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Wedding the same day as mine!!!

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#1 ylopez87

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    Posted 14 January 2009 - 08:39 PM

    Hey girlies!! I just have to vent!! Ok so today cousin's husband calls me to tell me he is thinking of surprising my cousin with a vow renewal ceremony, (which I am super happy for her, she deserves it!).
    Then he tells me he wants to do it during the week we are in Puerto Vallarta!! This was when i started to think this is my wedding have your own DW but I didnt know how to tell him that! But this gets better he tells me if maybe FI and I wouldnt mind splitting costs with him and holding our weddings on the same day together!! Is he on crack?? I dont want to be too bitchy because I love my cousin to dearly but this is MY DAY !! FI and I think that if her husband wants to be romantic and have a vow renewal to do it after our wedding maybe the next day. I think were being nice enough to offer that suggestion! Why cant he be romantic when we come back or some other time? why would he think this was going to be ok? I feel like he is stealing my thunder!!! Well ladies what do you think I should do? How should I tell him that I dont want to share my special day? Thanks girls I know only you would understand my frustrations!

    #2 stacey


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      Posted 14 January 2009 - 09:01 PM

      That is not ok. Just tell him no. Maybe the day after your wedding wuld be more appropriate. And I think that once your cousin knows, she would not want to do it the same day.
      Stacey & Ely 10.14.2008

      #3 Jennifer Davis

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        Posted 14 January 2009 - 09:08 PM


        I would just be up front with him and tell him that this is your day and you do not want to share it. I don't think there is anything wrong with saying that and I wouldn't consider a direct response like that bitchy at all.

        Your cousin's husband obviously doesn't "get it". If he did, he wouldn't have even suggested something so ridiculous - I think only a flat out "no" would set hiim straight.

        #4 lscilley

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          Posted 14 January 2009 - 09:12 PM

          Wow that is so not ok. I would be so mad right now. I agree and think you should tell him to do it after yours if he wants to do it. Your day is your day!!

          #5 syl1115

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            Posted 14 January 2009 - 09:17 PM

            Sometimes it is hard for men to understand things like this. If he is not typically romantic, he probably thought your wedding vacation would be the perfect opportunity to "kill two birds with one stone" so to speak. I'm sure he is not trying to steal your thunder and I'm sure he would understand if you told him that you would prefer that your wedding day was focused on you and your FI.

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            #6 samanthag

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              Posted 14 January 2009 - 09:29 PM

              I agree with the other girls. I think he just doesn't get it.
              I would just be honest with him...

              #7 JoLo908

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                Posted 14 January 2009 - 09:52 PM

                Tell him no! It is your day... We have to learn that sometimes it is okay to say NO... I think as women we are trained that it is mean or something. It's not!!! This is your day! Be honest.... We are allowed to say no!!!

                #8 Danniellou

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                  Posted 14 January 2009 - 10:16 PM

                  Absolutely not!!! That's really romantic of him and everything but come on, it's YOUR day!!! Sometimes men don't think, haha! I'm sure if you talked to him about how you feel, he would be understanding.

                  #9 Katherine4-09

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                    Posted 14 January 2009 - 10:32 PM

                    you just have to tell him, explain that it took lots of planning for this day, and you think it's great that he wants to renew his vows, espically around you getting married gives u great hope, but maybe he can do it the day after your wedding this way you have your day and they will have theres. If he won't do it then just tell him no. It's very rude of him to even ask but he is a man and they really don't get things like this. keep us posted
                    Katherine & Jeff getting hitched 4/24/09!!

                    #10 Kla.Kari

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                      Posted 14 January 2009 - 11:12 PM

                      WOW! Not just that he asked to steal your day away from you.... but then he asked you to split the cost with him?! Are you serious!?! I understand economic times are hard, but come on! Your day is just that... YOUR DAY! It's easier to say than do, I know, but just let him know how uncomfortable that request made you and while you'd love for them to have the opportunity to renew vows, your wedding day is just not the appropriate time to do so.
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                      Pigeon Island, St. Lucia
                      April 11, 2009Simply Beautiful

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