Dealing with Families and a DW....
Posted 14 November 2008 - 01:49 PM
Posted 14 November 2008 - 02:15 PM
Posted 14 November 2008 - 02:18 PM
Something similar happened to us and as it turned out, my FH's brother (best man) is coming ALONE without the wife and 4 kids. AND, we paid for his airfare. Still, he complained the resort was too much! Gimme a break.
One thing I've learned throughout this entire process is people will find $ to do the things they really want to do. And they will say they don't have $$ for the things they really don't care about.
Example, my FH's brother I was telling you about. We told them in JANUARY about the wedding so they can start saving $$$. Well, they immediately told us they didn't have the money to go. The year goes by and guess who went on more vacations than my FH and I? Yup. The brother took the entire family for a long weekend beach trip for the Fourth. And in September took the entire family to disneyworld for a week! A whole week! Plus, add in a couple of long weekends here and there. And this is the guy who told us he didn't have the $$$ to bring his family to our wedding and the guy we had to pay airfare for!
I know it's a tough call but if you want a DW then go for it. I say screw everyone else. My argument to those who aren't coming to our wedding is "hey, we gave you almost AN ENTIRE YEAR to save for it." If you couldn't do it in that time, well, you really didn't care to come!
Have your DW wedding! No regrets.
Posted 14 November 2008 - 03:36 PM
I completely agree with "can't wait"...people will find the money to do the things they really want to do. You are being very generous by offering to pay for their airfare and honestly that's all you can do.
I've struggled with the same thing because I want to try to make everyone happy and don't want people to be financially burdened. We have some friends that have decided to save all year and make our wedding their family vacation because they really want to be there. Then there are people like my Dad...who is "going to try to come if he can get enough money saved"....yet he's spending over $5000 to go on a fishing trip in Brazil!?! Obviously my wedding isn't a priority to him.
It's disappointing and it stings but at the end of the day it's about you and your fiancee. You aren't going to make everyone happy...even if you have a wedding at home. The people that really want to be there are going to find a way to come.
So focus on what the wedding is all about...you and your fiancee! And have FUN!
P.S. I'm getting married at Dreams Tulum just a few weeks after you. I can't wait!
Posted 14 November 2008 - 04:16 PM
Posted 14 November 2008 - 04:31 PM
Posted 14 November 2008 - 05:01 PM
Posted 14 November 2008 - 05:02 PM
Posted 14 November 2008 - 05:05 PM
Posted 14 November 2008 - 05:09 PM
I totally agree with what you are saying. I have told everyone what the plan is and told them we would love for you to come but if you cant we understand that way there is no pressure on anyone and really all I care about is getting married on the beach with my husband to be. I think right now there are 4 couples coming. My daughter and her husband, son and his girlfriend and my future in-laws, and my moh and her husband. And if for some reason they all cancel thats fine with me!
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