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Possible family conflict with wedding date?

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#1 ~*petals*~

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    Posted 20 March 2008 - 04:19 PM

    Okay, so originally I was planning a summer 09 wedding in my hometown, but soon decided to change my plans to have a destination wedding next May... and now my cousin is crying foul. He's been dating a nice girl for about 10 months, and he says they want to have a destination wedding in Jamaica a month before mine.

    He told me he wants to save up to have a big lavish wedding (we have a big family) and he plans to fly family members out. Thing is they're not engaged yet, and he's currently between jobs.

    Do I try to move my wedding around just in case my cousin's plans fall into place somehow? (There would be a lot of overlap with our guestlists.) I've been dating FH for 6 years, got engaged in January, and we are happy that just set our date for next May.

    What do you think?

    UPDATE: I just wanted to thank you ladies for your advice! I stuck with my plans and moved forward with my May 09 wedding.... And although I am sad for my cousin, I'm relieved that I didn't try to change my wedding plans....

    Here's what happened: He finally started working again & she pushed him to get a ring with his first paycheck. (Never mind the bills that had been piling up...) Found out she was the one pushing for the April wedding too, although the family already knew I was engaged. They got engaged about 3 weeks ago, and ended up breaking up last weekend. (Long story, but it was messy.) Engagement is off, relationship is over.

    I would've been so vexed if I had moved my date and changed my plans to accommodate them! Moral of the story: don't let anybody try to push you into rearranging your wedding plans, especially if their own plans aren't set!

    #2 Spazz

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      Posted 20 March 2008 - 04:24 PM

      Ummm....NO! If he's not even engaged, has no job and no real plans, then don't change what you're doing for him!

      #3 JennyK

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        Posted 20 March 2008 - 04:25 PM

        Originally Posted by Lizz
        Ummm....NO! If he's not even engaged, has no job and no real plans, then don't change what you're doing for him!

        don't let him tell you what to do.. but here's what you do do lol Send out your STDs before him so that way they plan for yours not his hehe

        #4 Kat81

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          Posted 20 March 2008 - 04:26 PM

          I say get those save the date cards out as soon as possible... then IF his plans fall together people will have already planned on your wedding and will call him out on it.

          #5 lucy106

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            Posted 20 March 2008 - 04:30 PM

            I totally agree with Kat. Send out STDs ASAP!! and screw your cousin the nerve. That is so rude! You have your day girl!! Forget him!

            #6 Jacqueline

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              Posted 20 March 2008 - 04:50 PM

              Easy one- NOOOOOOOOO! Don't do it! Send out your save the dates ASAP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Have the wedding you want, and don't change thigns around 4 anyone...escp someone who isnt even engaged yet.

              #7 jean-marcus

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                Posted 20 March 2008 - 04:50 PM

                well who got engaged first.. hmmmm and who planned it first.. im guessing you.. so tell your cousin to eat it

                #8 boscobel

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                  Posted 20 March 2008 - 04:54 PM

                  I can only say what everyone else has said - send out your std's pronto!

                  He isn't engaged, has no job, has no right to "claim his turf"

                  #9 Golden

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                    Posted 20 March 2008 - 05:41 PM

                    You make the 1st step and go for it. Do not let him punk you

                    #10 jajajaja

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                      Posted 20 March 2008 - 05:45 PM

                      Since when do guys get all fussy over this stuff. Weird.

                      Anyways- I agree with everyone. Why does he think he has a right to dictate? I'd send out the STDs ASAP. He hasn't even proposed yet. How can he have a date? Sounds like he's putting the cart in front of the horse.
                      Happily married since 2008

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