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Jamaica wedding blues

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#21 Scott-Pierre

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    Posted 14 January 2009 - 12:46 AM

    My best friend straight out told me she wouldn't be coming because of finances. She is single, no kids, and has a full-time job. She is super cheap, doesn't even have cable, but yet can't scrape together the money to come and be my MOH. She had the nerve to ask why we didn't just plan a wedding back closer to our hometowns. She doesn't even live in our hometown! She would have to travel there too!!! We gave a years notice hoping that people are saving. We purposely chose Jamaica because it is one of the more affordable islands. We are still a little over 8 months left until our wedding, so I have yet to see exactly how many people are definitely coming.

    This process will definitely show u who u are important to. If any of my friends invited me to their one and only wedding to the love of their life, i would find a way to be there no matter what!

    #22 divadivine25

    • Jr. Member
    • 427 posts

      Posted 14 January 2009 - 02:25 AM

      Originally Posted by drbrainfreeze
      Welcome to Destination wedding planning! You are now part of the club ;-) I think that we have all experienced this.

      Just remember that this day is about you two, and that is all that matters. People will regret not coming.
      Couldnt have said it better myself. Once we got over the fact that we wouldnt have a large group going, planning has been smooth sailing.

      #23 shancrystal

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        Posted 14 January 2009 - 11:20 AM

        Don't get discouraged waliandayanna! Even though it may be disappointing about the number of guests backing out and not making it to your wedding, at the end of the day it's all about you and your hubby and the memories that you two will be making together!

        I am dealing with the same thing and I want to lose my mind but honestly it's not worth trying to stress myself out. The way I see it is when I bring back the pictures and video to the people who weren't able to make it, they'll be disappointed what they missed out on!! hehe :)

        Best wishes to you!

        #24 Mother of Bride

        Mother of Bride
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          Posted 14 February 2009 - 06:50 PM

          Just remember that this day is about you two, and that is all that matters. People will regret not coming.

          I'm just so thrilled that my daughter & future son-in-law have included us in their planning process. I can't wait to join the 20-24 people that are traveling to Jamaica with us. We are going to have a BLAST & those that didn't even try to make arrangements to come are going to miss a GREAT time.....its THEIR loss !!

          #25 jjurick

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          • 45 posts

            Posted 14 February 2009 - 07:48 PM

            I know how you feel. I'm very disappointed that my brother who was going to give me away isn't coming. Doesn't have the money. I wish I could help him pay but we just can't. I'm finally coming to terms with it.

            #26 m_willis22

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            • 123 posts

              Posted 14 February 2009 - 08:16 PM

              we gave everyone 18 months to plan and people are complaining now that it is 4 months out. i can't help you and i don't want to hear it. fi and i have been to 11 weddings all over the place and we never complained about the price. on top of that the destinations were nowhere as nice as jamaica. besides the economy, we have 6 couples that cannot attend b/c they are pregnant. yes 6. i told fi the other day we should have had a short engagement and gotten married 6 months after we got engaged...the economy was better and no one was popping out babies.

              i can sympathize.

              #27 jamaica2009bride

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                Posted 14 February 2009 - 09:07 PM

                I can totally sympathize, like most other couples we have had our share of disappointments with guests. We actually have more guests than we originally anticipated, but the people that are coming aren't who we expected! FH's twin brother and best man pulled out (two months before the wedding, after I had saved for a year to pay for over half of his trip- he couldn't save $1000 in 18 months but he can miraculously afford copious amounts of marijuana, a new dirt bike and a new basketball court in his backyard), as did three other groomsmen, who "wouldn't miss it for the world." We are okay with people not coming, but we were definitely disappointed to find out that I have four people standing for me and FH has just one!!! But oh well. In three weeks we will be married and won't care about this stuff!!!
                I know you are disappointed now but in a little while it won't seem so bad, I promise :)

                #28 montegobay09

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                • 832 posts

                  Posted 14 February 2009 - 09:36 PM

                  As you can see I really think this disappointment is like initiation into the DW club. We've all experienced it and it's something that is so heartbreaking when it happens but we soon realize why we chose a DW and that our day will be special no matter who is there. I'm just looking forward to the time I get to spend with the people who made the decision to make our DW an important day to spend with us. We're going to have a blast!! I can't wait!

                  #29 Jodyann08

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                  • 37 posts

                    Posted 15 February 2009 - 06:08 PM

                    Originally Posted by waliandayanna
                    Wow, what a quick response! Its nice to know I'm not alone. I have heard of people having 100 guests, and I was thinking to myself "did I miss something". I really want people to be there, but you all are right, the most important people (i.e. parents, brothers sisters, grandparents) will all be there. I'm such as party animal though and I wanted a huge party, but we are having a home reception so we can still party.

                    The problem lies here: Say we only have 5 guests staying on the resort and say we end up with 10-15 people staying offsite (a strong possibility) we can only have 5 more guests come to wedding. That's moondance's policy. We told everyone that they need to stay on the resort to avoid this, but they somehow think its better/cheaper from them to stay off site. We broke it down for them and showed them that they would be spending the same amount of money or more staying at their other chosen places once they factor in food and transportation. Moondance resort is an ALL Inclusive place and you literally don't have to lift a finger once you arrive.

                    I don't know, thanks for your replies ladies. I'm going to stay positive. I know it will be a beautiful day. I guess the apprehension is normal!

                    Dont fret!! I'm in the same boat, but you can still have people come off site even if the numbers dont match up. If you look at there website they have a 75 dollar fee for off sight guests. I mean it wouldnt be ideal thats for sure, if anything we'll only be a few people off. It will add up if you have the majority staying off site.

                    I found out today that my future in-laws got DENIED for their PASSPORT!! I think they have enough time, but what do you do when u get denied. They were in the process of moving states and there address and license didnt match, who knows!!!!!

                    #30 blurt

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                    • 105 posts

                      Posted 17 February 2009 - 09:39 AM

                      Don't worry about it, it happen to us, we had 20 guest coming now it's only 8. They all let us down for one reason or another, my FI was a bit upset because one of the couples who dropped out was his bestman but we have asked one of our other friends (who is coming) to do it. At first we were dissappointed but the more we have thought about it the better it has become. We get to spend more time with each other and with our guest who are coming and you have less people to worry about. We have been able to spend abit more on their gifts and favors. It's your day and when they see the photo's they will all wished they had been there. x

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