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Why is the thought of changing my last name freaking me out?

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#41 Tranch

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    Posted 02 November 2008 - 03:44 PM

    I am in the same boat as all the girls who don't want to change their name. I have had my name for 34 years and it is a part of me. Me and my FH have been together almost 11 years and that is one of the main reasons for putting off the wedding after we got engaged. We have both decided that it was time to get married but I still really don't want to change my name.

    It's weird growing up I could't wait to get married so I could change my last name (O'Connor) now I like it and it's who I am. I don't like my FH last name (Lester) and it sounds like a tounge twister with my daughters name (Kaylee). She's 12 and said that she would like to change her name.

    I probablly will change our names because it is the right thing to do. I keep joking with my FH that we both shopuld change our last name to somthing really cool. He just laughs and thinks that I am joking. Really I'm not

    #42 SgtPepperette

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      Posted 02 November 2008 - 04:53 PM

      I was just thinking about this. I couldnt wait to have my last name changed, it linked to my birth father who I havent spoken to in 19 years. But this past year my stepfather adopted me, and than he passed away. So now my last name means so much to me

      #43 cdc0427

      • Jr. Member
      • 330 posts

        Posted 02 November 2008 - 09:30 PM

        I have this issue too. The business I am, your name is the most identifiable (sp?) thing. My FI doesnt like the business I'm in anyway so he could care less about me keeping my name. (It's a very demanding, time consuming business) I have decided that this is one argument I want to avoid so I will change my name. Because my business is named after my maternal grandparents and most people call me by their last name anyway it doesn't matter.

        I have to admit, this forum has brought up this issue again in my mind. After reading it, I'm like maybe I'll keep my last name and just add his legally but at work use my maiden name and he really doesn't even have to know. I can't do that though, it's just not right.

        Besides, we have three kids together and I'm tired of not having the same last name as them.

        #44 Lenchika

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        • 39 posts

          Posted 02 November 2008 - 09:31 PM

          Ladies - I already posted the that I don't really want to change my last name. I have my apartment and my FI has his own place, and I stay/live with him. All my mail goes to my own address. So...few days ago, I received some mail at my FI's apartment where it had my first name and HIS last name - and you know what - it was so exciting and heartwarming to see that. I was surprised with my own reaction...I am having doubts about having doubts :)

          #45 edssbride09

          • Jr. Member
          • 233 posts

            Posted 02 November 2008 - 09:48 PM

            I have opted not to change my last name, not because i am super attached to mine, but because his is... GROSS!!! Augh. I refuse to be Mrs. Gross... and raise little Gross babies... I was originally going to add his (no hyphen), but now, i am opting to keep mine until we have kids... then they will have both names (no hyphen) and can use whatever they choose once they are old enough...

            He won't change his, i won't take his... so this is our solution. We have had 7 years together to plan this out so I am fine with the solution.

            #46 mspattemac

            • Jr. Member
            • 168 posts

              Posted 11 November 2008 - 04:20 AM

              Wow I was so relieved to see this topic. I thought I was the only one. It has been freaking me out a little bit too. I never thought I would have a problem with changing my name.. but I hoped that I wouldn't get a name that was hard to pronouce, that I had to spell out all the time or one that was too plain and common.
              I'm 31, we've been together 7 years, I dont like his last name, and for the past few years I feel like my maiden name is part of my identity. I do not have a middle name so I guess I will probably end up taking my maiden name as my middle name. I think I will feel better if I can keep it somehow. I guess I'll see how I feel about it next October.

              #47 Soon To Be Mrs. Gomez

              Soon To Be Mrs. Gomez
              • Sr. Member
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                Posted 11 November 2008 - 04:58 PM

                Like many brides-to-be on here, I am also freaked out about changing my name. I was married once before at a very young age and I was not really given a choice to keep my maiden name so now that I have it back, I want to hold on to it for dear life! Ha! Ha!
                My FI knows that I will take his name, but I will keep my maiden name as a middle name.

                #48 amberagd

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                  Posted 19 November 2008 - 03:11 AM

                  I don't think I will be changing my last name either. Especially professionally- I will continue to keep my last name as a professional since that is how I am known in my field.
                  Eugene, OR

                  #49 uspoiledme

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                  • 167 posts

                    Posted 19 November 2008 - 05:08 AM

                    I don't like the sound of my first name with my FI's last name. It's really boring and sounds like it would belong to a really old 4 foot tall librarian who has tiny little glasses perched on the tip of her nose!
                    I definitely want to keep my last name. Wow! Now I have to add one more thing to my list of cons. LOL Just kidding.

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