Can I disown my mother in law?

[StephanieMN]

I am so sorry--I forgot to answer you question. Yes, yes you can disown her.

[Maura]

girl do you wanna get together for coffee this weekend sat or sun morning to have a bitchfest about obnoxious negative relatives? ive hit my limit with my family! ive already disowned my mom because of her bad behavior, and my stepmom is reaching the stage where she's crossing the line with me. oh, and my dad hung up on me yesterday.

[Yari]

So sorry you are going through this! Try and ingore her comments and have the wedding of your dream.

[becks]

I'm feeling particularly obnoxious today. That caveat being mentioned, I'd suggest this:

 

"Gee, FMIL, I am SO, SO sorry that our wedding plans are so uncomfortable for you. Maybe it would be easier if we just rescinded your invitation. That way you won't have to worry about any of this. We'd miss you of course, but we'll manage."

 

There are just a bunch of people I want to say that to!

[becks]

Quote:

Originally Posted by mauraw girl do you wanna get together for coffee this weekend sat or sun morning to have a bitchfest about obnoxious negative relatives? ive hit my limit with my family! ive already disowned my mom because of her bad behavior, and my stepmom is reaching the stage where she's crossing the line with me. oh, and my dad hung up on me yesterday.

Maura - I'm about ready to fly to Chicago and open a whole big can of whoop-ass all over your family. Mine are annoying; yours are being unreasonable.

In the meantime, call me tonight when you get home and we'll have a glass of wine together!

[starchild]

I'm with the others. Do not give in or you will be setting yourselves up for a lifetime of catering to her. Do it your way with or without her and show her from the start that she has no power in your relationship. What a pain in the ass!

[Copita]

Just smiel and nod and then continue on your merry way.

She will be a part of your life for as long as you're marrieid (your entire life) so you will have to deal with her.

Again, smile, nod, and keep on walking.

She obviously is a drama queen.

[hollisandsteph]

What was her reaction to her son's letter I mean that should have done something! Did she respond at all? It is not very considerate at all that way she is acting. It is your wedding and not hers. You are not getting married for everyone else. It is for you two! I say walk away from her. When she calls, get off the phone asap or ignor her calls.She will get the hint. If she or anyone else doesn't share in your excitement then write her off and surround yourself with people who do!

[beachbride08]

Quote:

Originally Posted by mauraw girl do you wanna get together for coffee this weekend sat or sun morning to have a bitchfest about obnoxious negative relatives? ive hit my limit with my family! ive already disowned my mom because of her bad behavior, and my stepmom is reaching the stage where she's crossing the line with me. oh, and my dad hung up on me yesterday.

Count me in for the coffee b@#$chfest!

I think we have all had our share of a-hole family members, and I don't think it would be any different if you were planning an at home wedding, DW or eloping. Comments will sill be said, people still won't be able to come, etc. This is your day, and you need to plan the wedding that is right for you and your FI. If other people don't like it, screw 'em. Don't let it bother you and ruin your day.

[Allaballa]

I went through the same thing with my MOM. I finally got to the point of telling her that attendance was not manditory and she had her wedding and this is mine and THATS IT!!!

 

Now she walks around saying that I am the smartest, most adventurous, most thoughtful person ever and how smart I was to have a DW.

 

My sister and I were rolling our eyes half the week at the resort.

 

Looking back on it, she was just concerned that she wasn't going to be able to show off her daughter's wedding to her friends. So we compromised and I had a ridiculous wedding shower (hosted by her) with a band and flower and the whole nine yards.

 

My advice is to find out what is behind the griping and explain it all away otherwise you are starting out your life in that family on thw wrong foot.