like he can be 100% honest. If it's something he was really looking forward to, then definitely do it.

              BUT, if he seems kinda 50/50 on the idea (like he can take it or leave it) then look into the slide show thing. If he's content w/ not dancing then I think it would be great to do that as a surprise. But if you're trying to "bargain" w/ him you may have to tell him about it.

              I would not do both slide shows at the same event. So if you do the daddy/daughter one at the reception, then I would reserve the Aaron/Courtney one for the rehearsal dinner...and with that being a smaller group, you may be able to include some crazier pics than you might show to EVERYone at the wedding. Unless the same people will be at both events. . .in which case I still say only one slide show per event! Lol!

              #7 dragonfly

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                Posted 08 May 2007 - 01:00 PM

                Dance with your dad, my dad recently passed away and what I wouldn't give to be able to dance with him again.
                Your father has probably dreamt about dancing with his baby girl forever, don't let this beautiful moment pass you by. Your dad already knowing what song he wants to dance with you, says to me that a lot of thought has probably gone into it probably longer than you can imagine, it is a great testement to the relatonship you have with him. Don't worry about how things look, not dancing with your better half, the only important things in life is respecting and honouring the people we love, and this is a beautiful way to honour your dad, and what he means to you, and you to him.

                #8 Christine

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                Posted 08 May 2007 - 01:23 PM

                oh you have to dance with your dad Courtney, sorry but its just part of getting married and you and your hubby have to dance too-even if its only for a minute of a song, it would not be a wedding without it...why not take dance lessons, I mean you have a year.
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                #9 Natasha92907

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                  Posted 08 May 2007 - 01:23 PM

                  Personally, dancing with my dad has always been a big part of my wedding to me. I would try to find a way to incorporate dancing with him. But, I also like the slideshow idea.

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                  #10 tvt

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                    Posted 08 May 2007 - 01:26 PM

                    I'm with the other girls - dance with your dad! It's so sweet that he already picked out a song.

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