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Breathe Sarah Breathe!


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#111 h&a

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    Posted 22 April 2008 - 10:04 PM

    I'm sorry for all this. Big hug to you! I'm glad she wrote and apologized... sometimes weddings and the stress can make people a little crazy but in the end it sounds like she really loves you :)
    Please have the candy buffet still and enjoy it! I know all the guests will, too!

    #112 BarefootBride

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      Posted 23 April 2008 - 08:11 AM

      tell her if she gives guest coffee they are going to stay up all night and never leave her wonderful house!

      #113 becks

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      Posted 23 April 2008 - 09:14 AM

      Sarah - I'm sorry I missed so much of things yesterday but I just couldn't get on BDW. Sounds like things are calm right now - at least on the surface.

      Others have said it and it does look a whole lot like a power play. And unfortunately, those aren't easy to deal with. Stand your ground, but don't challenge her - that will only make things worse.

      Tell her what you want, tell her again, and tell her a third time. Eventually she'll see that she doesn't get to rule the roost and she'll back off.

      Let us know what's happening, and what we can do to make you feel better!

      Lotsa love!

      Happily married since 2008

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      #114 Saraha

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        Posted 23 April 2008 - 11:22 AM

        Thanks girls for all your support. Wasnt the best night in the World..... Some crazy stuff has happened with this wedding but havent flipped out, but after I posted on here things rolled down hill and all of last night until the morning there was no longer a reception.
        I dont know how in the hell things snowballed and got so out of control. I got email after email... a couple from his mom, Keivn got some from his dad and it wasnt good.

        So out of all this chiaos over F-ing CANDY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
        You would think that it would have been something MORE than the CANDY. but is wasnt! is that ridiculous or what?

        Basically what I got out of it and what they told us (AMONG MANY MANY OTHER THINGS) is that they are trying to teach us a lesson. WTF.....
        They said that we need to learn how to buget things and since we are already over (which I was never told of even though i have asked and asked over again, actually asked right before the big blow out if we were over the 5K and they said NO) there is no need to have USELESS and UNIMPORTANT things at our wedding.

        Are you kidding me? IMO this is my wedding if were over budget we are paying and should not be told NO YOU CANT HAVE THIS if Im paying for it.

        So after I was very nice hoping they wouldnt cancel the wedding on us they were very lets say inpolite back. I told them that I actually didnt think twice about having it because its cheap, fun, cute, and thought the guests would like it. And didnt think it was useless or unimportant which is why I wanted it....

        My reply I got back was..."well you asked what I thought about it and I told it"

        So thats my stupid candy story LOL!!
        I cant believe how absolutely riduclous all of this is.

        Oh BTW..... After all this, there is NO candy buffet..... Im not allowed to have it at their house... Geeesh!

        I did get a text form his mom apologizing for everything that happend also this morning. So right now still not sure if were having the AHR!

        #115 Kat81

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          Posted 23 April 2008 - 11:25 AM

          I am speechless....I'm so sorry this all happened. I still don't see what the f'n deal is...

          #116 jajajaja

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            Posted 23 April 2008 - 11:30 AM

            Do you want an AHR? Or are you doing it because the parents want it?

            I'm so sorry this snowballed. THat seems to happen when there are bigger issues that haven't come to surface. It sounds like his parents haven't cut the cord yet. It's like they are grounding you because they don't think you are spending the wedding money the way they see fit. That's bullshit. You two are adults. I would be pissed if my parents gave us our wedding money as leverage to boss us around. That's what it sounds like they did.
            Happily married since 2008

            #117 Celina

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              Posted 23 April 2008 - 11:31 AM

              Wow....what a big freakin control freak! I am so sorry she is this way. Hopefully things will settle down and everything will work itself out.

              Don't feel guilty for standing your ground either.

              "Love is not who you live with...it's who you can't live without"

              #118 Spazz

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                Posted 23 April 2008 - 11:33 AM

                She's worried how a candy bar will look to her friends. Well, I think cancelling the AHR will look worse to them (if they're the type to care about appearances).

                #119 A10CalGal

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                  Posted 23 April 2008 - 11:37 AM

                  WTF? Seriously? No candy buffet? Does anybody over there realize how ridiculous this is? I'm really sorry honey - this is totally crazy. And to go thru all the drama that has happened, and be told that they will not have candy at their house? I'm speechless....

                  And to me, the FMIL appology is totally empty. It's like "oh I'm sorry I crushed all of your dreams and made you feel crazy and sad all day, but I'm still going to crush your dreams. Sorry!"

                  #120 Saraha

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                    Posted 23 April 2008 - 11:37 AM

                    Quote:
                    Originally Posted by LC_Rachel
                    Do you want an AHR? Or are you doing it because the parents want it?

                    I'm so sorry this snowballed. THat seems to happen when there are bigger issues that haven't come to surface. It sounds like his parents haven't cut the cord yet. It's like they are grounding you because they don't think you are spending the wedding money the way they see fit. That's bullshit. You two are adults. I would be pissed if my parents gave us our wedding money as leverage to boss us around. That's what it sounds like they did.
                    Yeah we really wanted one, but just to be a big party, very casual.
                    She just text me to apologize for everything and that they are haveing the reception at their house, she said she feels awful and is afraid things are not the same between us.




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