How much do you give when you are a guest at a wedding?
Posted 03 January 2009 - 12:23 PM
In other cultures, weddings are a time to host family and friends with no financial expectations. It is about treating your guests well, so the gifts are not as abundant financially or may be more sentimental.
So I think culture plays a role in deciding how much to give for a wedding gift.That being said, we typically give $100 per person. That is considered high in our culture, but weddings are no longer the inexpensive family gatherings they once were.
We believe that a wedding is a time to bless the bride and groom with your best gift...whatever that is. It can be $20 if that is all you really have...It is not the amount but the sentiment behind it that is honourable.
I just don't think it is right to give the gift of $50, then spend $450 making yourself - a guest - look beautiful for the day as it is not about you. I think your best gift, whatever that is, should go to the couple.
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Posted 03 January 2009 - 12:29 PM
Posted 03 January 2009 - 01:01 PM
For me, I cover the cost of the plate, and then give a little more on top of that. So it really depends on the wedding that I am attending. So it is basically anywhere from $100 - $400 on average.
Posted 04 January 2009 - 03:40 AM
| Originally Posted by lauren |
it's hard b/c a lot of ppl didn't send a gift if they didn't come and now we're going to theirs.
I know I am off topic a bit with the last part of the rant. Sorry.
Posted 04 January 2009 - 11:45 AM
I've been brought up to always cover your plate and we always give money. I also love giving fine china depending on how close I am to the person. Just because my parents got a full dinner set that was hand made by one of their guests and they still use it to this day and I find something like that to be priceless and it's also something that you can pass down from generation to generation.
Posted 05 January 2009 - 01:42 AM
My cousin was a bridesmaid and was horrified cause she saw guests taking 4 or 5 snowflake bottle stoppers (these were the gifts) per person! Who does that?? Lesson learned: Do not place them in a basket and ask people to take them on their way out. Put it on the tables! I couldn't believe it. They were gorgeous stoppers...
Posted 05 January 2009 - 01:59 AM
Posted 05 January 2009 - 04:26 AM
I've spent anywhere from $100 to $500 per person depending on how close I was to the bride or groom. In the last wedding I was in, I bought her the duvet that she wanted. It was well out of my price range to start with, but I was able to snatch it when it temporarily went on sale for a price that I could afford!
Posted 05 January 2009 - 11:14 AM
Where I am from, you don't usually see $100 or more per person unless it is family. I do have to say that I did feel a little "cheated" not having a traditional wedding. Don't get me wrong, I would NEVER change my DW, but I think because we didn't have a traditional wedding people thought they were exempt from the tradition of giving gifts.
I had a lavish AHR so those that didn't travel could still feel like they were a part of the wedding. Luckily I am in the event business so I got a lot of breaks and called in a bunch of favors.
One family member gave me a card with $20. There are 6 adults in this family! They can afford more. It felt like "Oh Sh*t, we didn't get a gift, who has cash?" Even at cost, $3 per person did not cover thier plate. Oh and BIL and his new wife gave us $40!
Being a bride definitely gives you a different perspective.
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