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Personal Problem

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#21 tchuchuca

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  • 361 posts

    Posted 09 September 2008 - 11:05 PM

    Okay ladies- I have an update. We sat down and talked about it again and he told me that he absolutely is attracted to me, but life has been getting in the way of our sex life. You're right, Erica he does have an extremely high stress job and doing it just isn't what he wants to do to unwind- it's things like fishing and hunting that relax him.

    I told him that it is worrying me about our future and he could understand that. His response when I said that I was afraid that we we're falling into the "just friends" category was- "but who wouldn't want to marry their best friend" (PERFECT ANSWER BY HIM!!!). We've recommitted into making eachother a priority and we'll see how it goes!

    Thank you for everything, girls! I really REALLY appreciate it!

    #22 S2BLennon

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      Posted 09 September 2008 - 11:51 PM

      I am glad to hear that the conversation went well and that you can sleep at night a little better.

      Word of advise, you will always be busy.... Maybe schedule nookie date on the calander and meet at a specific time like an appointment... That way there you are not just thinking about getting around to that, but you are making it a point. Even if it is tough to do.

      Relationships are work. But it is known that the longer you go - the less of a reason to get out of your "rut" because you are just learning to live another way with one another rather than fix it. Its like when you are mad at someone and dont take the effort to mend the issue, you stay mad and it gets worse.

      Go get some nookie and have fun doing it= you are getting married now is the time to have fun. Life is too short!

      #23 *Casey*

      • Sr. Member
      • 5,209 posts

        Posted 10 September 2008 - 08:47 AM

        I'm so glad the convo was a good one. It will all work out... everything does... Keep us updated!

        #24 kate.com


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          Posted 10 September 2008 - 10:07 AM

          Progress is good!
          Now put that plan into action! DOn't wait!

          I think you should follow him out onto the fishing boat and jump him!

          #25 cendcar

          • Jr. Member
          • 163 posts

            Posted 10 September 2008 - 11:39 AM

            Hi Tati,

            I'm glad that you got such great advice from all tha gals here.

            My FH and I are in somewhat of a similar situation. We both work, he is studying for the CFP test, I am planning the wedding...we usually end up just going to sleep.

            If it's been two weeks, we laugh about it and set up a night where we know we will go to bed super early.
            I used to think the same thing...how will this affect our future? But the thing is we are both okay with it and know that after the wedding and test are over, we will have (and make) more time for ourselves.

            I think the key is to always be communicating. I'll be thinking of you!

            Here is the thing...if after your many discussions and promises, he is still not making the effort (meaning he still only makes love to his computer) you really need to search deep within yourself and decided if this is the kind of life you would like to have. I don't mean to sound negative but please be true to yourself.

            Keep us updated and wish you all the best.

            #26 Erica053009

            • Member
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              Posted 10 September 2008 - 09:41 PM

              I am soooo glad you talked about it and cleared the air. Life gets in the way and sometimes neither of you will realize it and sometimes you will either way you always have to confront it right away before it becomes more then just being busy and someone gets indirectly hurt. You should do something really special this weekend like go fishing with him and then out to dinner for you maybe that will calm you both down to reconnect

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