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Matron/Maid of honor Dilema


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#1 Bavaro-Princess

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    Posted 17 March 2008 - 02:53 PM

    Hey everyone – I am hoping that I am not the only one having this issue… the thing is that I am having a Maid of honor and also a Matron of honor… who sings the papers? Who walks out with the best man? ughh

    My sister will be my matron of honor and My FI twin sister will be my Maid of honor. My sister got married recently and just had a baby so I don’t expect her to help me out too much with the wedding… My Maid of Honor is helping me with EVERYTHING… I feel bad telling her she won’t be walking out with the best man or signing any of the documents…

    My FI refuses to pick another best man because he says his brother deserves all the glory and that he doesn’t want him to share his spotlight! And he’s right…

    What should I do? Help?

    #2 Alyssa

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      Posted 17 March 2008 - 02:56 PM

      I am having a MOH and a MTOH and 5 BM's.

      My MTOH is my cousin, one of my best friend's and I was her MOH last year at her wedding so she is #1, then MOH is #2 then the BM's.

      I say you should have MOH, then MTOH, really it's your wedding and you can make the rules however you want - there is no 'right' way

      #3 boscobel

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        Posted 17 March 2008 - 03:01 PM

        I think you should choose the one that you are closer to. For me, that would always be my sister at this point in my life. Even if she wasn't able to participate fully due to having children, I am still closer to her then anyone else.

        So I agree with Alyssa in that there is no right or wrong answer. You will just need to figure out who is better suited for the role.

        This was mentioned in another thread today, but what about not having them escorted at all? Have the men stand up front with your hubbie to be and the BM/MOH/MTH can all walk in separately and alone. Or something of the sort. I have 3 BM's and 6 GM's, so I think that is probably waht we will be doing....

        #4 Celina

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          Posted 17 March 2008 - 03:16 PM

          Okay...I'm going to sound dumb here, but what is the difference between a MOH and a MTOH?

          I thought the difference was if they were married...am I wrong?
          "Love is not who you live with...it's who you can't live without"

          #5 becks

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          Posted 17 March 2008 - 03:19 PM

          With regard to the signing, whose name do you want on the document? Think hard about it and you'll know.

          With regard to who walks out with the BM, how about one on each arm? Problem solved and BM looks like a chic magnet!

          Happily married since 2008

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          #6 boscobel

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            Posted 17 March 2008 - 03:19 PM

            Maid of honor - not married
            Matron of honor - married

            I never knew that until recently either!!!

            #7 lucy106

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              Posted 17 March 2008 - 03:32 PM

              I would go with whoever you are closer too, just because your MOH was avl to help you more does not necessarily mean you are closer. I personally am and would have to have my sis! But if your cousin is kinda like a sister to you then just whoever you are closer to.

              #8 ACDCDCAC

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              Posted 17 March 2008 - 04:14 PM

              Quote:
              Originally Posted by becks
              With regard to who walks out with the BM, how about one on each arm? Problem solved and BM looks like a chic magnet!
              This idea rocks :)

              #9 rodent

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                Posted 17 March 2008 - 04:40 PM

                I was recently the maid of honor & another friend was the matron. It was great how it worked out because it would have been hard for her to pick between the two of us. I was closest to her & walked with the best man. I guess her & I have been closer friends lately. But there were other reasons to do it. I'm a pro bridesmaid (9 times) so I typically end up at one of the ends. I had to lead the sitting & standing (catholic wedding). I also walked in alone. The other girl would have been uncomfrotable with that. We were in another wedding together & she had me go last so I would walk in first. I've been down the aisle so many times I don't get nervous.

                It was cool sharing the MOH duty. We took turns fluffing the dress. We gave a toast together. That was one of my favorite parts of the wedding. The pictures are funny too.

                My next wedding has 2 MOHs (her sisters) and me as a BM.

                I think anything goes. The only thing I don't like is feeling ranked in order of how close you are to the bride. I was in a wedding with 6 girls & we were ranked down to the last girl. I think it's best to do MOH & then do the rest by height, alphabetically, etc. Not favorites.

                #10 jajajaja

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                  Posted 17 March 2008 - 04:46 PM

                  Quote:
                  Originally Posted by Morgan
                  The only thing I don't like is feeling ranked in order of how close you are to the bride. I was in a wedding with 6 girls & we were ranked down to the last girl. I think it's best to do MOH & then do the rest by height, alphabetically, etc. Not favorites.
                  Girls actually did that? WOW!

                  I have two girls and FI only has one guy. I thought about having them all walk together but I'm afraid if anyone blinked the wedding party would already be by them. I think I'm going to just have the girls walk alone and have the BM stand by FI. You could have them all walk together (like you would do if numbers were uneven) or have the women walk separately. I wouldn't sweat about it too much!
                  Happily married since 2008




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