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RSVP Etiquette

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13 replies to this topic

#1 mandalaybay3071

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    Posted 27 October 2008 - 03:57 PM

    Hi girls! Need a PC way to say something..........here goes. We are having a small wedding in July at Secrets Maroma Beach. I mailed our invitations out this past week. However, we are being eco-friendly so I didn't send an RSVP with the invites. What I did was, on the bottom on the invitation I put "for details and to RSVP please visit our website" and of course, listed the web address. I found a really awesome free website that includes an RSVP link. What I want to make sure is that people don't just RSVP thinking Oh, a destination wedding sounds fun and sure I'll go. THEN, once they check their vacation time, budget, etc, they decide not to go and then I've done all this planning around the RSVP responses. So, what I'd like to do on our website it say something to the effect of "Your RSVP confirms not only your attendance but that a deposit has been made to the travel agent." I don't want to sound rude but I've read so many times that people get all excited about destination wedding but then they find out that it will cost them a couple grand to go, they change their minds. I hope this makes sense. I would appreciate any "wording" advice!!

    #2 Maura


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    • Wedding Location:Westin Los Cabos

    Posted 27 October 2008 - 05:20 PM

    you should put 3 options if you can -

    1) (NO response) We regret that we won't be able to attend.

    2) (MAYBE response) We'd like to join you but need to iron out the details.

    3) (YES response) We will be joining you and have made a deposit with the travel agent.

    something to those effects so that if you have "maybe" people, you at least KNOW they're maybes and not 100% yes.

    #3 DallasAshli

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    • 451 posts

      Posted 27 October 2008 - 05:27 PM

      I agree with Maura - if you can have multiple options, do it. I think ours were something like:

      Absolutely, my bags are packed
      Yeah!, but let me run some numbers before I commit
      Put me as a "maybe"
      Bummer, can't make it

      So we really gave them 2 "maybe" options - depending on their level of interest. I counted the "maybe" as not very likely and the "run some numbers" as likely.

      But honestly, we got way more "Absolutely" and "Bummers" than anything :)

      #4 ~Kate~

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      • 329 posts

        Posted 27 October 2008 - 07:37 PM

        We did something similar on our website...our options were something like "Absolutely, see you the beach!" and "Sorry, can't make it but have a margarita for me." We had some people come to us and say that they couldn't commit right now and asked when our "need to know" date was. But most people either committed right away or told us they wouldn't be able to make it.

        #5 soon2bePowers

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          Posted 27 October 2008 - 08:40 PM

          I agree with giving options. I am actually have a hard time with this. We sent out STD's and our travel agent needs deposits in the next month or so. With a STD you don't do a RSVP thing so I have been relying on what people put on out website!

          #6 mandalaybay3071

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          • 58 posts

            Posted 27 October 2008 - 09:07 PM

            So, I checked our website RSVP options and unfortunately, it's either yes or no. So, here it what I wrote:

            Please let us know by February 1st if you are able to attend! We are being eco-friendly so there will not be formal rsvp's mailed out. Please use this site as your official response. We would like to request that an RSVP of "YES" confirms not only your attendance but that a deposit has been made with the travel agent. This will allow us to plan the wedding, cocktail hour and reception more efficiently.

            What do you think? Rude? or just to the point?

            Thanks for all your suggestions!!


            #7 cantwait2718

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              Posted 27 October 2008 - 10:57 PM

              I think it's just to the point. Not rude at all. I like it.

              #8 DallasAshli

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              • 451 posts

                Posted 28 October 2008 - 09:33 AM

                I agree - not rude at all. Sounds good!

                #9 neen

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                  Posted 28 October 2008 - 09:41 AM

                  I think that's fine - not rude, just to the point. perfect!

                  #10 Trice

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                    Posted 08 November 2008 - 01:28 AM

                    I think its fine. Straight to the point. It makes me want to change my website.

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