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Do you HAVE to register?


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#1 BeautifulBridetoBe

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    Posted 06 January 2009 - 10:45 AM

    What do you do when you have nothing to register for?

    My FI and I do not live together, but we moved out of our parent's homes recently and have bought all new stuff...2 of everything for our separate apartments.

    Now that we are getting married, we already have the little items we need. We tried registering and found 6 whole items that we wanted in the entire store! So we decided not to register and waste people's money on things we do not need.

    What we need are big ticket items! A new sofa set, a new bedroom set, furniture, etc. for our new house, not another toaster or bread maker or vaccuum cleaner. And these big ticket items will be looked for and bought after the wedding, when we have bought a home....so I wouldn't know where to ask for gift certificates to.

    Money would really be most practical, but we do not want to make it seem as though it is the only option. We are having my mom and his grandmother spread the word, but people are raising eyebrows when they hear we haven't registered.

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    #2 tylersgirl

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      Posted 06 January 2009 - 10:55 AM

      In your case, I just wouldn't register. Most guests will know to bring money if you aren't registered and then you can go buy your big ticket items. I wouldn't know how to register for the big ticket items without it seeming rude. JMO. Good luck girl!

      #3 Lindz

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        Posted 06 January 2009 - 10:57 AM

        I had the same question when my FI and I got engaged...we asked my sister (MOH) and mom to spread the word, that we are not registering (for the same exact reason as you.) We also have a website for our guests (see below) in our website we have a registry section where I put something like...your "presence" is all we need for a wonderful wedding therefore we have not registered....

        Not sure if that helps or makes sense...! haha...
        Good luck!

        #4 Ayita

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          Posted 06 January 2009 - 11:31 AM

          You don't have to, but typically people will make you gifts - that you don't want or don't like - if you don't....

          We are in the same case, we already have everything (we've lived on our own since 15 years for me, 10 years for him)... so we opted for the honeymoon registry. We are using Traveler's joy, it's super easy, super good looking, and you can type in anything (you can even add those 6 items you liked in that store... and put the picture you want). So we put stuff like drinks, car rental, jet skiing, massage for two, cigars, artwork from honeymoon location... and... actually the TTD session is in there. We thought that would be a great gift for our guests to give us ! There are stuff at any price and for all tastes. We did not want to register, but this stuff is really cool. We are thinking of taking pics of each gift we're "taking" to send with the thank you cards.

          #5 YoursTruly

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            Posted 06 January 2009 - 11:46 AM

            I too am in the same boat----have no interest in registering but after reading my fellow BDW message, may look into Traveler's Joy as an option. Otherwise you really don't have to register but if folks ask, just use monetary gifts towards your big purchases when you and FI are ready.

            #6 sunsetbride1

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              Posted 06 January 2009 - 03:20 PM

              Quote:
              Originally Posted by Lindz
              I had the same question when my FI and I got engaged...we asked my sister (MOH) and mom to spread the word, that we are not registering (for the same exact reason as you.) We also have a website for our guests (see below) in our website we have a registry section where I put something like...your "presence" is all we need for a wonderful wedding therefore we have not registered....

              Not sure if that helps or makes sense...! haha...
              Good luck!
              We are not registering either... we just can't bring ourselves to ask for gifts when ppl are spending so much $$ to come to our wedding.

              #7 boscobel

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                Posted 06 January 2009 - 03:39 PM

                You could make it easy on your guests and register at www.bedbathandbeyond.com, since they give cash back for any returns on purchases made from a registry.

                No matter if you register or not, people WILL buy you gifts. It's just the way it is. You could ask your mom(s) to pass the word that no gifts are necessary, or monetary gifts are preffered. But I think that might not be the proper ettiquette. Although, I doubt registering for gifts and returning them all is proper either!

                Oh, I just thought of something. . . There are online registries where you can add anything that hs a link. So what if you created the registry that you want, with the big ticket items that you want? I think it's www.myregistry.com, but not entirely sure...

                #8 Chanti

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                  Posted 06 January 2009 - 04:05 PM

                  Carly, thanks for the great suggestion RE: MyRegistry.com - All Stores One Registry ®!!! I just checked it out and that is likely the route we will take, being in the same position as BeautifulBridetoBe. My FI and I are both in our mid-30's and have been on our own each for 15 years. We already have 2 of everything, since we just moved in together, and cash will be the most beneficial gift, for a house downpayment :-)

                  #9 BachataBride

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                    Posted 06 January 2009 - 04:09 PM

                    Are all the big items you need at one store?? Maybe they have a registry - that way your guests can put $$ towards an account in your name then you can use that $$ to buy what you need!!

                    #10 Ayita

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                      Posted 06 January 2009 - 04:21 PM

                      Quote:
                      Originally Posted by sunsetbride1
                      We are not registering either... we just can't bring ourselves to ask for gifts when ppl are spending so much $$ to come to our wedding.
                      Neither did we... but people kept asking where we were registered and saying we would get something anyway !




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