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Having a baby after you turn 35 years old? Does age really matter?

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#1 samanthag

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    Posted 17 December 2008 - 03:29 PM

    Hey girls!

    Why does my doctor insist that I have my first child before I turn 35??
    I'm 32 right now. We moved our wedding date from 2009 to 2010, so I'll be getting married at the age of 34. FI & I want to have a baby after we officially get married.
    I'm soooo frustrated!!!!!!
    I had to cancel my appointment with my gyno today because I thought I was going to work and then my scheduling department called me & said that my flights today were cancelled so now I'm not working until tomorrow- but of course my doctor can't see me now. I scheduled this appointment because I want to know why he is so concerned with the whole age thing?

    What do you girls think?
    Does age really matter?

    #2 Sloan

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      Posted 17 December 2008 - 03:39 PM

      Your risk for birth defects and complications goes up after 35, actually 30. However, women have babies well into their 30's and 40's (50's even...) and have healthy happy babies. My aunt had my cousin when she was 42 and he's completely healthy. Good prenatal care is the key, although you can do everything perfect and still have things go wrong at any age. Im 30, will be 31 when we start trying after the wedding (FI will be 34). There are some genetic issues (Down's...etc) in my family, so I've been advised to seek some genetic couselling... blah blah. It's kind of a crap shoot.. hehe. I just plan on taking my mulit vits, having good prenatal care with my GP/OBGYN, eating healthy and staying active. That's my 2 cents!

      #3 Kelly C

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        Posted 17 December 2008 - 03:41 PM

        It kind of crazy...I am prego and 37. They call me advanced materal age. RUDE! THey are having me do alot more test and ultrasounds than I did when I had my first at 27. THe risk are higher for birth defects and they say it can be harder to get prego after 35. Which in my case was not harder. I got prego on the first try. I dont think age matters, it is when you are ready.
        Kerrington Danielle was born 6/23/09 12:31 pm 7lbs 14oz.


        #4 Celina

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          Posted 17 December 2008 - 03:50 PM

          I had my son when I was 34. Like everyone else says, it's the increased risk of Downs and genetics...blah, blah blah. If you are in good health, aren't overweight and are pretty active, I think you'll be fine. Don't let em scare you.
          "Love is not who you live with...it's who you can't live without"

          #5 wendy

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            Posted 17 December 2008 - 04:04 PM

            I really appreciate the advice, ladies! I'm 35 and F is 40. We're getting married early '09 and have spoken often about 'to child or not'. ANY advice on the age-thing is so appreciated. But it's a bit zany because it's not like you can turn back time. There are stories that can certainly scare you! When it all boils down, I do like the approach of being smart with your health and doing what's best for you as a couple. Any other stories or advice out there?
            ~ Wendy & Craig ~
            February, 2009
            Grand Marival all-inclusive Resort
            Nuevo Vallarta, Mexico

            #6 YoursTruly

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              Posted 17 December 2008 - 04:07 PM

              As stated, the docs have to ensure they provide details and all the POSSIBLE risks and complications. If you have a certain concern based on genetics then extra care needs to be given. If you are healthy as a horse, you will be fine.

              Heck I had my son at 34 and we are getting married in March! We could not quite wait for the wedding as I chose not to be 35 and prego. Personal choice based on circumstance too! Of course my conservative family almost had cardiac arrest but I have always done what I want to do not what makes them happy.

              I wish you well--motherhood is the best.

              #7 Tiffiney01

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                Posted 17 December 2008 - 04:24 PM

                I'm 37 no children I got pregnant at 24, miscarried and almost died so I didnt want to try again out of fear and now that I'm older I'm concerned that it will be even more complications . My Dr said that I would be able to concieve but I would be high risk and would have to be on bed rest blah blah blah. I just didnt want to go through that pain again but at the same time I dont want to cheat my FH he has no children as well. So after a long talk
                We decided to try after the wedding well actually our wedding night.
                Mr & Mrs Newby

                #8 KatyKo

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                  Posted 17 December 2008 - 04:28 PM

                  These thoughts are great to hear. I am 25, but I don't plan to have children for quite a while. Of course, since I am getting married, everyone is already pushing it, but I just know it is no where near time for me yet and my FI feels exactly the same way. That may change in the next 5 years or so, but I don't want to have a baby just because I need to have one before I am 30 or 35. I guess if I end up waiting too long, I could always adopt :)

                  Thanks for the words of wisdom, as always.

                  #9 IrieBride08

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                    Posted 17 December 2008 - 04:49 PM

                    I'm 37 also and we plan to try for a baby starting Feb 09. I agree with the ladies who share that with great pre-natal care, healthy lifestyle, etc. everything should be fine. I'm banking on it!

                    #10 ACDCDCAC

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                    Posted 17 December 2008 - 04:57 PM

                    my bil and sil had a baby at 38 and while it was hard for them, they ended up needing invitro, my niece is happy and healthy :)

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