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Co-habitating- Good or Bad idea?

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26 replies to this topic

#21 starchild



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    Posted 24 May 2008 - 01:10 PM

    Good idea for us but to each their own. When we met we were inseparable and went from friends to dating to moving in together in a short period of time. It didn't make logical sense but we went with it, and nobody could have stopped us. 9 years later we are married and happy as clams :P

    We have such fond memories of living together, especially in the early years when we were figuring out the adult thing together. We had roomates at first and it was a blast, then we moved into our own place and it was a different kind of blast. We learned how to work with each other at a young age...before what you "should" do was a factor, we just did what we felt and after marriage this stuff was already in place and there was no confusion or akwardness. It was very organic.

    We actually break down our relationship into stages marked by where we lived...this place we were in the party phase, this place we became introspective, etc. It all made us who we are as a couple.

    Originally Posted by JessicaLovesBrian
    I'm all for living together before marriage. Hell, I'm all for living together INSTEAD of marriage.
    Hahaha me too...whatever works!

    #22 nikkianddean

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      Posted 24 May 2008 - 02:35 PM

      Originally Posted by Christine
      for us in the beginning it was more a practical matter, why would we pay two rents when we were spending all our time together, then we moved away and it would have been a huge waste to get two apartments in a really expensive city.
      That was our feeling too Christine! I was not worried about delaying our engagement because I was sure that we both wanted to get married and it woud happen at the right time. it really does depend on the couple!

      Mr. & Mrs. C
      February 14, 2009

      #23 July09

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        Posted 24 May 2008 - 04:15 PM

        I was pretty much living with my FI from the day we met. I know, sounds funny, but I was working and living in a bed and breakfast and he checked in. Then about six weeks later we decided to get an apartment together because I was looking to move and needed a roommate to be able to afford the place where we lived. 3 years into the relationship and we have yet to even have a real argument.
        Some people are just meant to be together.

        #24 A10CalGal

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          Posted 24 May 2008 - 04:17 PM

          I must say that co-habitation pre-marriage was a MUST for me. I needed to know I could stand living with my DH. Also, he has children, so I needed to make sure I could deal with that situation. I can't even imagine getting married without checking those things first - but my situation is a little different than most.

          #25 dragonfly

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            Posted 24 May 2008 - 05:34 PM

            Originally Posted by JessicaLovesBrian
            I'm all for living together before marriage. Hell, I'm all for living together INSTEAD of marriage.
            Cheers to that

            #26 foxytv

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              Posted 24 May 2008 - 06:36 PM

              I moved in with Tom after we had dated for almost a year. Then, 3-months later, he was deployed to Iraq for 14-months ... so we didn't actually live together for very long ... and then I was in his house for the entire time that he was overseas (we got engaged a week before he was deployed). So, he got back in August '07 and we've lived together since. It's been fabulous and I would not have gotten married without living together first. I know it's much different than how our parents did it ... but it's certainly been a benefit of our relationship.

              #27 ~St.T Bride~

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                Posted 24 May 2008 - 07:03 PM

                "why buy the cow when the milk is free?"

                You wouldn't buy a house without checking it out first. Living together first is great. Hopefully by the time you get married you have all of the little picky things worked out. And if it didn't work out, you can choose to move on without strings attached!

                That being said, I have a friend who didn't because she insisted it made her marriage seem more 'special' being able to combine their lives after the wedding.

                To each their own I guess!

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