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not having Attendants?


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We are going with a flower girl only!

We are having our mom's sign as witnesses.

 

I decided to have no bridal party for purely selfish reasons. It is our special day and we want to be the only ones walking down the aisle and we want to be the only ones my guests look at....

 

How many times in your life do you get a whole day where everyone focuses on you?

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I love the idea of not having attendants, but I feel like I would hurt a lot more feeling NOT having people stand up in my wedding. I feel like they are spending a lot of money to share in our event, that if they really want to, they should be able to.

 

Do I sound like too much of a pushover? blush2.gif

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Quote:
Originally Posted by linzluhu View Post
I love the idea of not having attendants, but I feel like I would hurt a lot more feeling NOT having people stand up in my wedding. I feel like they are spending a lot of money to share in our event, that if they really want to, they should be able to.

Do I sound like too much of a pushover? blush2.gif
YES lol I bet if you asked them would you like to spend a shit load of money to wear a dress you might not be keen on and have to do loads of jobs or just turn up at the wedding i know what they'd say lol

Mind you I am cynical lmao friday.gif
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we decided no wedding party because we didn;t want to hurt anyone's feelings. This way we have no one and no one can be upset. Plus, we are only having 30-40 people and how do you pick from your closest friends? We are having our friends kids walk down the aisle-they are 4 yrs old

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We didn't have a wedding party. We had two old friends (one mine, one his) officiate the ceremony, and we had a number of people participate in the ceremony itself. But really, most of the people who spent the time and money to come were people who could/should have been part of the wedding "party" in some form or another. So we decided that the whole group of 50 was our wedding party...no attendants...and every single person there signed the ketubah or wedding contract. Worked out perfectly. =) I don't think anyone was terribly hurt by not participating, and it was much less hassle and stress for us.

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We are still discussing this, but are going in the same direction. We thought about doing just the 2 of us with his daughter as the FG. We have 35-40 ppl going and already told our closest friend that we may not have them stand up. No one is offended and still planning the shower and bachelor/ette parties as if they were standing up with us.

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I am not having a wedding party either, but I did ask my only sister to be my maid of honor. I know how that kind of thing can be very important for sisters. I am going to have her choose her own dress to wear and not have anything formal for her to fork over money to buy.

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  • 2 weeks later...

I'm skipping the bridal party too. My FI has one brother & I have one sister. So, they will be our best man & maid of honor. We're keeping it simple too... I told my sister she can pick any dress she wants as long as it's tropical and has some of my colors.

I chose not to have a big bridal party just to avoid the drama that usually comes with it. SIMPLICITY is key for me. Besides, I have enough trouble deciding my own dress... I can't even imagine trying to pick dresses, shoes, jewelry, etc for other women.

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We each only want one, but I have a feeling that it could be a problem. I want my MoH to be my best friend and he wants his BM to be his step brother that he is really close to. The problem is that his sister is a REALLY jealous person and will be miserable to deal with if she doesn't get to be in the wedding. Half of me wants to just let her deal with it because it is my day, not hers. The other half of me wants to have her as a bridesmaid just to keep things civil with her. Ugh...aren't destination weddings supposed to be easy?!

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We decided not to have anyone stand up with us but we are including our nieces and nephews. We are going to wait to see which ones are coming, then we are going to write each child a letter asking them to participate in our special day. I am going to ask them to either wear white or each one picks a color and we have a rainbow. Right now we are up to 10 kids coming, ranging in age from 1-16. When it comes to signing the legal document, he will have his best friend and I will have mine do the honors. I want to make it as simple and easy for everyone as well as cost effective.

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