Lost a bridesmaid
Posted 16 April 2008 - 10:17 AM
I just recieved a phone call last night from one my BMs saying she would no longer be able to attend due to financial reasons. I am trying to be understanding... as I knew money would be an issue with some of my friends... but its frustrating because I asked her after she told me she was 99% sure she would be able to come. She was the one that assured me the price was extremely reasonable for a week in Jamaica - and that since I gave every enough time our friends should be able to figure it out.
I know she is waiting for a ring from her current boyfriend... so I dont know, maybe she is planning on getting it soon and realizing she will have her own wedding to save for
Argh. It greatly upset me last night but I am starting to get over it. But of course last week I decided to finally go for it and order my flowers (signed the contract and paid AAs) and started ordering gifts for the bridal party.
Now I'm not sure what to do. I am relatively okay with just having 3 girls and having an uneven number bridal party... but my OCD-like tendacies prefers matching. (stupid I know). My mom immediately suggested asking my cousin who wouldn't miss the trip for anything - but she honestly drives me nuts and likes to make everything about her.
My first thought was to ask my future, future sister in law (current FI of my FI's brother... they are getting married like 6 months after us). I don't see her that often because she is in Canada... but ever since I started my wedding planning shei has been super supportive and we email back and forth a couple times a week. Now that they are engaged as well, we have been sharing all of our details and plans back and forth for both wedding and nonwedding stuff (future, houses, kids, family vacas, etc). But part of me worries it is to late to ask her... is it rude to ask someone to step up so late? Also, I don't want her to feel that because I asked her, she would have to ask me. (She just sorted out her own bridal party issue).
Any thoughts on the proper way to proceed? Is it okay to ask someone so late in the process? Should I just suck it up and be okay with an uneven bridal party?
**updated page 3**
Posted 16 April 2008 - 10:18 AM
Posted 16 April 2008 - 10:21 AM
Posted 16 April 2008 - 10:23 AM
And if you're worried about her feeling like she needs to reciprocate, tell her that she doesn't and don't think twice about it.
Happily married since 2008
Allurements by Rebecca - Destination Wedding Invitations and more
Posted 16 April 2008 - 10:24 AM
| Originally Posted by lscilley |
I don't think it's rude I would ask her. Just tell her the situation and explain that she was the first person you thought of next. I think she will be thrilled!
Posted 16 April 2008 - 10:28 AM
Posted 16 April 2008 - 10:31 AM
150 INVITES / 6 YES / 13 NO
Posted 16 April 2008 - 12:32 PM
Posted 16 April 2008 - 12:44 PM
If that doesn't work, I wouldn't worry about uneven numbers. I had them and even though I'm an "even" person to, it wasn't a big deal. The girls walked down the aisle singlely and the pictures of the party were staggered. I don't think it will be too obvious it was uneven.
As for your friend, I can't really say much since I don't know her. However, since she is your friend I would like to assume she has the best intentions. Maybe she really did think financially she would be able to go, but something happened and now she doesn't think so.
When it comes to DW, I think we have to be a little more open minded and realize not everyone will make it a priority. While friends should, asking those that don't have a ton of money to spend the little money they do on us can be a sticky situation. At least she gave you plenty of notice and didn't throw you this problem a few months prior to the wedding after everything was purchased.
0 user(s) are reading this topic
0 members, 0 guests, 0 anonymous users