Reasons I regret asking my sister to be my MOH (LONG vent)

[Nrvsbride]

Maura has she called you?

[Maura]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Duchess I agree, don't kick her out, but politely and civilly tell her that since it is unclear whether she will be able to make it there, she is still a BM but you need a MOH who will be present for everything. I am doing a DW for the same reason, CHICAGO is expensive! As it turns out, Mexico is expensive for my guests though during xmas time!!!

i know!!! we looked into doing it here, and it was going to cost like $60K for the amount of people we wouldve had to invite!!!!

Quote:

Originally Posted by becks I agree with Alyssa - if you decide to discuss it with her, TELL her; don't ask. Otherwise the drama will run on forever. I'm still a fan of letting her find out when and if she gets to Mexico.

agreed, i think i just wont tell her until if/when she gets there. she will be told and not asked, not matter when i decide to break it to her.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nrvsbride Maura has she called you?

no! she doesnt even have the decency to call me. everytime i call her and days go by without her calling me back, she claims that her cell has problems and doesnt show her missed calls. bs!

[Nrvsbride]

Eew I can't believe she tells you those lies. Ok she is def passive-agressive. (No offense). Well I'm going to stay optimistic that everything will work out. And I know no matter what happens you are going to have an amazing wedding!

[Alyssa]

agreed, i think i just wont tell her until if/when she gets there. she will be told and not asked, not matter when i decide to break it to her.

 

Maura, if i am over-stepping here i apologize in advance but i think springing something like that on her is cruel and is stooping to her immature, passive-agressive behavior, behavior that you do not admire nor want to emulate. I think you should tell her as soon as possible and not carry that emotional burden around, also you will be able to move on from this and not keep building more and more resentments. By not telling her, it is a set up for more disapointment, don't do that to yourself or to her. alyssa xoxo

[Maura]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alyssa Quote: Originally Posted by Maura agreed, i think i just wont tell her until if/when she gets there. she will be told and not asked, not matter when i decide to break it to her. Maura, if i am over-stepping here i apologize in advance but i think springing something like that on her is cruel and is stooping to her immature, passive-agressive behavior, behavior that you do not admire nor want to emulate. I think you should tell her as soon as possible and not carry that emotional burden around, also you will be able to move on from this and not keep building more and more resentments. By not telling her, it is a set up for more disapointment, don't do that to yourself or to her. alyssa xoxo

alyssa thats a good point, youre right. maybe i can get away without even really having to demote her.... my best friend is married, so i could just have her be my matron of honor? that way my friend gets the title, and my sister/family wont bug out over my sister getting demoted? what do you think

[Alyssa]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Maura alyssa thats a good point, youre right. maybe i can get away without even really having to demote her.... my best friend is married, so i could just have her be my matron of honor? that way my friend gets the title, and my sister/family wont bug out over my sister getting demoted? what do you think

that is a great idea. then just tell her that b/c she is so busy and having financial problems, you are giving MTOH most of the responsibility. tell your MTOH not to stress over including her if she flakes. and then you avoid a war with your family before your wedding!

[jajajaja]

I think that's a great idea Maura. Even though your sister is being a jerk, I'd hate for all this to cause some underlying issues for you both to deal with for a long time. When families fight (even if its for a worthy reason), it's still sad and no one really wins.

 

Hopefully your sister will wake up quick. I think you should really have a heart to heart with her.

[angitalia23]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alyssa that is a great idea. then just tell her that b/c she is so busy and having financial problems, you are giving MTOH most of the responsibility. tell your MTOH not to stress over including her if she flakes. and then you avoid a war with your family before your wedding!

This sounds perfect and then there will be no hurt feelings.

[Maura]

duh why didnt i think of that before?

 

you girls are the BEST. love you!

[Nrvsbride]

I love this idea, its perfect! You avoid drama at all costs (I'm a huge fan of that, I hate confrontations). You will keep peace with your family and get the support you deserve! YAY!