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I need to know how to handle this situation...

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33 replies to this topic

#31 cendcar

  • Jr. Member
  • 163 posts

    Posted 03 September 2008 - 04:33 PM

    OMG...It's because of things like this that I decided to get married a thousand miles away from my family, that way only a few could come.

    Kaylee, I am so sorry that you are going throuhg this. I would go with what Erin B said. In regards to inviting your SIL to your civil wedding....don't do it you will just be angry/stressed the entire time and if she is anything like my mother, she will find a way to make it about herself.

    My mom and my FH's mom are both not coming to our wedding but hey, there will be others there that care about the two of you and that is what you should focus on.

    Remember, you and Doug are starting your own family, nothing else matters!

    #32 cendcar

    • Jr. Member
    • 163 posts

      Posted 03 September 2008 - 04:57 PM

      Okay, sorry about the late response. I got so excited when I read the first page that I started typing away.

      K- I think your response was great.

      Have a great and happy wedding!

      #33 Jenn

      • Sr. Member
      • 1,557 posts

        Posted 05 September 2008 - 12:40 PM

        Originally Posted by KAMAY11
        Jenn-wow our situations are very similar....a**hole in-laws who walk all over our men! I just want to stand up for my FI and tell his family to stop hurting him and letting him down....ugh.
        The part about his sister not wanting to fly because she was 4months pregnant is funny (*sarcasm*) My cousin was 8 1/2months pregnant and flew to BC from LA for her sister's wedding on her doctor's ok...the sh**t people come up with to not come to weddings baffles me!
        Yeah, we are in very similar situations! I hate hearing that someone else is dealing with this kind of crap I totally feel you on wanting to stand up for your FI, but unfortunately, until they are ready to cut their ties, you can't or you look like the evil bitch. Support your FI in whatever he wants to do and vent to us, because from experience, he doesn't want to hear that his family sucks. My DH's line is, "I know they suck, but they're the only family I have left and I don't want to lose that."

        #34 kate.com


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          Posted 05 September 2008 - 01:17 PM

          Originally Posted by KAMAY11
          Ok, here's some background info-My FI is not super close with his family....his mom is a total flake and he has issues with her from growing up. (she was super young when she had him, there was a swinging door of men, abandoning him when he was 13, going w/o electricty and heat for days on end etc.) Everything my FI has accomplished in life has been on his own...he has never asked for anything from her. (Even if he did, she would never give it to him) He also has a sister (who couldn't be more different than my FI...she relies on their mom for everything! Re: money) My FI just can't be bothered with a relationship with either of them, and as our relationship progresses i can see why.

          ANyway, when we got engaged and decided on a DW his sister pretty much decided for me that her daughter was going to be our flower girl. (Fine, not a big deal). She bought a flower girl dress, asked if her friend could come to the wedding (who was going to be in Cabo as well) and swore up, down, sideways and backwards they were going to come to our wedding. NOW, i get an email from his mom saying his sister ISN'T coming (for some reason his sister can't tell me herself?). I am torn....a part of me is sooo mad at them for letting my FI down once again (he would never admit it though) and wondering if I should say anything or just let it go
          You are probably past the point of needing advice, but I would probably let it go. It is about you and your man. Period. Don't let others bring you down! You are his family now! Good luck and I am thinking of you!

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