Still invite people to DW if they can't go?

[IrieBride08]

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Originally Posted by twelve_piece This is bad etiquette but I really don't care, I sent STDs to everyone but I'm only sending invites to people who have actually booked the trip. I wanted to do message in a bottle invites and there was no way I was making and mailin 125 of them. When we get back we are going to send out announcements to everyone else with a pic from the wedding. I know some of my parents friends will be ticked, but my wedding isn't about them.

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Originally Posted by Betsy I did this exact same thing - we sent STD's to everybody that we thought would want to come - then when we got the RSVP's we only sent actual invites to the people that said they would come, However we are sending an announcement of our marriage along with the AHR info to everybody - and we also requested no gifts at our AHR b/c we already live together and really honestly don't need anything - In my family I just thing that some people would've felt like getting a marriage announcement w/ our AHR invite all in the same thing that they were thinking we EXPECTED a gift - and I don't want anyone to think that! - I don't want to offend anyone or make anyone feel left out either!

I completely agree with both of you! This is what I plan to do as well. Invites for attendees only, announcement and invite to AHR to everyone upon our return

[Leslie-Xcaret09]

For our STD's we asked our parents which family members we should send them to. My parents wanted me to send them to everyone that I would invite if we were to get married home, while FI's parents only gave me a list of like 7 people who they thought might come!! So we did just that, sent it to all my family and just a few of his, we then invited some of our closest friends. For the invites, we only plan on sending them to people who have intent to come, but will send everyone a AHR invite. So.....I wasnt lying when the STD said "invite to follow".........they will at least receive an AHR invite

[starchild]

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Originally Posted by angitalia23 I think I may have done it not by the book...but I sent over a 100 STD's that I would potentially have at our after party. However, a year later (now) I sent invites to only those I knew for sure wanted to attend our DW or had serious interest just because I felt it was kind of a waste if they expressed they couldnt go. THey know theyll get a AHR invite so I justified it that way, I guess:)

Quote:

Originally Posted by twelve_piece This is bad etiquette but I really don't care, I sent STDs to everyone but I'm only sending invites to people who have actually booked the trip. I wanted to do message in a bottle invites and there was no way I was making and mailin 125 of them. When we get back we are going to send out announcements to everyone else with a pic from the wedding. I know some of my parents friends will be ticked, but my wedding isn't about them.

Amen to all of that! Don't worry about etiquette, we cut all bonds to tradition when we chose to have a DW. Anything goes and people should be happy for you, not criticizing how many mailings you sent them as opposed to people that are actually going

[BillysBride]

We will be using the STD's as a sort of..preliminary guage for who we invite. We plan to send the save-the-dates to pretty much everyone we would even WANT there, but then the invitations will go to those who haven't decided one way or the other, or have said they will make it. The only exclusion to this will be the elderly family members who truly do like to stay involved in these types of things. Great aunts and uncles including grandparents will all get an invitation regardless of if they are traveling or not.

[vale]

We invited everyone that we would have invited to a wedding at home. So far there are only two people outside of our immediate family (me, DH and our three children) that are going. We realised this would happen but we thought, even if they couldn't be there, its nice to be asked.

 

Hope this helps.

Valerie