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UGG!! I want Bride'sMen...


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So I'm slightly frustrated. I know that in choosing a DW, that some of my friends wont be able to come. I am having a hard time because all of the girls I wanted to ask to be in my bridal party will likely... be among those who can't come.

 

My sister and I are fighting right now and I think she thinks it is ridiculous to spend that much.

 

My roomate works for a church and doesn't want to spend the money.

 

My best friend, who I wanted to be my MOH, has 3 little kids and husband... I'm not in to their finances... but from her reaction to me telling her we decided on DW "have fun with that" leads me to think that... well... she isn't going to be able to do it. I'd really like her kids in my wedding too. sad.gif

 

I'm running out of lady friends! I have spent a few painstaking years trying to become friends with ladies. It doesnt come easy for me ... but guy friends... man, guys are so much easier to talk to... and I've got 3 guys that consider me a sister to them.

 

My other option at this point... my FI has 3 sister... but the relationship between me and them is... well... rocky at best. I almost would rather stand up there alone than with people that I know don't love me and want to support us in making the step.

 

How tacky would it be to have 3 bride's men and 3 groom's girls? I mean... Weird, yes... but tacky?

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*sigh*

 

I want to have ladies... but I've never had the girlie girl type of relationship with people. Its mostly mother hen or business type relationships...

 

I used to have a few super close girl friends -- we were in leadership for a student business organization... but those relationships went out the window when it was best for the business.

 

I don't know if I'd trust the boys to throw me a bridal shower or a bachlorette party. I mean... we would probably end up drinking bad coffee and playing Settlers... when I would much rather go waltzing or on a sailboat.

 

I guess I'm super traditional in mindset -- that's why I'm having a hard time with this. Sam and I "courted" instead of dated... I am a high powered career woman now who wants to get her PhD... but I eventually want to be a stay at home homeschool mom. I've always wanted a cross between leave it to beaver and little house on the prarie with the fashion sense of Stacey and Clinton.

 

I guess, for once, I'd like something that resembled a normal rite of passage. My mom died when I was young, so I wont have a mom there... and my dad and I are trying to reconcile our relationship -- he was abusive to me but thinks I'm making it all up... so I've thrown around the idea of not having him walk me down the aisle (i want to be given in marriage) but the whole situation makes me sour.

 

I guess I just need someone to say "its ok. it will be ok, whatever you decide."

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