Strippers at Bachelor Party?

[bdegreeff]

I really don't think you have anything to worry about if he is just going to a strip club. I used to go sometimes with my guy friends b/c it was open later than any of the local bars. The women dancing in these places are usually not very good looking, and keep in mind most of it is from a distance. That being said, there are tables around the outside and usually chairs right up along the edge of the stage. The men who sit right along the stage tend to spend a lot more money, and get a lot of personal action directly in front of them...

I think you should discuss what lines you are comfortable and not comfortable with your fiance crossing. Having been there and seen what goes on, I would NOT be comfortable with my fiance sitting right up front with a view of everything, and yes, i mean everything, less than 2 inches away from his nose... However, I would have no problem with him sitting around a table with his buddies drinking some beer and watching the "show".

The best thing you can do is be open with your fiance. If you really don't trust him, then you need to re-evaluate the situation and figure out why you dont trust him. You might be surprised by his response. Most guys I know don't really find strip clubs that appealing but they go b/c its the "guy thing to do". Also, I think your fiance may be upset if you pretend it doesnt bother you and he thinks you don't care what hes up to...

Just my opinions... take them for what you will.

[misstrae76]

How ironic that I stumble upon this thread! My FI have been discussing this hot topic for a while now! As a matter a fact, just a few hours ago! We are still in negotiation mode! LOL!

[aerazo]

everheard of the VIP room at strip clubs? Where its a private dance for the guy and yes, i read there is more touching allowed...grrr... i just have all these worst case scenerios in my mind and its driving me crazy! My guy is not like that all, but u never know with all his buddies around and being it is HIS bachelor party, who knows what can happen...

[sjmacphe]

Ugh, I have to revive this thread. My FI's friends are back to bringing up the bachelor party in Vegas idea. I think it's not such a great idea, my FI doesn't even want to go (well he's torn, I think he does but could go without it). One of his friends is pushing him to do it and has essentially already planned it and told him he has to go...Ok, that's fine, but I saw the itinerary and his friend has Strip clubs planned as nightly entertainment like 3/4 nights....SERIOUSLY?? Ugh, I know it's cause this guy is a virgin and that's the closest to action he gets (he's religious seems like an oxymoron I know...), but i am not really comfortable with them going that much...I guess I shouldn't really care if they go once of 3 times in a weekend, I haven't talked to my FI about it yet b/c I "accidentally" looked at the email...I don't know what to do, I wish they just wouldn't go...why does this make me feel so uncomfortable? I think it would be different if all of his friends weren't so ridiculous/immature...this sucks!!

[SusieQ]

yeah I hear you ladies.... I am not sure why strippers have anything to do with getting married....The person getting married is already said I am committed, it just seems like the groom's friends are saying "are you sure, look at this". I find the whole thing disrespectful and dirty.

I know my husband and I both didn't even consider anything like that... I thought people had moved away from tha kind of venue for staggs

[vdaybride]

This topic has and will continue to enrage women around the world. I wouldn't necessarily get bothered by him going with his friends for his "night out on the town" I would mind him traveling out of town to do it. I have been in Vegas and Amsterdam many times to see bachelors going waaaay to far. If he is staying local and going out with his friends, I would say don't stress him out! If he is going out of town for these "adventures" I would sit down with him and have an honest conversation and let him know your feelings and that you expect him to respect those feelings. Sad to say though when alcohol and "friends" are involved those conversations may go out the window. So then I say entrust your feelings in one of his close friends and bribe him to give you juicy details when the trip is over Try not to stress he is buying the cow..no more freebies. The only way not to cry in those types of situations is to laugh a little.

[march132010]

I have seriously have no problems with my FI seeing strippers, We have a local strip Joint that we hang out together with my boss (go figure) and have a few beers, I know with out a shadow of doubt, he does not want them---

[Kelitaw]

My FI and I struggled with this alot before our weekend of bachelor/bachelorette parties. It was definitely more my concern than his (no surprise there, right?!?!). He expressed this concern to his best man but apparently it was not heard. After a night of drinking excessively they tried to get him into a club but the bouncer would not let him in because he was beyond drunk. Never before have I been so happy to hear that he was too drunk to get in to a club!

[carolina24]

Quote:

Originally Posted by sjmacphe Ugh, I have to revive this thread. My FI's friends are back to bringing up the bachelor party in Vegas idea. I think it's not such a great idea, my FI doesn't even want to go (well he's torn, I think he does but could go without it). One of his friends is pushing him to do it and has essentially already planned it and told him he has to go...Ok, that's fine, but I saw the itinerary and his friend has Strip clubs planned as nightly entertainment like 3/4 nights....SERIOUSLY?? Ugh, I know it's cause this guy is a virgin and that's the closest to action he gets (he's religious seems like an oxymoron I know...), but i am not really comfortable with them going that much...I guess I shouldn't really care if they go once of 3 times in a weekend, I haven't talked to my FI about it yet b/c I "accidentally" looked at the email...I don't know what to do, I wish they just wouldn't go...why does this make me feel so uncomfortable? I think it would be different if all of his friends weren't so ridiculous/immature...this sucks!!

im sorry, maybe i'm crazy but this REALLY pisses me off!!!! what the hell, why should you be going crazy and be upset over something his FRIENDS want him to do!!! he is NOT marrying his friends, he's marrying YOU and YOUR opinion is the only one that matters. tell your FI to grow some balls and put his foot done with his friends!! if you dont want him going to vegas, then he doesn't go PERIOD! there is no reason for you, or any other ladies on here, to have to "put up" with a situation you are not comfortable with just b/c its a "ritual" or "right" or whatever...bullsh*t!!

my FI and i have a great relationship, i'm NOT controlling or bitchy or crazy, but I do require RESPECT and his bachelor party shouldn't be an exception to this rule. he is going out with his friends and having a good time and i am going out with my girls...but there will be NO strippers in either case b/c we both feel strongly about this!!

if you as a couple are BOTH ok with strippers, thats fine. but it's not fair for you to be worrying or accept a situation that you are not comfortable with so tell your FI how you feel!!

[sjmacphe]

This is tough - he asked me today if I wanted to call this friend and tell him to call the whole thing off, he says I am making him feeling guilty and terrible and now he doesn't even want to go...I mean what does he expect, I'm going to be happy about it? He's told me time and time again I have nothing to worry about - and he has never done anything to make me not believe that...So why can't I just be ok and secure in that fact? I think for me I feel that it is unfair, there is a trip I turned down to Mexico with all my single friends cause I thought that we were trying to save money (and the fact he didn't really like the idea). Now he's just like - do whatever, I don't care - I know he doesn't really mean it though. He feels like me and his friend are both pulling him...but he feels like an ass telling his friend he doesn't want this bachelor party...

I'm glad I told him how I feel, I think he's probably still going to go but he's going to have to make it up to me - I am going to Vegas one day (probably in a year or 2) with my friends too and there's nothing he can say about it.