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My BFF wants to bring her on/off a-hole BF *LONG*


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#11 trance_angelx0x

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    Posted 20 February 2009 - 09:14 PM

    awh you're just having a small bridezilla moment I don't understand girls sometimes.. they know these kinds of guys never change and always come running back to their friends crying wah wah wahhhhhh why can't I get a guy to respect me, he always cheats on me, etc. I will think happy thoughts that she kicks his ass to the curb before your wedding, just for you.

    You should tell her how you feel, definetly. Most people can't read other peoples' minds. I agree that this could end up in major drama once you are in DR since there will be tons of half naked women available to him. Yikes!

    Hang in there sistah!

    #12 DanielleNDerek

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      Posted 20 February 2009 - 10:02 PM

      Ugh I hate those kinds of situations. Normally I would say it's her vacation too she can take whomever she wants but he doesnt have to be invited to your wedding day events (or other wedding activities during the trip).

      but than in the back of my head all i can think is that he'll be hitting on other chicks at the resort. What resort are you staying at? hopefully its mostly couples so he will stick with your bff. And hopefully its big enough where you dont have to see him the whole time.

      I think you should have a talk with her and let her know you still dont like her bf from back in the day and you really dont want him at your wedding. Let her know that you love her and really want her to go but you would prefer if she left the bf you dont like at home so she can enjoy herself with you and your other girlfriends.
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      #13 stacey

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        Posted 20 February 2009 - 10:19 PM

        uggghhh this is a hard one. I am totally torn. Part of me thinks that this guy is a total douche and why would you want someone at your wedding that you dont like. The other part of me thinks that your freind is feeling a little desprate and even though this guy treats her like crap, she feels the need to have a man with her. So what do you do, tell her no and risk ruining your freindship, or allow him to come and be annoyed about it?
        Maybe you can just avoid it for awhile and then they will be off again when its the big day. Im sorry thats the only advice I have right now, and I know it sucks.
        Stacey & Ely 10.14.2008

        #14 stacey

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          Posted 20 February 2009 - 10:19 PM

          uggghhh this is a hard one. I am totally torn. Part of me thinks that this guy is a total douche and why would you want someone at your wedding that you dont like. The other part of me thinks that your freind is feeling a little desprate and even though this guy treats her like crap, she feels the need to have a man with her. So what do you do, tell her no and risk ruining your freindship, or allow him to come and be annoyed about it?
          Maybe you can just avoid it for awhile and then they will be off again when its the big day. Im sorry thats the only advice I have right now, and I know it sucks.
          Stacey & Ely 10.14.2008

          #15 YoursTruly

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            Posted 21 February 2009 - 01:59 AM

            Wow---this is so tough for you but if you cannot be upfront and honest with a BFF, what does that say for the friendship? I would in a "drunken moment". let her know what you think of the situation. Sounds like she needs to forgive herself first for letting a man treat her in such a disrespectful manner. Then and only then can she even begin to right the self esteem issues and everything else that is wrong with this picture. keep being a friend and dont give up on her if you feel the friendship is solid and worth keeping.

            #16 azhuskergirl

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              Posted 23 February 2009 - 08:17 PM

              That's a tough situation for you. We had a similar moment when planning our wedding (although my friend was not in our wedding party). My old roommate, who I love, was dating an asshole. He was disrespectful to us, one of our friends & my ex-roommate the one time we met him (she lives in another state & we went to visit). He was a real douchebag. She even commented that he's going to make a good ex-husband & father for her kids....she doesn't even think it'll work long term with him (but he has $$). My husband & I both decided that we didn't want this ass at our wedding (especially since we were only having 20-25 people attend), so I wrote my friend a very heartfelt letter about how we would love to have her at our wedding, but we're not comfortable having him there. Probably a shitty thing to lay on her, but it was our wedding & on this we stood firm. Needless to say, I haven't heard from my friend since then. I am sad to have ended our friendship, but have come to terms with her choice (& ours).

              I know it's not the same situation, but I thought it may help to know others have gone through something similar.




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