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Have a Happy Period! Lol

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#1 KAMAY11

  • Jr. Member
  • 456 posts

    Posted 03 December 2008 - 06:54 PM

    I thought this was cute....

    >This is an actual letter from an Austin woman sent to American company
    > Proctor and Gamble regarding their feminine products. She really gets
    > rolling after the first paragraph. It's PC Magazine's 2007 editors'
    > choice for best webmail-award-winning letter.
    > Dear Mr. Thatcher,
    > I have been a loyal user of your 'Always' maxi pads for over 20 years
    > and I appreciate many of their features. Why, without the LeakGuard
    > Core or Dri-Weave absorbency, I'd probably never go horseback riding
    > or salsa dancing, and I'd certainly steer clear of running up and down
    > the beach in tight, white shorts. But my favorite feature has to be
    > your revolutionary Flexi-Wings. Kudos on being the only company smart
    > enough to realize how crucial it is that maxi pads be aerodynamic. I
    > can't tell you how safe and secure I feel each month knowing there's a
    > little F-16 in my pants.
    > Have you ever had a menstrual period, Mr. Thatcher? I'm guessing you
    > haven't. Well, my time of the month is starting right now. As I type,
    > I can already feel hormonal forces violently s urging through my body.
    > Just a few minutes from now, my body will adjust and I'll be
    > transformed into what my husband likes to call 'an inbred hillbilly
    > with knife skills.' Isn't the human body amazing?
    > As Brand Manager in the Feminine-Hygiene Division, you've no doubt
    > seen quite a bit of research on what exactly happens during your
    > customer's monthly visits from 'Aunt Flo'. Therefore, you must know
    > about the bloating, puffiness, and cramping we endure, and about our
    > intense mood swings, crying jags, and out-of-control behavior. You
    > surely realize it's a tough time for most women.
    > The point is, sir, you of all people must realize that America is just
    > crawling with homicidal maniacs in Capri pants... Which brings me to
    > the reason for my letter. Last month, while in the throes of cramping
    > so painful I wanted to reach inside my body and yank out my uterus, I
    > opened an Always maxi-pad, and there, printed on the adhesive backing,
    > were these words: 'Have a Happy Period.'
    > Are you f------ kidding me? What I mean is, does any part of your tiny
    > middle-manager brain really think happiness - actual smiling, laughing
    > happiness, is possible during a menstrual period? Did anything
    > mentioned above sound the least bit pleasurable? Well, did it, James?
    > FYI, unless you're some kind of sick S&M freak, there will never be
    > anything 'happy' about a day in which you have to jack yourself up on
    > Motrin and Kahlua and lock yourself in your house just so you don't
    > march down to the local Walgreen's armed with a hunting rifle and a
    > sketchy plan to end your life in a blaze of glory.
    > For the love of God, pull your head out, man! If you have to slap a
    > moronic message on a maxi pad, wouldn't it make more sense to say
    > something that's actually pertinent, like 'Put down the Hammer' or
    > 'Vehicular Manslaughter is Wrong',
    > Sir, please inform your Accounting Department that, effective
    > immediately, there will be an $8 drop in monthly profits, for I have
    > chosen to take my maxi-pad business elsewhere. And though I will
    > certainly miss your Flex-Wings, I will not for one minute miss your
    > brand of condescending bullshit. And that's a promise I will keep.
    > Always. . .
    > Best,
    > Wendi Aarons
    > Austin , TX

    D & K
    October 16th, 2008-Riu Palace Cabo San Lucas


    #2 Jacilynda

    • Sr. Member
    • 2,777 posts

      Posted 03 December 2008 - 07:25 PM

      LOL this is great. FI and i saw a always commercial last night and were saying that that is DUMBEST slogan ever! We weren't even thinking of bloating and cramping, its just dumb!

      This really made me laugh!


      #3 Jess

      • Sr. Member
      • 4,455 posts

        Posted 03 December 2008 - 08:42 PM

        haha that is great

        #4 jessyg20

        • Jr. Member
        • 263 posts

          Posted 03 December 2008 - 09:37 PM

          I love it!!!!!

          Thanks for posting!

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          #5 mpajkos

          • Jr. Member
          • 359 posts

            Posted 03 December 2008 - 11:41 PM

            What a great letter! I mean what coworkers of his shook their heads and said "thats it, great slogan! Lets go with it"? Really?!?

            #6 Christi

            • Sr. Member
            • 1,905 posts

              Posted 03 December 2008 - 11:48 PM

              LMAO! Kudos to the woman who wrote it!

              #7 IslamoradaBride

              • Jr. Member
              • 459 posts

                Posted 10 December 2008 - 12:55 PM

                Too funny! I remember when I bought some Always pads when that slogan came out and my response was, go fuck yourself Always! My periods are not happy times! I didn't write them a letter though.

                #8 *Casey*

                • Sr. Member
                • 5,209 posts

                  Posted 10 December 2008 - 12:57 PM

                  Hahahaha... too funny!

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