Bridal shower 12 hours after I get home from honeymoon

Kristy! · January 13, 2009

My best friend is getting married two months after me. Her sister set her shower/bachelorette party date for June 13th, a week after I get home from my honeymoon. No problem! But I just got an e-mail saying that she is moving the shower and bachelorette party to June 6th. My flight comes into JFK the night of June 5th, meaning I won't get home until at least midnight. This takes away that first morning of sleeping in with my hubby, plus I'm going to be out all night. Is it wrong of me to say that I can't do that day? Am I being selfish? I just feel like I'm going to be exhausted and won't be totally there for my best friend. I feel like the worst bridesmaid ever!

Soon To Be Mrs. Gomez · January 13, 2009

I think you will be too exhausted. I think you should be allowed to miss it considering the flight situation. Just send a gift later. I'm sure yoru friend will understand.

happygilmore · January 13, 2009

IMO, if this is the only day it can work for people that you should be there. My guess is that the shower won't be until later in the morning or early afternoon, which gives you time to sleep in, get ready for the day. I know I would be disappointment in my bridesmaid if she didn't show up for the imporant before wedding events.

yamille · January 13, 2009

I think you WILL be exhausted but I'm going to be honest... and I think you should tough it out and go to her shower. It's only 1 day of being super tired but I feel like these things (weddings!) can make everyone really sensitive (me included) and if you are her dear friend i think you should go.

Plus.. i am assuming that she will be going to your DW and then would be angry for you not going to something in your hometown?

Kristy! · January 13, 2009

I'm definitely going to her shower, there's no question there. I was wondering if it would be wrong of me to kind of push to have the shower another day. All of the bridesmaids (10 of them!) are trying to find a date that works, so I was wondering if I should block out the 6th. The thing is, it looks like that date works for everyone else.

I was laughing because her sister told me that my friend would understand if I was too tired to go the bacherlorette party that night. First of all, no she wouldn't. Second, I've been waiting for that party for 14 years! It sucks that some of the fun has been taken out of it for me just because it's on that day (let's be honest, I'll want to be home with my new hubby instead of being at a club), but whatever, that day is about her, not me.

By the way Yamille, you will be meeting her next month, so this post never happened!

*Casey* · January 13, 2009

I totally see your point, but look at the reverse side... Would your feeling be hurt if she were in your position and it was your shower? I guess it really depends on the type of person she is, and you know her so do you think she would be upset? If not... I say in bed with the new hubby and order in breakfast! But if it's going to eat you up inside and feel guilty that you didn't go, then I think I would suck it up and go. I mean, you do have the rest of your life to wake up to him. I guess I'm not much help. I can really see both sides of the situation.