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Guest wearing their wedding dress

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#1 heather007

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    Posted 07 January 2009 - 02:17 PM

    I don't want to say who it is, because the internet is just way to small, but one of my very closely related relatives is planning on wearing her wedding dress to my wedding.

    Her dress is white with tiny blue flowers on it, without a train but a puffy bottom and spegitti straps. I can't tell her not to wear it because she is a little, for lack of a better word, "sensitive" and would blow it out of proportion and would probably wear it anyway just because I asked her not to. She would end up spreading lies about me telling her not to come to the wedding, because she has already done that with me in the past on several different occasions.
    I know why she is doing it, and I don't want to sound self-centered, but she is doing it because she knows how it would make me feel and how much it would hurt me, she pulls stuff like this whenever it is someone else's day and she is not the focus of attention.

    Another bummer is that all of my guests from my side of the family have seen her in the dress, because they were at her wedding, so that means that they would know it's her wedding dress.

    I'm not mad, I'm more hurt. She has done so much "mean" things to me in the past and this is just the icing on the cake. I talked to me Mom about it and she said that the person may not wear it, she might be just saying that she will to make me upset and to cause drama, and if she does end up wearing it, at least Francis' side won't know that it's her wedding dress.


    #2 MsShelley


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      Posted 07 January 2009 - 02:19 PM

      omg, I feel for you. We actually moved our wedding date up 3 weeks, we were thinking of getting married the day after our friends to have like "a big party weekend" but then the couple said oh yeah and then she can wear her wedding dress to your wedding and get beach wedding pictures.
      uh, no! no way in hell. After Amos and I heard that we changed our date to a couple weeks before their wedding

      #3 *Heather*


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        Posted 07 January 2009 - 02:22 PM

        Not cool. Not cool at all. Someone other than you needs to tell her that it's REALLY inappropriate! Can your mom say something to her?

        #4 YoursTruly

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          Posted 07 January 2009 - 02:22 PM

          WTF? Just when I think I have heard it all--another story takes the cake--in thi s instance literally! Why have you invited her to the wedding. Obviously she is blood but if she cared for you she would not do something like this. I have a relative that I swear is schizo--and guess what--I told her point blank she will not be around to upset me or cause undue drama. Can she be un-invited??!! What is wrong with family members!!

          #5 becks



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            Posted 07 January 2009 - 02:25 PM

            Holy S**T. You've got to be kidding.

            That is so totally appalling I can't even begin to tell you.

            On the other hand, you can bet that everyone at your wedding will be tearing her to shreds the next day for wearing a wedding dress to your wedding. And your FI's family will know because your family will be talking about it.

            What a C-U-Next-Tuesday!

            Seriously... uninvite her.

            (or give one of your girlfriends a nice big glass of red wine to have an "accident" with before you walk down the aisle... all over her dress!)

            Happily married since 2008

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            #6 boscobel

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              Posted 07 January 2009 - 02:26 PM

              Wow, I never heard anything like that before. Now I love my wedding dress and would LOVE to wear it again, but I would NEVER attempt to wear it to someone elses wedding! That's insane.

              And actually, what you think is a bad thing, might actually be a good thing - the fact that your family knows it's her wedding dress. They will KNOW she is a psycho looking for attention and it will only make her look bad.

              Becks - I love the "see you next Tuesday" reference! I totally forgot about that!!

              Oh, something else that I just remembered. I once wore a cream halter knee-lenght dress to Matt's cousins wedding. It was in June. I was worried when I bought it about the color, but it was cream and it wasn't long and in no way a wedding dress. But Matt's cousin still pointed it out to me and I felt awful that the bride might have felt I was trying to infringe on her day. I so wasn't trying to do that. So lesson learned. (very light) Cream is still not ok, even if it's short and clearly not a wedding dress.

              But my point is, that even if she intends to wear it up until the day of, her conscious might get the better of her since everyone will KNOW it's a wedding dress and she is evil.

              #7 KatyKo

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                Posted 07 January 2009 - 02:26 PM

                That is just very odd that anyone would want to wear a wedding dress to someone else's wedding...very strange indeed!

                #8 RoryS

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                  Posted 07 January 2009 - 02:26 PM

                  You're going to be the bride and look beautiful anyway, so no matter what she wears it won't matter. As a matter of fact, she may look like the "sore thumb" in that all of your family has already seen her in that dress. I'm sure on her "day" she looked lovely, but ya know - been there - done that! Your family can always go up to and say, hey, didn't we see you in that dress before?? -- only kidding ---

                  #9 Ashley0802

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                    Posted 07 January 2009 - 02:26 PM

                    Oh my gosh! This is horrible, I don't think you should hold your feelings it to her. Have someone talk to her about it, that is just not right, she already had her big day to wear her dress & shouldnt even think about trying to ruin your day!

                    #10 JUSTUSTWO


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                      Posted 07 January 2009 - 02:28 PM

                      Oh heck! Definitely crazy! I went to a friends wedding 2 years ago where one of her guests wore their wedding dress too! And to top it off she was like at least 6 months pregnant! I was absolutely shocked & appalled. At first I thought maybe that was all she had to wear & couldnt find anything else since she was so pregnant. But then I thought about it & figured she could've worn something else. I mean, she even wore the jacket that had a train attached!!!

                      The good thing is that I know I wasn't the only one annoyed! Everytime she walked around, other guests were looking at her & whispering among themselves. I think they couldn't believe it either.

                      So, as much as it may hurt & annoy you, IGNORE her. The other people around will hopefully make her uncomfortable & stare & whisper about her all day.

                      I was also thinking is it too late to un-invite her??

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