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I need to vent - I don't want to do this anymore


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#1 Celina

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    Posted 30 April 2008 - 01:56 PM

    I am so tired of cutting back on everything all for this stupid wedding. FI sees the light at the end of the tunnel (a 10 day vacation) - however I don't.

    I can't eat anything cause I'm on a diet, I can't go anywhere because I had an unexpected dentist bill to pay (I sucked up all my flex cash for the year on my daughters braces which I underestimated on - my fault for not budgeting last year), I want to go to New Mexico this weekend to my cousins birthday party, but can't go because gas is so damn expensive in my SUV, I am supposed to have a party on Friday but I am cancelling that too because I don't want to deal with it.

    I could afford all of the other things I want to do but I am paying for a wedding!!

    I am overwhelmed with my whole life right now. My MOH is poor and can't afford the deposit for her trip and now I opened my big mouth and said I would pay the deposit which I thought was $300 - but it's actually A$500. I can't find the courage to tell her I can't pay for it so I haven't said anything to her about it.

    I feel like such a loser.
    "Love is not who you live with...it's who you can't live without"

    #2 TammyB

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      Posted 30 April 2008 - 02:01 PM

      I went through the exact same thing, I was thinking we could be doing so much more with the money we spent on the wedding if we just had something with just the two of us. But DH really wanted to move forward with the wedding and we did and I'm so happy we did. Yes the planning stages is hard and we cut back alot but in the end it will be worth it.... You'll see..

      #3 Maura

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      Posted 30 April 2008 - 02:02 PM

      aw honey. well first, can you tell your MOH that you can only afford to pay half after looking at your budget? or some small amount to help her? i feel you on this because you want to be nice and have people there, but its hard financially for you too. i wish i never offered my parents money toward their stay because its totally draining my "me" fund that i use to go out to a nice dinner with jose or treat myself to a spa service.

      #4 Jessica

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        Posted 30 April 2008 - 02:05 PM

        Aww, hang in there honey. I had a complete breakdown about money too before our wedding. It's just sooo much money for that one day. But trust me, that 10 day vacation is absolute heaven and well deserved!

        #5 Kat81

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          Posted 30 April 2008 - 02:07 PM

          We are in the same boat... We are use to being able to just go and do whatever. We just bought a house friday and we are building a fence which ended up costing almost 7000 and we had to get a fridge another 1500. We didn't budget enough for the fence so we are in a tight spot right now. We literally had to come up with almost 20,000 in three months. BLAH! Our friends are going to Vegas this weekend and we want to go soooo bad and use to we could just jump on a plane and go... but now not so much. You will get through it though. Just stay strong and remember that you are going to have the BEST time on your wedding trip. It will be SO worth it! And when you are done you can get back to your normal living. Maybe have a friend come over and you can do eachothers toes and nails and maybe have a few drinks.

          #6 jajajaja

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            Posted 30 April 2008 - 02:08 PM

            This time was so hard for me too! We really cut out a lot of things we did during the savings period (movies, dinner, trips, etc) and DH was not having it. He was so pouty about me cutting back the spending and I was so pissed he didn't get it. We would fight over the budget constantly.

            In the end, it's totally worth it. Focus on the good stuff. It should help you get out of this slump and get excited about the wedding and trip.

            As for your MOH, I think honesty is always the best policy. IF you can't afford it, you can't afford it. She should understand. Also understand if she can't afford it either and ends up not going. It will get better!
            Happily married since 2008

            #7 cheese_diva

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              Posted 30 April 2008 - 02:31 PM

              It's true. Many of us have been in the same exact position. You're life is being restricted but I promise it will all be worth it. Maybe getting out and not focusing 100% on your wedding will help. Stress makes EVERYTHING so much worse than it really is. You always have us to vent to!
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              #8 ACDCDCAC

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              Posted 30 April 2008 - 02:34 PM

              Quote:
              Originally Posted by LC_Rachel
              This time was so hard for me too! We really cut out a lot of things we did during the savings period (movies, dinner, trips, etc) and DH was not having it. He was so pouty about me cutting back the spending and I was so pissed he didn't get it. We would fight over the budget constantly.

              In the end, it's totally worth it. Focus on the good stuff. It should help you get out of this slump and get excited about the wedding and trip.

              As for your MOH, I think honesty is always the best policy. IF you can't afford it, you can't afford it. She should understand. Also understand if she can't afford it either and ends up not going. It will get better!
              well said rach :)

              #9 lucy106

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                Posted 30 April 2008 - 02:38 PM

                Celina, I am so sorry to read my date and time twin is going through a rough time! Thats no good at all! I am hoping like all of the ladies have said it will all be worth it. You are sacrificing for a reason, to have the wedding/honeymoon you dreamed of. Please try to stay focused on that. If you are feeling bummed maybe look at pics of your resort or other things you already have to remind you of your goal. You could even put those pics up around the house too!

                #10 monicabrandon2008

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                  Posted 30 April 2008 - 02:44 PM

                  I'm so sorry that you are feeling like poo. I too am going through the same thing. I live away from family and friends and I've been wanting to drive home to visit but can't because of gas prices and this dang budget!!! So, I'm left stuck at the house with FI ALL THE TIME! hahaha I love him and all but wish I had some play money to get away. I just keep telling myself it will all be worth it! Hang in there!
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